Help my 2month old will not sleep!

[bria]

My 2 m old has difficulty sleeping in the day and cries out of frustration - the less sleep she has the more she cries - I have tried everything I can think of - cuddling her, leaving her alone, giving her a warm bath, massaging her, bouncing her, singing to her (makes her cry even harder!)she falls asleep only for moments at a time - the only things that works are the sling and the breast - but I now have terrible back ache and she wakes up when I try to burp her after giving her the breast! please help I am frantic!

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Bria, if your baby is sleeping peacefully I don't think there is any need to burp her. She'd let you know if she had any wind. HTH

Agree - no burping needed. BF babies usually don't need to be burped.
Could she be uncomfortable physically ? A friend of mine had a very whingy 3 monthsold baby (and we use to really wonder how she did it with her baby crying most of the time).... a week later when we saw her at our next get together, baby was very happy.... she had brought her baby to an osteopath (yes Bloss ) and he had "done" something to her.... according to the mum - her DD was completely different afterwards and she had regretted having weighted so long.

Bria, have you read Jan Parker's tips on mumsnet today? She makes some very good points.

Agree with not burping, I have a seven week old myself and he lets me know if he has wind. If he comes of the breast sleeping I just try to put him down. If you are worried you could slightly raise your baby into a slightly upright position but no back rubbing etc, if she has wind it may just come out.

If there's no other eason she's not sleeping (colic?) then you could always use a dummy. It may make her also start to need a dummy at night (as my dd now does) but better a dummy-addicted than a sleep-deprived baby! Also how about taking her for a little ride in the pram?

My youngest cried an awful lot when she was tiny but she slept quite well at night. It turned out to be a milk intolerance with her and she changed overnight when we went on to a soya formula. Although this might not be the case for you a food sensitivity would be worth considering especially if she tends to have worse spells which could be attributed to something that you have eaten. Please speak to your HV before making any major changes to your own diet though, I wouldn't want my experiences to deprive you or your baby of essential nutrients.

Alternatively, it could just be that she hasn't worked out how to go to sleep by herself yet.

My breastfed babies needed burping. Heck, 9m old DD still sleeps with a pillow under her mattress.

Anyway... have you tried long but gentle walks with baby in the pram, bria?

My ds was similar at that age - with him it was a sign of reflux - does your daughter posset (sick up milk) a lot? He was breastfeed and never really wanted burping, just woke up a few moments after falling asleep and screamed.
We found ds slept best at an almost upright angle, ie. in a 'bouncy' chair or pushchair, upright in the sling or in a tilted cot (put bricks under the legs at one end).

Hi!

Mine was like that (she is 8 months old now). From the very beginning she didn't want to be put down, started screaming straight away. She didnt have any naps either. THe only way she could be quiet was to feed her all day (I breast feed as well). So I did. At about 3 months old she started getting into a routine. Now she still wakes up once at night for a feed. I know it is exausting. No advice here. Just be brave and good luck!

I agree with not burping her.

Lots of sympathy - I remember mine being a bit like that, too. I used to walk around with her in a sling until felt my legs were going to give up. One thing is that I sometimes left her in the sling, lay down, and she stayed asleep on my tummy whilst still in sling. I know that face-down sleep isn't really a good idea, but at least she got some, and I was very much around. I tended to wait untill she'd woken up to burp her, but in retrospect she probably slept for a shorter time because of this - but at least she slept. And eventually she slept better. Fresh air certainly helped, lots. She'd sometimes nap better if I'd put her in sling and walked her around outside. Sorry I can't think of anything more properly helpful. Good Luck!

thanks to everyone for the advice. FrancesJ, did the use of the sling have any long term affect on your daughter's sleep pattern? Bloss in response to your question, she feeds approx every two hours day and night - also she will stay in the sling all day quite content - if I would let her -but could I possibly be storing problems for later?

Hi Bria, I really don't believe in this storing up problems for later stuff. I think babies change all the time and a two-month old has completely different habits from an eight-month old. Go with what works is my advice. If a sling gives you some peace, use it. If a dummy makes your baby happy, use it. Don't worry about the future, that will sort itself out. Of course, I didn't believe a word of this when my ds was 8weeks, but I do now!

bria, our dd was like this. We found that taking her out in the car helped enormously, as did the pram and a vibrating bouncy chair (by Mamas and Papas, available from Tesco on-line.) Our dd is also very sucky and loves her dummy - they are a marvellous invention. I agree with aloha- babies change all the time so don't worry about setting bad habits or whatever, just do what it takes to get you through. Our dd is now 5 mo and sleeps very well, if at odd times! Things will get better, and you will wonder at how quickly the time goes (I didn't believe it either, but it's true!) The book, 'The No-Cry Sleep Solution' by Elizabeth Pantley is v. good, you can buy it from Amazon.

Good luck!

It didn't seem to affect her sleep patterns, Bria (when she eventually developed some), although she's never been much of a daytime napper, I have to say (though as a baby she did settle really well at night, on her own, from quite early on). Like Aloha and Ionesmum, I'd say don't worry too much about long-term patterns at this early age - time enough for that when they're older and wanting to play at 4.30 every morning (groans). You too can then experience the joy of having seventeen cuddly bears and one tot land on your tummy as dawn rises.....

Bria, at 2 mo. my ds slept much less than the books said he should. Luckily he didn't cry much... just wanted to eat and eat and eat and like Lilia I just ended up feeding him all day and night until 6 mo. when I went on strike and cut out the night feeds. I found that the only way to get him to sleep during the day (and even at 19 mo. it is still the best way) is to put him in his buggy and wheel him around (cobblestones work the best). In retrospect, he did a lot of possetting and maybe the being upright was the most comfortable for him. Anyway, to reiterate what everyone else has said, DO NOT WORRY about setting patterns for the future at this age...they change over and over every few days/weeks/months. And even now at 19 mo. if I let my dh put him to bed too often, he starts refusing to go to sleep without having his hand held for 20 min. and then it takes me only a day or two to retrain him.

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Thanks to you all for your advice, I feel 1000 times better! maybe a little silly for panicking but as you can imagine, it's been a living nightmare especially as there seemed to be no-where where I could get help or advice, my HV is useless and smiles at everything I say. Can you believe that I have five sisters - none of them have experienced this with any their kids! (13 nieces and nephews in total!) My mum also did not experience sleepnessness with any of us! Thanks to you all once again - this was my first visit to this site - and I would certainly recommend is to anyone with a parenting dilemma!

One more thing, I didn't use one but two of my friends swore by those electric Graco swings, which encouraged long peaceful sleeps apparently. Horribly expensive but quite often for sale second hand (loot?). I think at that age, if you do keep her awake for two hours (as Bloss says) she will probably sleep for a bigger chunk at the end of it. My other bit of advice is to get out as much as you can - pushchair rides, car journeys etc seem to induce sleep and if not, at least you are doing something instead of just sitting there praying for her to drop off. I used to get in the car and head for cafe Rouge where, usually he would be asleep from the car and I could have a coffee. I can't believe you've never had a sleepless child in your family! Good luck!

bria - a little tip one of my friends passed onto me was when you are laying the baby down in cot/whatever, to place your palm gently, but quite firmly across their chest as you do so (takes a bit of practice) and only release the pressure after they've been lying down on their back for a few seconds...I thnk it helps to cushion the 'shock' of not being in your arms any more and certainly worked with my dd when she was very sensitive to any change in her environment.

Bria I empathise enormously. At 2 months I assumed dd was a 'special' baby. ie: would always only have about 8 hours sleep in 24. I thought I would lose my identity and my life as I struggled to look after my little weirdo. I'm happy to report that at 9 months she is now sleeping more like 13 hours out of 24. I'm not surprised you're frantic, but as she gets used to the world things should improve. If you can avoid always rocking her to sleep do.