Is there anything I can do to make this better?

[SendHelpAndGin]

I've posted here a couple of times previously but baby and I are still really struggling with sleep

Baby is 18 weeks and was sleeping relatively well until around 10 weeks, but it's all been downhill since there. He now wakes every 2 hours or more over night, and the last few nights we've also had a 1/2 hour wide awake period in the middle of the night.

I'm exhausted and feel like I'm not doing a good job of being his mum, and he's waking up yawning and his little eyes look so tired all the time - I just want to help him sleep.

Naps aren't too bad, he normally has 3/4 a day, after about 90 mins/2 house awake time. Generally I can close the curtains, pop him in his cot in his sleeping bag and play his white noise and he'll settle himself off to sleep. He naps for anywhere between 45 mins - 2.5 hours with no real pattern to it, and naps don't seem to have any impact on nighttime sleep.

At night we have a bedtime routine - nappy free time, top and tail wash, feed and into bed where he also self settles with white noise on. He wakes frequently and will only be settled by a feed (we're breastfeeding), even if it's only an hour after the last feed. If I don't feed him he ends up wide awake and screaming and everything we do to try to settle him (sssh pat, rocking) just seems to wind him up. He's very difficult to settle back into his bed after a feed.

He feeds every 2-3hours during the day and generally takes a good feed, especially after a nap. He does have reflux and is on the highest dose of ranitidine, but he doesn't seem to be in pain when he wakes.

Sorry for the epic post - has anyone experienced this and found anything that has helped with nighttime sleep? I just want to help him get the sleep he clearly needs!

To be honest that doesn't sound that bad! You've almost got the opposite problem to me - we struggle with daytime naps.

How many hours of naps total in a day, and how many hours in an average night would you say?

Perhaps I haven't done a very good job of explaining it then. I think last night I got about 3 hours sleep in between constant waking, feeding, trying to resettle, and a wide awake period between around 12 - 2am. He's woken up this morning yawning and irritable and clearly needs more sleep. And we've been like this for the last 8 weeks.

Last night was something like this:

Asleep 7.15 - 8.40
Fed him, he fed to sleep and then woke back up while I was sitting with him up right in my arms because of the reflux, so fed him again
Asleep 9.15 - 10.45
Fed him back to sleep and put him back in his bed after sitting with him on me for a bit
Asleep 11 - 12
Woke up at 12, wouldn't feed, cried as we tried to rock, ssh pat him etc, eventually calmed down and went into his bed awake for a bit and fed to sleep a bit before 2
Asleep 1.50 - 2.45
Fed him back to sleep again
Asleep 3 - 4.50
Stopped looking at clock but had a few more wakings and resettlings before up at 7.30

As I say daytime sleep not too bad but it's like he's making up for what he's missing out on at night

Afraid it sounds pretty normal to me. My 7 month old is still waking every 2 hours. Would you consider co sleeping? I'm managing to cope with the amount of sleep as I don't have to get up to feed or cuddle in the night.

Hi Help and Gin,

As your baby isn't newborn now I think you'll get a lot of different opinions on whether or not they "need" sleep training, but I agree with previous posters, your baby's overall routine is well within normal bounds and actually the same as mine was for well over 18 months. I know how utterly exhausting it is. BUT the best advice I have is to stop clock watching, and use your boobs every time. They give you and the baby hormones to help you get back to sleep.
I see you say the baby has reflux, I assume this is why it's taking a long time for you to sleep as you're sitting up? Have you tried lyin down to feed him back to sleep at night (unless he's literally choking)? I know this is the opposite of general advice but I think nighttime sleep can be different for some babies and it works for them. It will certainly mean you should get better sleep if you can, as sitting up is an absolute killer.
The other advice I have is to just accept that this is normal and it will not last like this forever (despite me saying 18 months, we were lying down which made it much easier). I had two babies like this and the second time I stopped looking at clocks and worrying and it was way less stressful. I also every other night went to bed the same time as the baby so I regularly got a lot of hours, even if they were broken up. Makes a massive difference, and you still get time with partner if it's not every night.

Good luck