9 months old STILL waking 2/3 times a night- time to do cc? what am I doing wrong?

[bmachine]

She has never ever slept through and has kept this pattern since around 3 months… im the only one out of my NCT group who has never experienced an uninterrupted nights sleep

-She wakes at approximately 00:00 , 03:00, 06:00

-She goes down for each of these no fuss after a quick feed (around 60ml-100ml of expressed milk)

-She is always put down awake for her naps/first sleep of the night

-She naps in morning and afternoon for about 1-1 ½ hours each time. I often have to wake her from these

-She eats three decent meals a day, snacks and a bottle (125ml) in the morning , late afternoon and x2 in the evening before bed ..she has never been able to drink more then 150ml max in one go hence the two bottles at night one before bath and one after

-She has no comforter in bed and we don’t use a dummy except at 6am to get her down again until 7:30

-She generally eats well and the last meal of the day seems enough to ‘last her’ eg today she had about 3 fistfuls of spag bol, a selection of vegetables and some greek yogurt/chickpea mush to finish…followed by around 210ml of expressed milk

Can anyone suggest if she seems ready to ‘sleep train’ I just get so confused as all the methods talk about self settling which she seems very capable of for naps and first sleep of night….so is she actually hungry or is this habit?

Any thoughts much appreciated

Your NCT group may be lucky ... or they may be bending the truth. Both of my DC were waking that number of times a night at that age and I know a number of other DC who were too. The problem is that, some are sleeping through, so you feel like a failure of yours isn't which means it isn't talked about.
I tried various things with my DC including controlled crying. Had some success with DC1 but a lot of heartache to get there and then she got a cold two weeks later and we were back to where we started; it was a complete failure with DC2 and just meant we'd had a few hideous nights of no sleep.

Both of mine were waking the same at that age. You can nightwean but I think for it to be humane you'd need your partner to do it. I wouldn't go from feeding three times a night to cc.

DD woke several times a night until well past her third birthday.

DS slept from 9pm to 6am most nights from 9 weeks.

All babies are different. Waking 2-3 times the night at 9 months is quite normal.

Baby is still tiny
Try not to compare
Sleeping through doesn't really happen for a while yet
Your baby needs you not to be left to cry

It will get better it's hard right now but also right now she's small, very small. Just go with it it'll all change again soon

Aaand shes just woken up..bango n time!

Thanks everyone for your replies…its made me feel much better. Yes, I think my NCT group have just been lucky in terms of sleepy babies so its good to know its not just me!

good advice to try and night wean before the more extreme cc..ill do some reading up on it tomorrow (is that when you water down milk gradually?)

Me and my bf often share night wakeups towards the end of week/weekends since I’m exclusively pumping (don’t ask!!) so I might aswell take advantage of the fact she takes a bottle

Thanks for sharing your experiences, I know every baby is different but with so many sleeping babies around me I was really doubting myself

She may well be waking because she's hungry. I think you're going to have to ensure she isn't before any of this will be successful. Most of the sleep trainers around here won't take a breastfed baby on until 1. They need to be eating properly in the day first. At 9 months I switched to formula at night (for the last feed) because it doesn't break down so fast. It also meant I could use the ready made containers so it only involved unscrewing a lid and plonking it in the bottle. I also introduced a comforter so that if she woke up she could snuggle it and go back to sleep without a bottle. I think Dr. Jay Gordon has a good website on night weaning.

We gently night weaned and replaced milk with water which stopped most night wake ups. At 12 months my DD still generally stirs once in the night and needs a cuddle before going back to sleep.

Honestly, that’s pretty good going for a 9 month old! I am sure when your nct group babies hit the 10 month sleep regression it will go tips up. Babies wake up for a zillion reasons, not just hunger, so night weaning night not be the magic bullet you are hoping for.

Don’t worry - in my antenatal all the ones who had good sleepers at the start had problems later down the line.

Dd2 nearly two and still wakes once or twice a night. Not because she’s hungry (but she’s a lot older and she was feeding at night still at 9 months) but for whatever reason she wakes and can’t get back to sleep so I help her settle again.
You’re not doing anything wrong. All babies and children are different. Your baby needs your help that’s all.

Your baby is normal, you're not doing anything wrong.
Thousands of threads on here and plenty of research says not sleeping through is normal until much, much older than 9 months, never mind 3 months.

I'll add that you never "have" to do CC or any sleep training. Adjusting expectations as a parent of what your evenings and nights will be like with a young child is very powerful in reducing stress levels. Many who've had two kids will tell you that the second time they were way more zen, made adjustments to their own schedules, and everyone was a lot happier. No distress for baby needed, just patience and some early bedtimes for you!

Thanks all, I really appreciate everyone taking the time to respond.

I guess I was a bit blinded by my immediate mum friends (two of which had done cc very young) and its reassuring to hear that its not only me up so many times a night….infact exploring this forum more seems to suggest I have it easier then many (until her next sleepless phase!!)

I think going forward I might research/try some gentle sleep training methods as i am back at work soon..... but if they don’t stick then not beat myself up about it and accept she still needs attention at night.

You arent doing anything wrong. What you’re describing is well within normal. It’s normal for them to sleep through and it’s normal for them to wake.

Ds didn’t sleep for more than an hour a go for 18m. We tried everything. Nothing worked. Then suddenly he got it and has slept through ever since, barring very rare illness/nightmares.

Everyone I know who has done cc has had success with it, then a relapse when the child is ill/moves rooms/is on holiday/has any kind of change.

Sleep is as much a developmental skill as walking and talking is. You can encourage good habits but they’ll get it when they get it.

Yeah, sorry, I'd kill for only 2-3, and so predictable.

DS just turned one.

My ds didn't sleep through the night till primary school. He was wanting feeding on a regular basis Day and night but never ate a full meal ever until much older. Not much help though! But commiserations

We night weaned DD at 11 months (she was breastfed so just stopped but may have watered down bottles). It was relatively straightforward. She cried the first night but we cuddled etc and was awake lots night 2 & 3 and then slept through 50% of nights. I think for DD it was habit/association, although we were putting her down awake at the start of the night. We probably could have done it earlier but waited until it was right for us e.g. not at the same time as me returning to work. Whatever you decide, don't feel pushed into something that doesn't feel right for you.

Sorry, just realized your lo is only 9 months, that's quite young to sleep through the night. My dd did by that age but I think that wasn't very common.