Five month old needs settling up to a dozen times between 7 and midnight

[mamarug]

My DS goes down pretty easily after his bath and feed at around 7pm but then often needs to be settled back to sleep every half hour or so until around midnight. He doesn't actually wake up (his eyes are always closed) but he cries hard and if we don't go in to him immediately he gets worked up into a real state. He stops crying the minute we pick him up. Sometimes it seems he is bothered by wind but other times there doesn't seem to be any reason for the disturbance.

Has anyone else had a similar problem or have any idea how to solve it? He falls asleep in his cot, but I stay with him and sing to him and rub hs tummy until he falls asleep. Is it possible that because he doesn't know how to fall asleep on his own he doesn't know how to put himself back to sleep when he comes into light sleep?

Any thoughts or tips very gratefully received!

your ds may just be suffering with wind or could it be teething.
he is probably used to you going to sooth him every half hour! it may be helpfull to leave him everyother time and increase the time gap between going in, i will be hard but it should get easier good luck

Sounds like DS at that age (well since he was 3months) although he would wake up fully quite quickly. HV suggested that he couldn't fall asleep alone and I should do CC (I didn't though) turned out he has silent reflux (he also got very angry while feeding and didn't like lying on his back). Has it been going on for a while or is it a new thing?

Or it might just be that he can't fall asleep on his own yet....

Thanks elsie and gill. I agree that he's probably getting used to me going it to settle him every half hour - haven't been brave enough to leave him without going straight in but am getting so tired that I might soon be able to!

He's always needed settling pretty frequently but over the last month it's become much worse in the hours up until midnight. Before that he'd need settling every hour or so and then wake ever hour - two hours after midnight. Recently he's been sleeping from midnight until around 5am.

He's always been a really windy baby (both ends) so maybe this is what's bothering him. Just seems odd that he can sleep after midnight but not before. I did wonder whether he had silent reflux as he sometimes gets really upset during feeding, but this has improved recently.

mamarug, I'm going through the exact same thing. I really feel for you, you must be shattered and it's the no knowing what the problem is that is the killer.

I've tried everything in the book to stop what's going on and eventually the HV suggested weaning him. I tried it yesterday for the first time an I managed to get 5 hours of broken sleep last night - accordingly, it worked a treat and both he and I are much happier today. I'm not suggesting this is the answer for you, as weaning is a big step, but it might be worth a try. I'm not counting chickens though, he might be rubbish tonight!

You say he is windy, have you tried Dr Browns bottles? They worked a treat for DD who was windy also.

It's really hard to find the right balance in respect of going in when he cries. You want to rush in there to nip it in the bud before he cranks up and then wakes himself up don't you - but then you wonder if you are spoiling them by doing it. Go with what feels right.

Hang in there, I know it's really hard but in the meantime get all the help you can get and try and get some sleep where you can.

DS started bad and got worse too. If he is taking less food in the night (if it is reflux) then that might be a reason why he sleeps better later?

It may well not be reflux, especially if he's feeding better, and I don't want to sound like I'm pushing it! but if you are concerned that it is you could try talking to your GP and trying Gaviscon, it doesn't stay in their system and you could see if it helps? TBH I'm paranoid because I feel guilty that DS wasn't diagnosed for so long...

When to go into them is really hard, DS will settle himself sometimes now, but he didn't really start doing that until after he passed the 6 month mark.

Good luck with it, hopefully it will get better

but, we didnt put either of our babes down, till they were tired...at that age. They are now into a 7pm routine, it just came naturally. Needs must in our house

Thanks everone for your posts.

Palmwoods, sorry to hear you're having similar problems Funnily enough, DS has only started doing his 5 - 6 hours of unbroken sleep since I introduced solids about a week ago. Might just be coincidence, but either way I'm so happy to have had more than 2 unbroken hours for the first time since he was born. Hope you have another good night tonight

Wolfgirl, I did wonder whether he was ready to go down for the night at around 7.30 but he always seems so shattered by then and falls asleep pretty easily so I assumed he was.

Sounds like it might be mild reflux. Ds has it quite seriously (is on heavy duty meds) and often shows the same pattern. Ped told me that reflux tends to have cycles, so it's normal for it to be worse at certain times.

If it is that, it might help to put him to sleep on a wedge, so he is not flat on his back. Seems to help my ds. I wouldn't stop going to him - if you leave him flat it would only make it worse.

My DD can be like this but then again she can go to bed at 7 and not hear a peep until midnight. Sometimes she falls asleep on her own, other times it takes me laying (!) in her cot with her. Sorry, don't have any answers I'm in a never ending search for them myself but just to let you know you're not alone and hopefully it isn't permanent.