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10 yr old in my bed

10 replies

Pinkyhc · 13/05/2018 11:07

Hi I would like a bit of advice
My 10 year old boy has autism and is slightly immature to your average 10 year old.
I had an argument with my partner who doesn't live with us but stays occasionally.
My son every so often sleeps in my bed with me maybe once a month. My son last night said to my partner "I sleep with my mum at weekends"
My partner has reacted to that and one minute said he shouldn't be saying that as people will get the wrong idea and then changed it to sleeping in my bed at his age is wrong and not helping him with his insecurities. Then he said my son was purposely trying to annoy him. My response to this is , so what if he did he's a ten year old boy and he's a grown man why is he reacting, if he felt a way about him sleeping in my bed he should of come to me and asked me instead of saying to him you shouldn't be saying that and laughing at him because he slightly over exaggerated by saying I sleep with my mum at weekends
Autsitic children are very literal so him sleeping in my bed of a weekend every once in a while to him is sleeping with me at weekends.
My partner thinks he done it to wind him up where as I think he was probably a little bit jealous which I think for a child that is used to it just being us 2 alot of the time is probably normal and something he will grow out of.
My partner is now saying I'm making him out to be the bad person because I don't agree with what he's saying and I think he's allowed a 10 year old to annoy him when really he should of just asked and not let something so small get to him.
Am I in the wrong here please someone give me a bit of advice

OP posts:
Aprilmightbemynewname · 13/05/2018 11:10

If your dp really doesn't understand your ds is he worth having in your lives?

FortheloveofJames · 13/05/2018 11:28

Your DP sounds very immature. It’s a strange thing to take issue with. I agree with the above comment. Is this guy really worth it?

Foodylicious · 13/05/2018 11:31

If he's not invested in getting to know and understand your son, I think I wouldn't want to spend (waste) any more time on him.

Have you been together long?

BertrandRussell · 13/05/2018 11:37

Get rid.

LooseyInTheSky · 13/05/2018 11:56

This isn't the only issue he's had with your son, is it?

ElspethFlashman · 13/05/2018 12:00

Your DP is a troublemaker.

Pinkyhc · 13/05/2018 12:10

We've been together 5 years and we split last year for 4 months because I felt he didnt understand my son. The break did do us good and he admitted to being to harsh and put it down to different up bringings and the fact he has never had kids.
Sometimes he is so good with him and my son really loves him. He spends quite alot of time with him when hes around but some of the things he reacts to I find so childish but I do question myself if I'm over reacting.
If always thought that he is jealous of my son because we are so close and I'm all he's got.
I just needed to know if I'm being over the top or not because in his eyes he said I'm painting him out to be the bad guy and he's done nothing wrong.
How is a 40 year old man letti g what a 10 year old day yo him wind him up.
I said he should perhaps think about why my son said that to him and maybe he feels left out or jealous but he said that's for me to figure out and talk to my son about but if that was the case why not just not react to it and come to me.
I love him but this has really but me off and I find it so unattractive in man

OP posts:
Pinkyhc · 13/05/2018 12:11

No it really isn't

OP posts:
Foodylicious · 13/05/2018 13:26

Sadly it sounds like the kind of thing that will only get worse as your son gets older/bigger.

Pinkyhc · 13/05/2018 13:30

😔 I think you might be right
My son will always come first no matter what

OP posts:
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