Advice needed!

[CLH84]

Hello, thank you for taking the time to read my post. This is my first time posting as I'm very new!

I need some tips/advice about my four month old daughter, at the moment she sleeps in our bed with us at night and breastfeeds/suckles on and off overnight. I'd really like to get her sleeping in her own bed but she seems to hate being put down in her crib. In the day we tried putting her down in the Moses basket downstairs for naps but she wakes up crying as soon as she's put down. So in the day we hold her while she sleeps and at night she's next to me. She will fall asleep on her pram or while in the car. If I lie her down while she's tired/sleepy but still awake she'll just cry her little heart out.

I started a bedtime routine, a wash & nappy change, into pjs, a story and in bed by 7-7.30, but I have to lie down in bed with her to feed her until she falls asleep and sometimes she'll feed on and off for ages so I'm lying with her that whole time. Me and my partner have no evenings at all at the moment and sometimes have to eat our dinner in bed! Also as the advice is to be in the same room as your baby while they sleep until 6 months, I just wondered what other mummies do? She had a choking/reflux episode where she went blue a few weeks ago, so I'd be terrified to put her on a monitor at the moment anyway.

I love sleeping with her but I only sleep lightly with her there so really feel like I need her to learn to sleep on her own at some point. Plus when I tell people she sleeps with us so many are horrified that I'm now ashamed to admit it!!
We are about to buy a cot with a good mattress in the hope that it will help.

Any advice would be brilliant!!

Thank you,

C

I feel your pain OP. My DD is just about 6 months now and she's slept badly since 3 months. I find that it's best to just do what works until it stops working and then try something else. DD used to only sleep on me after bf to sleep for naps unless in the car or pram. I decided one day to just put her in the pram and rock her back and forth in the house when my arms were aching from holding her and she fell asleep so now all naps are in the pram. Some might say that's a bad habit but I don't care because she's napping!

With regards to the evenings, I bf DD to sleep in our room (she sleeps in a next2me) and then DH brings me cups of tea while I go on MN usually. I sit with her until I want to sleep. It's a bit rubbish not having an evening together but it's such a short amount of time in the grand scheme of things it doesn't bother me too much.

I've found that the less I worry about sleep and the more I just let DD do what she needs to do the easier I've found it, although that's sometimes easier said than done!

Sorry I realise I haven't really given you any advice there, but at least you know you aren't alone!

Thank you, that does make me feel better.

I don't mean to sound like I'm moaning about not having evenings with my partner, I love being with my baby as much as possible and I know how lucky we are to have her. You're right, it's a short amount of time and if she's sleeping well and happy, then that's all that matters.

Thank you x

You don't sound like you're moaning at all! I feel exactly the same way, I miss evenings just spending time with DH, it doesn't mean we love our babies any less. I am looking forward to just being able to put DD down for bed and have an evening. As it is she's been so unsettled tonight that I've been upstairs with her for 4 hours now and I've had about 45 minutes sleep. Sleep deprivation is the worst!

I'm a bit behind you (baby is 10 weeks) but could have written the parts of your post about napping on me and not having an evening! Hopefully someone will have some advice for us

We used to co-sleep and still do on difficult nights like last night, but baby has got better about going into his sleepyhead in the Snuzpod. One thing that seemed to help was putting him into a sleeping bag or swaddle so his temperature stayed the same when transferred and he wasn't going down onto a cold surface?