Baby that won’t sleep unless attached to one of us.

[laurG]

I realise that it is very early and there might not be any short term fix... our baby is five days old and won’t sleep un less held by me or dh. He is mercifully s good sleeper and gets to sleep easily but we are completely tied to him. Any ideas how we could work towards getting him in the Moses basket?

I could have written that 15 weeks ago, DS is 16 weeks on Friday and is now happily in his big boy cot next to me. We tried a number of things including rolled up blanket at the top of the Moses basket, white noise and swaddling. I know other people swear by the sleepyhead. Every baby is different but what eventually worked for us was a next to me cot (DS hated the Moses basket) and swaddling. Eventually he got used to sleeping on his own. Hang on in there, it does get easier! My gorgeous boy now sometimes cries when I'm holding him as he wants to be put down 😢

That’s exactly what my daughter was like. DH’s aunt would swaddle her and that worked very well. If you can learn to swaddle him firmly enough that might work.

Thanks for the tips!! Something to try tomorrow. Just got him in the carry cot for ten minutes... all time record.

Dummy and swaddle!

Both my DS were like this. They always prefered to sleep upright on their stomach against my chest.

Also try putting the cot/basket on an incline. My DS were like this because of reflux and neither liked being laid flat.

Take turns cuddling and have faith that with babies, everything passes.

A stretchy wrap sling was a godsend for us in the early days (baby can sleep on you, you can do things with two hands like a functional adult )

Baby has been warm and snug inside you with every last need met immediately for the last 8 months. It's really hard to transition to all the new sights and smells and sounds. You are the most comforting thing he knows. Have a google of '4th trimester'. Having said that, it is exhausting having an unputdownable baby, especially when you are just getting used to having your body back again. As a PP has said, give a stretchy sling a go. A caboo is a good one. If you're breastfeeding it's a good idea to feed first otherwise baby might go a bit bananas being so close to the milk with no access!

Google the 4th trimester. It's totally normal. The godsend for us was getting a Sleepyhead. She slept in that all day as it was like someone cuddling her. Best invention ever.

I had one of those too! Swaddling and white noise (v loud on an app in my phone) worked I think, or maybe she just got used to it as she got older! Good luck!

Sleepyhead, dummy, swaddle, white noise and keep persevering!

My two were like this and I found that always putting them in their sleeting place as soon as they were sound asleep but then letting them sleep on/with me if that roused them and patting or stroking didn't send them back off was the best solution. I think it helped them get used to the sleeping place as a familiar and safe place to be. It felt hopeless at first as they roused and slept on me every time but as soon as they did stay asleep in it a couple of times they soon became quite content with going in there and waking up there too.

Using a sling will really help, as others say. I haven't used a stretchy one though as I wanted them on my back as soon as possible, rather than my front, so a woven wrap seemed better for doing that with a younger baby.

We used to wait until baby was properly asleep (lift a limb and let it drop without waking) and pop a hot water bottle in the crib. Tricking him into thinking it was a nice warm human! Mean but it worked!

Lots of great suggestions. Thanks so much. He is very young so need to give him a chance but fingers crossed there will be a solution!

I absolutely promise you the solution is time for him to adapt to the outside world, and making sure you’ve got enough support while that happens.

The first few months are so intense - you’re doing brilliantly!