What am I doing wrong?!? 5 month old waking every hour plus awake for several hours. Cannot cope anymore..

[AngelynS]

Please someone help me! I cannot think what else i can do. My almost 5 month old has never been a great sleeper but towards 3 months got to waking either once or twice in the night. However the sleep regression has kicked in so hard since he turned 4 months and now he wakes every hour sometimes a couple times within the hour. He wakes for no specific reason and sometimes goes back down with a pat or dummy going back in or sometimes stays awake for a couple hours. I'm starting to really lose it and today feel utterly depressed and unable to handle another second of this battle. I have a 2 and a 4 year old also. His routine-
Wake between 6 and 7 (even if he has already been up for hours I treat it as start of a new day.
Naps at 8.30 for an hour. 11.30 for 2 hours. Usually during this nap he wakes up at some point but I try to get him back to sleep which he tends to do. A final short (45 min) nap around 4pm. Bedtime routine of bath massage bottle and wind down starts around 6pm. Some nights he falls straight asleep other nights he fights it. Either way he is usually up again within 2 hours and then it's a battle to get him back to sleep. By 9ish he will sleep until midnight when he wakes for a feed. He then wakes around 1.30am and every hour from then. At 4ish he may also stay awake until 6am. I am at breaking point!! What am I doing wrong?? We rock him gently to sleep and put him down drowsy but not in a deep sleep. We usually have to lay a hand on chest or pin his arms a little. Sometimes that works other times we end up rocking him. He loves being tightly swaddled but it's been too hot for that lately. He sleeps in his own cot now for the last week in an attempt to try something else. Not sure what else I need to add but pls ask!

Sounds like my middle girlie - she didn’t settle for ages after the 4 month sleep regression. The only way I survived was with co-sleeping, kept me sane! Don’t know if it’s as helpful with bottle feeding though. Now my middle girl is 3 I see that she was probably just waking for comfort - she loves her cuddles! I’m not a fan of controlled crying at all so only advice from me I’m afraid is just to look after yourself as much as you can and grab breaks at any opportunity you have. It’s so hard though, this first bit. Try to remember it won’t last forever - I’m telling myself that now as I’ve been awake for an hour already with my 3 month old struggling with trapped wind!

Awwweeeee this threads take me back!!!!!
Having just got out of bed with a nearly 9 year old ( hes severely disabled) sleep is for losers and I've been doing the getting up at stupid hours for 9 years now!!!!!

Aww I know it won't last forever as he is my third which helps with perspective when I'm thinking logically.. But not so much after waking up the 305967393 time in the night haha!! I guess I thought my first child was bad with sleep but this little man is giving her a run for her money! We have co slept but he is the same to be honest. He doesn't even stay asleep if we hold him.. I think he wants to stay asleep but he just can't remember how and gets frustrated. Last night was slightly better (3 wake ups - one lasting an hour 🙄) so I think cooler weather and a tighter swaddle plus a pyjama walk before bed may have helped.. I guess we will see tonight..

Wow @icebearrocks you deserve a medal!! I guess you can get a lot more done if you start your day at 4am 😉😆

FYI he is now almost 6.5 months old and no better sleep wise! Still waking every 30-45 mins and we are all suffering as a result.. Started a sleep therapist controlled crying plan this evening and so far it is horrendous. Feel like the worlds worst mother but determined to see it through.

Hi Angelyn

Sorry to hear it's no better! I came on this morning to try to find some support as my 4 month old is waking every hour and has been for the past 5/6 weeks. Before that she would sleep for Britain at night... I'm losing the will to live now. I'm really concerned because we are all flying to Canada at the weekend to travel around visiting family for two and a half weeks. Hotels, strange beds, time difference, no access to the usual comforts of home. Not to mention my 2.5 year old will be there... aaargh! I really do not have the energy for this

Like you, I'm happy to sleep train at some point but not at this age, prior to 6 months seems so young. She would just be distraught.

Add into the mix that my toddler is totally regressing post-sibling and is not only getting up early/not sleeping well, he's dropped his daytime nap. I'm packing and arranging the holiday for four people, trying to sort the house and the animals for while we're away, all on a few hours of broken sleep. Aaaargh.

Anyway sorry that was just a rant. Update us as to how you get on with the sleep consultant. How old is your LO now?

Omg poor you I feel for you I really do! I also have a 4 year old and a 2 year old so I do understand! The trip sounds amazing and I guess you don't know how the kids will fare so try to look forward to it. So night 1 of sleep consultant training done. It was so so tough. But my son slept 9 hours straight!!!! With no rocking dummy feeding. Of course we have today's slightly different day nap routine to get through and it's only day 1 so I've got a few more nights of the new plan settling in but I've got to see it through. My son is just a couple days shy of 6.5 months old by the way. Good luck for the trip!!

Omg 9 hours is fab! Well done! I'm hoping with plenty family and my DH around maybe I'll get a little bit of a break and a chance to nap, I'm doing everything myself at the moment and it's so tough...

Good luck and keep going - sounds like good progress!

Night weaning distractable 7 month old.
DD is breastfed and on solids since 5 months. We sleep trained at 6 months but didn’t night wean at the same time because she was only waking once and it was very hot here so I was worried she might need the feed for extra fluids.
Now she is just over 7 months old, on three solid meals a day but she’s back to two night wakings, which are at different times every night. I’m pretty sure that one of them, the second, is not a hunger waking because she doesn’t go right back to sleep afterwards and shes not hungry when she wakes for the day. Last night for example, she was asleep by 8:30, woke for a long feed at 2:00 (although I didn’t feed until 2:30) and woke again at 6:30. I fed her but she didn’t go back to sleep until about 7:15. When she woke again at 8:30 she wasn't hungry and when she finally did nurse at around 9:15 it was only a very quick feed. So, as she’s getting two feeds at night when she wakes for the day she is not having a good feed.
She’s quite distractable when feeding during the day so I take her into a her or my room to feed but she still likes to have a quick nurse (between 2 and 5 minutes) and then start looking around the room.
The last feed of the day is often difficult too. She doesn’t feed as much as I think she should (only about 5 minutes on and off breast) and I'm not sure if that’s due to not being hungry enough (about 2-2.5 hours after dinner) or being too tired (we're in the middle of the 3-2 naps transition).
So, I believe that she could go all night without any feeds if only she would have a good long feed before bed and better feeds through the day but I don’t know if it’s better to first try to drop one feed (and which one?) or to try to drop them both. And how to go about it? Has anyone successfully reduced the time spent feeding to eliminate a breastfeed? Won’t she cry if I put her down before she’s finished? If she’s going to cry I might as well go cold turkey and then she’ll cry less over fewer nights, no?
Does anyone have any similar experiences or suggestions?

Sorry!! I posted the previous message by accident and don't know how to delete it!!