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What do we do?

5 replies

Madbee · 04/07/2018 11:49

I’m stuck. DD is almost 9 months and we've tried all sorts to get bedtime (and nights!) to improve, but it just isn’t working. Until about 6/7 months she would happily either feed to sleep or self settle in the evening, but something suddenly switched and now I just can’t get her to go to sleep at bedtime unless she’s been awake since lunchtime when she’s just so knackered she sparks out. My theory is just that she is just way too interested in life, but it’s resulting in 90 minute bedtimes, an upset baby and me at the end of my tether with no relaxation time at all. I’m not after a miracle and would happily feed to sleep if it worked, but it doesn’t any more! I can deal with giving her a feed a couple of times in the night so no designs on a full night’s sleep, and I know she is still little, but I really need to crack getting her to go to sleep a bit quicker.

We’ve tried gradual retreat, but she just will not lie down and sleep with me in the room (I gave it 2 hours several times), I won’t consider CIO, and a very half-hearted attempt at CC resulted in her getting more hysterical when I went in to comfort her after an allotted amount of time and left again. PUPD doesn’t work as she doesn’t get upset if I’m there, she just also doesn’t go to sleep - so no reason to pick up which I suspect would just stimulate her more anyway.

What options do I have left?! We can’t continue like this, I’m back at work and struggling, and DH works away a lot so not much chance to hand over and get a break even though he is willing and supportive. Just not sure what else to try...

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Madbee · 11/07/2018 19:51

Anyone have any ideas? Breaking point seems not far off...

OP posts:
glasshalfsomething · 11/07/2018 19:54

If I remember correctly 9 months is a bit of a bugger for sleep routines. It does pass, I promise.

Would you reconsider controlled crying? We used it and it worked for us!

userabcname · 11/07/2018 19:58

I would juggle nap times around and maybe try earlier wake ups? I'm not really one for sleep training and my 13mo used to be a terrible sleeper but since his 1st birthday has improved hugely if that gives you any hope! What got me through was lots of early nights for me - I basically went to bed when he did and naps / lie-ins at the weekend while DH watched him. Good luck!

Madbee · 12/07/2018 10:54

Thanks both, I must say I gave CC another fleeting thought last night, if things don't improve I will give it a go after we have been on holiday in a fortnight.

Katniss, thanks - there's not much I can do about naps as I'm at work and she sleeps when in the car or pushchair with childminder or on our way home. It doesn't seem to make much difference when she sleeps in the day though, unless it's really late. I think you might be right about going to bed earlier - I'm so precious about my wind-down time in the evening, but it's no good if I'm not sleeping as well!

OP posts:
glasshalfsomething · 12/07/2018 14:09

Would you not rather try before holiday so she sleeps better and you can relax more?

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