Should I try CC now?

[Laura032004]

DS2 is nearly 11m old. He is exclusively bf (won't take a bottle or a dummy). He's currently fed to sleep (which can be quick, or take ages depending on how he's feeling), but isn't a problem. Once asleep, I transfer him to his cot (in our room). This is usually at about 8pm. He then wakes around 2-hrly through the night. I usually do the 10pm feed before I go to sleep, and return him to his cot. For the next feed, he comes in the bed, I feed him lying down, and then we co-sleep / feed until morning.

He has two or three naps during the day, which are fairly predictable when we're at home, but can vary lots when we're out and about. He hasn't had chance to settle into much of a routine due to DS1's activities.

He also has reflux, so isn't really on any solids yet. The reflux has settled down a lot, but I've been reluctant to do anything about the sleep problems because of it - not being sure if he's waking due to the reflux or hunger due to lack of food in the day. However, a lot of the wakings are for a very quick (1 minute) feed, so I'm sure it's not hunger. It could be the reflux pain, but it's on such a regular schedule, that I'm thinking it's more habit.

Where do I go from here with him though? We did CC with DS1 (no idea what age though now), and it worked a treat. Three horrific nights, and he was sleeping really well.

He has hardly ever been settled to sleep by anyone but me - only on a couple of very desperate occasions has DH held him until he's cried himself to sleep. This has taken ages.

Things were a bit different with DS1 - the problem was getting him into his cot at all, so what would I do with DS2 - just leave him in his cot when he wakes up? Or do I go to him and reassure him, then leave him?

Please reassure me this will end one day

You must be completely exhausted...and in need of a full night's sleep. I did CC around this age with my DC but none of them had reflux. CC worked well for them.

When they woke I would leave them for about 5 mins, then would walk back in the room and stroke their back then leave again. I would leave them for 5 minutes longer each time. I think after 2 pretty dreadful nights they started sleeping through. We did have some relapses during periods of teething, illness etc. and I would start the cc process again.

All 3 are good sleepers now and don't seem too emotionally scarred by the experience

I think that you should express into a bottle. i did that, because my dd kept falling asleep when i breast fed in the night, and didnt fill herself up, so woke again about half an hour later. it was about 2 days of hell, but she eventually grasped the bottle, and it was so worth it!! i could let other people feed her, and at 11 months she could sit on the sofa, and hold the bottle herself so i could actually do things (go to the loo, wash face etc) and to do things with 2 hands again!!

Thanks both of you. I should persevere with expressing, but he won't tolerate anything at all in his mouth unless he is feeding or biting, so I'm a bit reluctant. I don't want him to get used to biting and getting milk at the same time, as DS1 did this at a similar age, and started biting me every time I fed him [painful emoticon ]

I am absolutely exhausted. DS1 only started sleeping though the night when I was quite heavily pg with DS2, so I haven't really had a good nights sleep in about 3 and a half years. Amazing what you can get used to isn't it!

Jesus!! thing is though, if its hungry enough, it will take a bottle. i know, easy to say when you havent had a baby screaming at you for god knows how many hours, and it would shut up in about 2 secs if you gave it the breast. i think you should arrange someone (not you) to start giving a bottle, because why would a baby want a bottle from you, when it knows if it cries for long enough it can have the breast? You sound like you need some rest, theres no way you are going to be able to do this if you are tired and stressed

We are in very much the same situation as you, but have split our problem into two chunks. First we tried to get him to self settle, which we did by putting him down and staying near the cot, gradually moving futher away. For DS3 this meant cuddling him within the cot sometimes and really being led by him. This took a few nights. When he did kick up a big fuss it was generally because he had wind.

However, this did not stop him waking at night and we are currently trying to stop the night feed. With our DS1 and DS2 we did controlled crying, but one of the sleep specialists says not to do this under a year now. So, tonight, we will probably leave DS3 in his cot after a short cuddle and stay in his room while he cries. The last two nights I have not fed properly but have cuddled to sleep.

Some more ideas to try then thanks. Will have to think about the cuddling to sleep. May have to get DH a bit more involved with the bedtime routine, as I find it very difficult to not just feed him.

Good Luck and hope it all goes well for you, wheh your having a bad time just think about what you can do when your not tied down to the baby! (sleep, shop, cook, and socialise) in short, be almost normall!

Laura, one thing I did which may have helped was spray my self liberally with strong perfume on a fleece I wear when I cuddle him. Hopefully that takes away the smell of milk (actually I think the first night he may have been crying because I'd sprayed rather too much of the horrible stuff [hmmm].