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Sleep

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Original poster

2 year old mucking about at bedtime throwing dummy out

17 replies

Coldhandscoldheart · 09/04/2018 19:54

Pretty much as title. Goes into cot and then begins the long round of flinging her dummy out of the cot. Usually down the wall side which is hard for me to reach. Any ideas for knocking this on the head without taking the dummy away?

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Avasarala · 09/04/2018 20:00

Why don't you just stop using the dummy? I never used them so I really don't know how hard that would be or what she they should stop but 2 seems reasonable enough.

They all go through horrible sleep fighting stages, and all you can do is get through it.

Original poster

Coldhandscoldheart · 09/04/2018 20:02

Part of me thinks that might be the answer, but she’s had a lot of disruption lately and is really very attached to it. She only has it night times & nap times.
I’m not sure how long the screaming would last if we took it away 😨

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Avasarala · 09/04/2018 20:08

Do you have a load of spares you could keep in a drawer near her cot? Then just give her one from there when she throws one, and collect in the morning? Maybe make bedtime less of a hassle for you. And then come up with a plan to tackle the general bedtime problems.

Do you have a colour changing light or one that projects a changing light picture on the ceiling? They were the only things that worked when mine moved to their own room. Some kids love them but I know others who don't care for them at all so she might not be interested but worth a try?

Original poster

Coldhandscoldheart · 09/04/2018 20:39

A projector might help. We used to have lots of spares, but I moved her up a size in the hope we’d give them up soon, so only the two.
I think you’re right though, and this is probably a (very irritating) phase. I think we need to rethink our reaction to it. The temptation is always to say ‘well if you throw it out, you can’t have it back.’ And then of course, really, she’s too young to understand that, and anyway we can’t bear the screaming, so give it back.
Many thanks for answering, that’s helped me get a different direction on it.

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Aria2015 · 09/04/2018 20:45

My lo was doing this with a his ’can't live without’ toy. The way I knocked it on the head was to give him two warnings saying that id take it away if he did it again and then the third time I was very stern and took the toy and let him cry for it for 10 minutes. It was gut-wrenching but it was just long enough for him to really think it was gone for good. When I went back in and gave it back I explaining that if he threw it again then of take it and he's not thrown it since. I've never been one to let my lo cry but he was safe and in wasn't hurting him and it just made him realise that there are undesirable consequences to doing some things.

Whatififall · 09/04/2018 20:46

Spares. Lots and lots of spares. Go in, don’t speak to her, give her the spare dummy then leave. Repeat each time.
Even the time you spend rummaging for the dummy is attention so if you get spares you can just walk in and out. She’ll realise it’s not a game.

Original poster

Coldhandscoldheart · 09/04/2018 21:11

Yes, you’re right, she does see it as a game, earlier, she looked at me, gave me a wicked grin & threw it out, then giggled while I rummaged around for it.

OP posts:

Pennyweather · 13/04/2018 20:33

Attach it on a short ribbon to front of her sleeping bag? Or blanket/pyjamas, I guess, if she's not in a bag...

absolutelycrackers · 14/04/2018 19:18

Give her two .
If she throws them. Don't go and get them.
She'll soon learn her lesson

Starlight2345 · 14/04/2018 19:22

At 2 I would get rid of dummies . Do it when you can have broken sleep . They really do adapt very quickly. It has to be something you stick too though. Do the dummy fairy thing

GeorgeTheHippo · 14/04/2018 19:25

She's playing a game. Stop giving them back. Let her wait ten minutes and tell her you won't get it again. You can't be outplayed by a toddler.

silverbirches · 14/04/2018 19:28

She's having fun getting you to play 'fetch' so you need to put a stop to that, or she'll have you running ragged for hours.
Aria2015 has it.

Baubletrouble43 · 14/04/2018 19:29

one of my 16mo twins does this at naptime. I keep a pile of about 8 outside the bedroom and replace them without fuss. She hides them and takes great delight in it.

ButtMuncher · 14/04/2018 19:35

Although I agree with dummy fairy I don't think a 2 year old would grasp the concept apart from it's gone - they wouldn't understand perhaps the reward aspect of it.

I imagine we will have the same issue - my son is 19 months soon and he's started to throw things out of the cot if he's not tired enough - at the moment he will go down without too much fuss, but I know that soon we will have the defiance as he's started doing it if he isn't quite ready for sleep.

I agree with the multiple dummy thing - we have about 8 dotted around the cot. I know he won't give it up yet, and aim for around 2.5-3 to start the dummy fairy idea (so potentially xmas). But I'd definitely deploy the walking in, popping one on the mattress and walking out saying nothing. We are yet to have to deploy crying it out, or walking out with him crying, but I suspect it's on the horizon!

DailyMailFail101 · 14/04/2018 19:37

Go cold turkey on the dummy, I never used one so not sure if that’s possible but if it’s whats keeping her awake I would seriously consider it.

MrsG01081401 · 14/04/2018 22:42

Just get rid of the dummy. I never gave my 2 dc a dummy so don't have any personal experience but I think by 2 you should be getting rid of the dummy. The staff at my ds nursery really dislike dummy's being used as they inhibit their speech etc.

HappyGirl86 · 14/04/2018 22:47

When my little girl turned two I told her all about the dummy fairy and we put her dummies in a box and when we came home the fairy had left her a Peppa pig necklace and some chocolate and she was so pleased and kept talking about it. She asked for the dummy a few times but we just said "the dummy fairy has it remember and it's gone to little babies who need them" and she said "oh yes" and that was it. Within 2 days she never asked again. That was in Feb and occasionally now she sees a child with a dummy and she tells us hers went to the dummy fairy. It was the easiest thing I've ever had to deal with in my two short years of parenting! So glad we did it!

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