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Sleep

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Original poster

What's wrong with lap napping?

45 replies

ClareBos · 22/05/2007 13:21

Hello sleepy people
My 6 month old ds sleeps through the night (please don't throw things - it's not my fault, I think it's the soya formula). He does wake up sometimes, but only when hungry. He settles like a dream at 7pm and usually gets us up 11-12 hours later. However, he hates to nap during the day. And I mean he screams and kicks and cries and has taken to punching me if I even look like I might put him in his cot. This means he spends most of the day in a terrible mood and is prone to screaming fits for no reason. If he does sleep it's for 30 minutes max. And he wakes up rubbing his eyes and burying his head in my chest. By 7pm he's usually hysterical.
I've tried CC, but never, ever again - worst weekend of my life. And I'm currently trying NCSS (which is a joke because we've all cried since we started doing it). And yet there is a tiny tempting light at the end of the tunnel, he will have lovely long daytime naps on my lap (only discovered this last week when he was sick and I wouldn't let go of him).
So here's the question (finally) what's wrong with letting a baby sleep on your lap during the day? Does it have a bad affect on the littlun? Would it mess with his great night time routine? I know my Mum did lap napping with me and I can honestly say I've never had any problems with sleep, I'm neurotic, but that's not really related. I'm off to ask the hv about it now, although the access we get to hvs here is really limited and she does have people with real problems to deal with.
I look forward to your insights. Mumsnetters helped me diagnose ds's lactose intolerance, I have faith in you guys.

OP posts:

amazonianwoman · 22/05/2007 14:28

If he sleeps well at night and you are happy snuggling with him on your lap during the day then there's absolutely nothing wrong at all

DS (only 10wks) sleeps pretty well in his cot at night (still wakes 2-3 times but he's only young) and for his morning nap, but not for others, so he's fast asleep on me in his sling right now - and it hasn't affected night routine

shonaspurtle · 22/05/2007 14:31

Ds (6mo) also takes most of his daytime naps on my lap. He won't sleep for nearly as long in his cot. I'm a bit concerned about the habit as well as it would be nice to have the time to go about doing stuff. I use it as an excuse to come on here though - am indeed doing it now!

Psychobabble · 22/05/2007 14:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MegBusset · 22/05/2007 14:34

DS (12 weeks) is asleep on my lap as I type this! He will nap in bouncy chair or pram but only for 30 mins. But if he falls asleep while bfing, will go for up to 2 hours on my lap. I know it's not the 'done thing' but I haven't the heart to wake him! He's a light sleeper so transferring to cot is not an option, he'd wake and I'd have tired, upset baby on my hands...

MegBusset · 22/05/2007 14:37

Should add, he can sometimes be hard to settle in crib at night (took an hour yesterday) and I wonder if lap-napping is getting him too used to sleeping on me. BUT once asleep at night, he is pretty good and only wakes 1/2 times for food, then usually resettles without a fuss.

tinymum · 22/05/2007 14:38

Mine used to do that. I loved it.....I used to chill out, watch a film, chat on the phone....

these days they hardly let me cuddle them, let alone fall asleep on my lap. (cry)

Why do they have to grow up???

WotzanameOoohhhjarmaflip · 22/05/2007 14:43

I think it sounds nice to let your ds nap like that. Whatever suits you both, if it works, well done.

I would love to have nap lap...yes tinymum - they soon are too big (my dcs are at school - weep).

Mumpbump · 22/05/2007 14:46

I don't think there is anything wrong in particular. Ds often used to go to sleep on me if we were out and about during the day. It's only a problem when you want to get on and do stuff whilst they are asleep!

popsycal · 22/05/2007 14:48

my 2 year old has just woken from a nap on my lap
he is under the weather and loved snuggling up
do whatever is right for you both

WotzanameOoohhhjarmaflip · 22/05/2007 14:49

Do you think I could force my 10 year old to snuggly and snooze off later

hoxtonchick · 22/05/2007 14:55

both mine slept on my lap. lovely. great excuse for you to sit down too!

Original poster

ClareBos · 22/05/2007 17:20

Wow, overwhelmingly in favour of lap-napping then! The hv said it was a bad thing and shouldn't be encouraged . Typical, I still have to make a decision for myself.

Thanks for your advice everyone.

OP posts:

Psychobabble · 22/05/2007 17:41

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

saralou100 · 22/05/2007 17:49

ds1 lap napped...he grew out of it in his own time.. now at 2.3 he goes to sleep on his own (literally, i was in the kitchen the other day, came into the living room and he'd curled up on the floor - fast asleep)

so no harm done to him!!

gingerninja · 22/05/2007 18:42

Clarebos, I'm encouraged by your thread as I'm in a bit of a battle with DD to nap anywhere but on my lap. she will nap for ages on my lap and 30 mins elsewhere. We however have night time issues too and she doesn't sleep and we co-sleep so napping seems my smallest hurdle. However, I'm due to go back to work and do worry that she won't be able to sleep without me so I'm trying to wean her off it. (With very limited success)Also, I think I might be able to regain a little sanity if during the day I had a break where I could either do some jobs or do something for me.

I don't have any answers really. I love it but wish I hadn't made a habit of it.

kiskidee · 22/05/2007 20:23

Good God. if a child cannot nap in his mother's lap then where in the world would he be allowed to just fall asleep.

what a lovely way to show unconditional love. keep it up if you want to/can. it is good for both of you.

kiskidee · 22/05/2007 20:24

i was going to warn you not to go to the hv but then i noticed it was too late.

ScottishThistle · 22/05/2007 20:26

My first charge lap-napped (because I adored him & had nothing better to do!), didn't do him any harm!

tubismybub · 22/05/2007 20:28

ah if he's happy on your lap and you don't mind then stick with it. It's such a lovely thing hold them while they sleep, even now that DS is 2 I still occassionally like to hold him on my lap while he naps. Trust me you'll miss it when it's gone

katierocket · 22/05/2007 20:29

gingerninja - I could have written your post, we have very similar issues. I actually don't think the lap napping has caused night time problems, I genuinely think it's down to temperament. If it's the only way they will sleep in the day (which it is for my DS2) then it is very frustrating.

morningpaper · 22/05/2007 20:30

mmmm lap-napping is lovely

and you can watch telly

I mean gaze on your lovely baby with adoration

Hassled · 22/05/2007 20:33

My kids are all much older now but I used to "lap-nap" (didn't realise it had a proper name ) and it was great - apart from anything else it forced me to sit down and do nothing except read a book or watch TV via subtitles when otherwise I would have felt obliged to use that time to wash the floor/iron etc etc. It was a bit of "me" time and kept me sane - go for it!

amazonianwoman · 22/05/2007 21:14

Broad sweeping statement, but do any HVs come up with any useful/realistic/common-sense/productive advice??? I think they should all go en masse to India/Africa etc and watch babies being reared there...

My HV's latest was to tell me that I should let my then 4wk old DS just cry it out because he wouldn't settle for naps in the day, even though crying for just 5mins if stuck in the car made him so hot & sweaty that his clothes were soaking wet...

maisym · 22/05/2007 21:16

my lo's never had naps in thier cots but in my arms whilst I carried them around.

dinny · 22/05/2007 21:17

Both my two only ever really slept in day if fell asleep on me. Just have a good book, glass of water and phone within reach and all is well and calm.

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