5 months old addicted to night feeds

[YummySushi]

I’m so sleep deprived

For the past month, baby has been waking up every half an hour from 3 am onwards. I resorted to putting him right next to me as I just keep my breast out and he sucks while I sleep.

He is teething. So might be why.

But I don’t know what to do anymore .. wish I can get better sleep

This started when he was 4 months. Is this sleep regression that people talk about ?? When is it over ?

It's absolutely normal for 5 month olds to night feed.

Co sleeping is a good solution.

I expect you know the safer co-sleeping guidelines, but just in case, this is from the NCT:

If you co-sleep with your baby, here is some guidance about sleep safety:

Make sure your baby can’t fall out of the bed or become trapped between the mattress and the wall.
Keep your baby cool by using sheets and blankets rather than a duvet.
Ensure bedding does not cover your baby’s face or head.
You shouldn't co-sleep with your baby if you or your partner smokes (even if you don't smoke in the bedroom).
You shouldn't co-sleep with your baby if you either you or your partner has drunk alcohol or taken drugs (including medications that may make you drowsy).
Always put your baby to sleep on their back rather than their front or side.
You should never co-sleep if you smoke, drink or take drugs
Babies don’t need a pillow until they are at least a year old. They should also be kept away from parents' pillows.
Never risk falling asleep with your baby on a sofa or armchair. If you’re feeling really tired and think you may fall asleep with your baby while feeding or cuddling them on a sofa or armchair, move to a bed (keeping in mind the safety guidelines above) or, if possible, ask your partner, friend or family member to look after them while you get some rest.

www.nct.org.uk/parenting/co-sleeping-safely-your-baby

Yep sleep regression. It lasts until the next sleep regression. How would you feel about introducing a dummy?

It does sound like the 4 month sleep regression. It does get better, but you do have to ride it out unfortunately.

Babies can’t get ‘addicted’ to anything by the way, he’s just looking for comfort from him mum. He wants closeness and breastfeeding gives him a feeling of security.

He will eventually drop the night feed, but given that it's normal for DC to night feed at this age, the key is your sleep, not his. What can change so you can get more sleep?

Do you have a partner? When are they home? Can they get up in the morning and give you half an hour extra? Are you getting both lie-ins at the weekend while you're doing night wakings? (If not, change this!). Can you carve out time for a nap?

Trying to solve the puzzle "how can I make my baby sleep through" is going to drive you mad, you're fighting nature!

How can you get more sleep while you're feeding your baby at night, this is the puzzle you need to solve.

Breastfeeding gives not only comfort, but nutrition, hydration and medicine.

He could be needing any or all of these.

But I feel like I’m the only one facing this. Most kids wake up at night it seems but he doesn’t seem to stop waking up every half hour or so. Can I move him to his own bed? My husband is struggling to wake up to work and I feel cruel to not let him Cosleep because he wants comfort

Thanks all for ur replied.

Sleep regression is really tough op. The only things that helped were introducing a dummy, catching up on sleep during the day (if possible) and having a lay in when dh was off of work. It'll pass , try to stay calm and grab sleep and rest when you can.

I totally feel your pain. My DD woke up around 1am and wouldn't go back to slee (just fed or cried) pretty much every night until we did some milk sleep training around 7 months. Cosleeping didn't work for us, she wasn't interested. We were broken. You poor poor thing. Hope things turn around soon.

OP it's brutal, you said it just seems to be you..i promise its not

I can remember sitting on my doorstep after putting ds1 back to sleep for the fourth time that night looking for other lot windows in the street just so i didn't feel so alone

Because I was severely sleep deprived and the whole world seemed to be asleep and no-one else seemed to struggle so much ,until I noticed my neighbour who had similarly aged children's upstairs light used to go on at the same time....it was a life saver that made me realise it wasn't just me and my baby going through this

The sleep deprivation is brutal and often minimised....but it does end I promise....focus on getting enough sleep yourself and try to ride it through....

Oh thanks everyone for replying. So is it normal that he wakes up every 45 mins ?? From 4am onwards :(. I think I didn’t develop many sleep association for him and just let him sleep at the breast.

For those of you who never used a dummy and were exclusively breastfeeding and never did sleep training , when did the regression fix ?

Yummy I do think it's 'normal' but it's definitely at the extreme end of it. My ds2 was like this. He got a lot better at 6 months when I let him sleep on his tummy. Might that help, once your ds is old enough?

We did also sleep train at about 8 months, but between 6-8 months it had become loads more bearable just from him settling and staying settled better on his front.

Don't feel bad for finding this utterly awful. And you don't just have to put up and shut up either - if you're still finding it really hard going post 6 months you can look into some sleep training for your ds and although they're not going to work for every child, the likelihood is it will help. Knowing this really helped me in those early months when I was barely coping.

You need time to catch up. What do you have planned this weekend?

You need to plan a nice long nap! Not saying this is the solution, but even a bit of sleep will help you think clearer.

What can you change to get more sleep?

Can you go to bed earlier?

How about you and the baby sleep in a different room, just for now.

Then DH can be rested, and have no excuse not to get up with the baby in the mornings and let you get a bit more sleep.

What things in your daily routine are getting in the way of you sleeping, apart from the baby? Who's cooking dinner for example.

Remember this isn't forever, you can make drastic changes now and change back when your baby sleeps more.

e.g. your DH could grab himself food on the way home, you could eat before he gets back then he could just take the baby as soon as he gets in, so you can go sleep for a bit. Maybe not every day if you value eating together, but say 3 days a week while it's so tough?

Can your DH take a day off, to give you a chance to catch up on sleep?

This need to be taken seriously, you need a chance to catch up. What other ways could you get a chance to grab more sleep?

My husband sleeps in spare room if DS is having a bad night. PArtly as DS takes up about as much space as he would in a double bed, admittedly but so I can doze/ feed/ doze and DH gets a solid night.

It is normal for night feeds to feel like they're all the bloody time, especially about this age with the sleep regression and when they're starting to notice the world in the day so maybe don't feed quite so well

Is it the light mornings that are disturbing your LO? I’m finding the heat and light evenings/morning difficult to manage with my 6mo, even with blackout blinds and curtains.

She definitely finds it harder to settle post 5am and usually ends up in bed with me at that time.

That said she is starting to show some signs of beginning to self-settle so hopefully things will start to look up for you soon.

In the meantime can you co-nap during the day to get some rest/sleep? I’ve started doing this with DD rather than fighting to settle her in the cot for ages.

When does he go to bed at night? Can you go to bed at the same time, as boring as it is? That’s the only way I can cope.

It’s tough and I think a lot of other mums only talk about the one night their LOs slept through rather than the 13 nights they didn’t!

As PP noted it’s managing your own sleep and sanity at this stage. But you’re definitely not alone, we still have at least 3 night wakings still.

Hello, I agree with everything sleepingdragons and others have said. It is normal for what is still a very little baby, although for you it's very very hard to be at the extreme end of the 'bellcurve' of restless sleepers.
I had one who woke between every 1.5-45 minutes for months and months. Never more than 2-2.5 hours solid sleep for about 18 months. I got very good at feeding lying down and literally dozing through it, just go back to sleep. The breastfeeding releases hormones in both of you to help you sleep again.
A great tip which made a difference: DO NOT LOOK AT THE CLOCK, it will only stress you to see how short it's been since last feed.

Just accept this is going to be like this for a good while, and as suggested, juggle the other parts of your life to get sleep top up as much as is possible.
Have you also tried having DH sleep with the baby while you're in another room? It didn;t work for me, but some people find that if mother/boobs aren't in close proximity, they don't wake so much. Of course if it all kicks off you can go back in, but worth trying?

If he hasn't been using a dummy, introducing one now won't work. It's normal to feed during the night but at this age he should be going longer and longer periods. But be rest assured they do grow out of it. Sleep patterns change all the time.

This was the juncture where we moved LO to their own room. He was waking every 45 mins and I was pulling him out of his bedside crib to soothe and feed him. He was able to self settle in his own room and his sleeping went from strength to strength.

Hello,
Mine at 5 months slept in 45 minute increments.
Its half of a proper sleep cycle and they get there when they're ready.
That said I found focusing on a structured bedtime and nap times really helped get that 1.5 hours!
Try to get the 45min nap to roll into 1.5 hrs and you're nearly there :)

Also I moved him into his own room at 6 months (kept the room dark and snuck out after he was asleep then dashed back the moment he woke up in the morning)
It helped immediately.

It was a long slog but he became an excellent sleeper

Oh and a Gro anywhere Blind!

Block out every conceivable light source, I still use mine in summer now and he's four.

Your not alone. My ds is 5 and a half months and the night wakings and feedings are taking their toll I feel like I am running on fumes right now. I try to nap in the morning when he does but fed up of feeling exhausted all the time, but I felt like this with dd so just have to focus on knowing it will pass, it won't be forever. But your definitely not alone.

I'm currently going through exactly this with my 6month old. It's been about 3 weeks now. Started when he was unwell but isn't showing any signs of getting better. He wakes every 45 minutes crying and needs nursing back to sleep.

Prior to getting sick his sleep was reasonably consistent 8pm - 3am then a couple of wake ups until morning but he would never wake crying.

I'm setting him down in his cot for the first few times but we inevitably end up co-sleeping as it's the only way I can get a reasonable stretch of sleep.

I'm really hoping it's going to start getting better in the next few nights/weeks before I need to go back to work in August. I currently reading 'the gentle sleep book' for some inspiration/reassurance. Sleep training doesn't really appeal.

Might try getting him settled in his own room and see if that makes a difference too.

Sorry no real advice to give, but lots of sympathy! It can't last forever. Do let me know if you find any magic answers!!

DS2 woke every 45 minutes, every night, until just last week.

He's 2 years and 4 months.

Not to depress you or anything, but, even though it has been hell....we are coming out the other side and it is pure heaven

He's had the worst case of teething I've ever seen. Plus reflux with it. It's been crap.

But it will pass...

My first did this from day one and it was torture. I tried everything I could to get him to sleep and nothing worked. He eventually got better.

Second one went straight into a sidecar cot (I can't sleep if cosleeping) and he couldn't breastfeed, so bit different to you, but the biggest thing that helped me was just accepting that the night waking would happen... It really helped me stop stressing about it and I think that somehow helped him as well.
It was fucking rough, don't get me wrong, but it helped a LOT to acknowledge that there wasn't much I could do, and that it will end.

It will.. You're probably in the worst stretch right now, it will get better, I promise.

It's so warm at the moment as well, that really won't be helping.