Help! Bedtime and sleep schedule problems

[Keetzy50]

Trying a sleep routine to prevent my little girl (12 weeks) from being overtired by the time bedtime comes. Thought it was working or atleast showing improvement but went to pot for the last few nights. Let me explain our typical day in this new routine...

Wakes up at 7am, feeds at 730. At 830/845 she will sleep for 30 mins and then wake up, I try and let her self soothe and go back to bed but then she starts to get upset after 5 minutes. By this time I've gone to see her and try and shhhh and read a bit of her book as I do as a naptime ritual.

I end up having to abort the nap and take her downstairs as I think maybe she isn't tired and she wants to be played with or in her play gym. Not having it whatsoever and eventually after a tearful and long ordeal, I have to feed her after 2.5/3 hrs which I feel is a comfort feed as generally she goes for longer than this.

Her lunchtime nap is supposed to be 2hrs which she now does, with gaps in the middle when she wakes, cries for a few mins then self soothes. In the afternoon, she will have a little cat nap around 4pm but appears irritable for the remainder of the time she is awake. Gina Ford, baby sleep expert suggests that babies at this age can go from lunchtime nap to bedtime without an another nap, alright then, good luck!

Also it is supposedly advised not to let baby sleep after 5pm which sometimes she does in car seat as have to pick up husband up at 530pm. Altogether one hour in the car and maybe 20 mins of this asleep. Get home for around 6pm then try and give her bath then bottle and bed.

Tonight, we put her down to bed and tried to read her a book while she is in her crib. She was crying but sometimes we read then shut the door and after 5 minutes drifts off to sleep. Tonight she cried for 10 mins which turned to hysterical crying. We got her out of the crib and took her out of the room, she continued to cry so we fed her a few ounces to soothe her. We then winded her and tried to put her to sleep and had no luck again. We took her out again, held her until she calmed down, then put her down with white noise and finally she fell asleep. Her movement in her crib remains unsettled two hours on also.

We hate seeing our little girl get so upset and really need some advice on where we are going wrong. Thanks!

Sorry for war and peace!

Put the books away and don't worry about how she should be doing this and that. Babies are all different. Regular naps are important at this age, some babies are lighter sleepers and don't do more than one sleep cycle at a time. This improves over time. Going for a walk in the pram can encourage a longer nap.

Probably be less stressful for you if you just follow baby's cues for feeding & sleep and she will work her own routine out. 3 hours between feeds at that age is fine, maybe she's waking/unsettled because she's hungry?

If she is having a little nap at 5 she won't want to be in bed at 6. I would ignore all the books and just put her down when she's sleepy.

She's only 3 months old! It's way too early to be in a proper routine. She should be sleeping in the same room as you. Reading to her is probably not going to make any difference at all.

She should be able to sleep when she's tired. My baby is 2 months old and she goes to bed when we do and sleeps so well. She naps when ever she needs as well.

Try and relax a bit!

Oh goodness 12 weeks is very young still to be in a routine. My DS didn’t get anywhere near learning to self sooth until he was 6-7 months. Take Gina with a pinch of salt never having had kids herself. Lots of what she advises is fine but pick and choose what suits you and don’t put so much pressure on yourself for your baby to follow ‘the rules’ good luck! Sounds like you’ve got a really positive basis to work from -
Follow her cues a bit more. We tended towards a 2/3/4 sort of day - naps 2 hours after waking then 3 then bedtime 4 hours after that IYSWIM

Thanks ladies, going to do what works for little girl rather than a routine for now. She is a good sleeper at night at the moment, it's just the putting down. She sleeps in our room at all times. She used to sleep anywhere but she is so alert and inquisitive that she doesn't nap properly so that's why she moved into dark room during naps aswell. This has been the only real benefit. Just put her down for her first nap of day. Wish me luck :)