Co-sleeping safely

[StepsRoadmum]

We have never co-slept because we've never needed to but my lo is now not very well. I would like to keep a closer on him overnight so would prefer it if he was in my bed but I'd like some practical advice on doing this safely. I've read a number of sites but all give generic advice about now drinking and not using duvets so I'd like some tips from parents who have done this. He's 13 months which brings a number of problems in itself too. He rolls and turns all of the time in his cot so how do I stop him rolling off the bed? He also sits up, crawls and pulls himself up at the foot of the bed and I'm worried he will do this during the night without me noticing?

This might sound stupid but I'm also unsure of what bed clothes to use for myself? Is having a pillow and duvet for me too much of a risk of suffocation for him? He has a sleeping bag.

Practical ideas and suggestions please.

Could you not move the cot into your room. I have co-slept from day one, but also breastfed so I know that made me more aware and not sleep so deeply. At this age my little one would just sit up and crawl towards the end of the bed.

I used to have a bedside to stop him rolling out. I then slept in the other side of the bed. With a duvet and pillow well away from him.

Thanks for the advice. The cot doesn't fit in our room. We had a small crib at the foot of the bed for the first 6 months but he is much too big for that now and no space for a bigger one. May need to invest in a bedside tomorrow.

I co sleep for a part of the night each night but mine isn't old enough to role about or crawl yet so I can offer any advice about that however with regards to duvet- I arrange it so that half is hanging off the bed and I tuck the other half below my waist so it's a sort of diagonal shape across the bed and no where near ds so je cant wriggle under it or pull it. I sleep facing ds with one arm under his bum/ legs so I don't role but I find I don't sleep very deeply anyway. I remove all pillows as well. I don't use a sleep bag for ds when co sleeping as he gets extra heat from me but that's just my personal choice. It's also only me and him in the bed so he gets the middle of the bed. If I'm cold I wear a dressing gown or thick jumper as the duvet only half covers me.

With my DD I put a rolled up towel under the sheet so she can't roll out. Then take pillows away from her side and just put her on that side in her sleeping bag. I have duvet and pillows over me on my side. No DH here though so lots of space for just need and her.

I think it would need to be just us in the bed as he's such a wriggler. I'm afraid DH will be in the spare room for a few nights

Sheets instead of a duvet is recommended or those big cellular type blankets. Warm pyjamas for you if you think you will get cold
I personally use a small flat pillow but the advice is it’s safer without.
Having a firm mattress is important.
I wouldn’t put him in a sleeping bag, he’s more likely to overheat with your body temp compared to in the cot on his own.

In terms of stopping him falling out, I use a bed guard but at 13months they could sit up and climb over it. Mine never did at night but did in the day if playing on bed,etc! I did co-sleep from birth and breastfed so I woke up when they did and I think becuase it was their norm they never really tried to get out the bed/sit up and mess about, etc. I’m not sure if moving from a cot into the bed would make him more likely to climb/roll?? If he does stand up, he could easily fall/get over the bed guard. Could you put your mattress on the floor? That is recommended as being safer.

Could you put his cot mattress on the floor beside you?

DD (9 months) was sick earlier this week and I made the mistake of bringing her in to sleep with me- apparently being in mammy’s bed was the height of excitement and she spent 30 mins climbing over me, the blankets and trying to scale the headboard before my nerves could take no more and I brought her back into her cot where she settled beautifully.

I think some kind of mattress on the floor may be the best option.

@dinosaurkisses I can imagine my DS being exactly the sane as he's never slept in our bed before. It would be quite an adventure for him.

We've coslept from the start. If you're new to it with a 13m old I would definitely try a mattress on the floor first rather than a bed.
Re duvets etc, at 13m I'd only really be worried about things covering them up/ending up over their head rather than generic overheating. Mine kicks covers off anyway, so you might be ok with no bedding and warmish PJ's