Help! Newborn won't settle at night.

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FTM and we have a lovely 12 day old newborn (preterm born at 36 weeks). She is feeding well during the day (solely breastfeeding) and then has a small period of being awake before falling asleep beautifully. At night she will not settle after feeding. Sometimes she is latched on and feeding for up to an hour - hour and a half. Then I settle her down in the next to me and she won't stop grunting and flailing around. Before I know it she is crying and wants to be fed again. This continues all night. The only respite is if I bring her into bed with me and then she will sleep a little better.

I read she may be confused between night and day so we have been making sure it's bright and noisy during the day and I don't switch lights on or talk to her during the night.

Is this normal? I've tried swaddling at night but she kicks around so much it all comes loose. I've resorted back to a gro bag. Any advice on how to help her rest at night is much appreciated. My DH goes back to work soon and I'd rather not resort to him sleeping in a separate room.

Totally normal for new babies, night and day have no meaning to her for and won't for a while. She is working very hard to stimulate your milk production so that she has enough to grow. You just have to give up your own schedule for the moment and go with hers. It's not forever.

Oh great, I was worried I was doing something wrong or she wasn't getting what she needed from me.

What chocolate said. It's totally normal. You're best off going with it for now. Feeding at night is the best way to get your supply up. Co sleeping safely is a life saver. Also, Google the fourth trimester - full term babies are born too early really, let alone prem babies. This pic is really informative I think and helps you to understand the early weeks. It's not forever.

Read up on the 4th trimester, cluster feeding, and as much as you can of the kellymom feeding site.

You’re about to hit the 2 week growth spurt. Go back to bed and don’t move for at least a week.

They do work out day and night on their own eventually- called the circadian rhythm.

Mine wouldnt sleep until 3.30 am. I took my laptop upstairs and watched tv series on it during the night and slept when I could- whenever baby napped. I also sent bloke away and baby had his space on bed- made it easier to feed.

4 months on and still getting no sleep.

Baby goes to sleep 10.30/11 generally wakes after 5 hours and then doesn't go back to sleep.

Baby is in cot now though- been there since 11 weeks as feeds once or twice a night.

Yes all very normal. Cluster feeding is important for supply, however, if you are on your knees, perhaps express some milk so your partner can do a feed or 2 at night while you catch up on some sleep. It does get better - hang in there!

Thanks all. Good to know it's normal and I'm not doing anything wrong! Will persevere and stop trying to get her to sleep when I should just get her back on to feed again.

Completely normal, keep doing what you're doing. Maybe a night light or White noise machine may also help. Keep going with the bright lights in day and dark or very dim light at night to teach night and day and they'll learn

All my newborns have needed to sleep with me at night. DH in spare room. This bit doesn't go on forever.

I always kept it very dark and quiet at night, stayed lying down in bed no lights on or TV, doze while feeding. They get daytime/night time quickly.

Also make sure you wind your baby really well after feeding in the night. What you're describing sounds like trapped wind, so even though it's tempting to let them feed to sleep, you must wind them properly if you want the grunting etc to stop. Otherwise it all sounds very normal. Congrats on your new baby!

Ha, I'd advise the opposite the big benefit of breastfeeding is less disturbance at night, both of you can sleep while feeding so I wouldn't pick up and wind.

Depends on the baby- if we didn't wind DS, no end of grunting, leg thrashing and some times MASSIVE projectile spew.

But it eased by about 3 mo