Toddler waking at 4.30am, sometimes earlier

[Puffinsandpangolins]

My son turns 3 in June and was poorly with a d and v bug last week for 4 days, was awake a lot at night and obviously we comforted him. Now he used to go into bed at 7 we could shut the door and walk out and we wouldn’t hear til 6.30. Now I sit with him for a few minutes and he drifts off but then wakes a couple of times in the night when he realises I’m not there and then seems to be awake for the day at 4.30. How on earth can I crack this? Potty training so he needed a wee and then I can’t get him back in his own room, bring him in with us which we have never done and he won’t drift back off. I’m scared it’s going to be like this forever. 5.30 I can handle, perhaps even 5 at a push but anything before that is ludicrous. Please help.

It won’t be forever. Feels that way but it won’t.

The birds and light start at 4.30 ish - could it be that? It wakes me but not dh.

Thank you, yes it does feel like it will be forever but I guess it won’t. Perhaps we have been spoilt by the good sleeping previously although it did take us nearly 2 years to get to that.

I guess it was thundery, dark wise the black out in the room are great, he said it’s too dark but there is a nightlight. Perhaps I just try and wear him out completely today and see if that works. One problem may be that he will want to doze off in the car today due to the early start. Didn’t realise quite how on edge all of this makes me feel. I appreciate you taking the time to reply to me.

Does he have a nap during the day? Have you got blackout blinds? Do you life him for a wee when you go to bed? Have you tried putting him to bed a bit later? Have you tried to re-establish a strict bedtime routine?

Just a few thoughts.

*lift

Everything surrounding sleep puts me so on edge so I can empathise! Have you tried talking to him about staying in his room for longer? Has he got a gro clock so he knows if the stars are still up he needs to go back to sleep/read books? The potty training is very difficult, my 4 year old is still in nappies at night so I have no advice there 😳 x

Yes we do have a strict bedtime routine, I suppose the only thing that has changed has him being poorly and vomiting etc and wanting me to comfort him in his room to drift off. I sit on a chair and have been edging it further out of the room with the aim of being able to get it out of the door but I’m not sure if the techniques used with a toddler, we used to go in when she was small for one minute, come out for two and then go in and comfort but that just leads to screaming blue murder now! I don’t know why I find it all so hard. Thank you for taking the time to reply. I haven’t lifted him before our bed time because I’m scared she won’t go back to sleep like when we have been doing it recently at 4am ish...

Just realised how negative I am...

The birds wake me up in the morning. I have an electronic fan on to create 'white noise' and block them out. Could that work for your DS?

Very young to go nappy free at night, could it be that that's waking him x

Thank you for replying. He does wear a nappy at night but I guess is starting to get trained to need the loo so wants to use that instead of the nappy...

I managed to put the chair right in the doorway tonight and sit on that, he drifted off in two minutes as so tired after the early start however I’m sure once he stirs and realises I’m not there...

Re lifting him for a wee. 10pm is very different to 0430, he will be so so sleepy and barely wake up, whereas if he stirs and feels he needs a wee in the v early morning he will find it harder to go back to sleep. If the weekend thing happens often I'd give it a try, we still take my 4.5yo. I'd rather that than be woken letter in the night, etc

Also I guess just talking about it in the day and being consistent at night should get you back on track

@puff does she has a nap through the day?

Ds is 3. He started sleeping through at about 2 1/2 but only because we cut his daytime nap out.

If he napped through the day. He would wake constant through the night or wake at daft o'clock like 4.30.

He is potty trained fully through the day but still wears a nappy through the night.
We've found it easier to put a potty in his room, so on a morning he takes his own nappy off and goes for a wee.

Could this be possible?

At that sort of age I think you can go straight to bribery. Get a gro clock and offer an instant chocolate button if you are not disturbed til after the sun comes up.

Gro clock helped us!
Sleep routine went out of the window when we moved house and then she got ill. Like you I tried the techniques I used when DD was littler and this time she just screamed and got furious.
Gro clock she loves and even if she wakes earlier (I set it for 6.30) she seems to be understanding that it’s not an option to get up, breakfast etc.
Also DH helping out a bit with settling at night was good, helped her to come out of the anxiety of just wanting mummy there all the time to drop off to sleep.
All the best and I feel your pain. 4.30 am wake up is no joke, even just once!!!