Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

At what age can children put themselves to bed?

27 replies

belgo · 07/05/2007 19:58

My dd1 is three years old, and I still go through the bedtime routine to put her to bed, which takes about 40 minutes. My dh thinks that soon she should be able to put herself to bed, but I think she is still too young.

What sort of age should she be before she can go to bed on her own?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

hoxtonchick · 07/05/2007 19:59

er, a long while yet. ds is 5 & we still put him to bed, & i expect to be doing so for a good few years yet.

Hulababy · 07/05/2007 20:00

I wouldn't have thought it would be for quite a long time yet surely?

My DD is 5yo and she still is taken up to bed by me or DH. She has a story and a little chat, and then a cuddle before we say goodnight and leave the room. I can't see us not taking her to bed for a good while yet.

Hulababy · 07/05/2007 20:00

Have to sya that our bedtime bit only lasts 5-10 minutes nowadays though.

PanicPants · 07/05/2007 20:00

When they're reaching their teens I would think. Sorry if thats not what you want to hear!

brimfull · 07/05/2007 20:01

about 15 i think

Original poster

belgo · 07/05/2007 20:03

thanks! That's what I thought.

OP posts:

hayes · 07/05/2007 20:03

why does her routine take 40 mins? my dd is 5 and dh or I take her up for a story and cuddle then she is down....10 mins max.

my ds are 13 and 11 and they put themselves to bed after a kiss and a cuddle from me. I did tuck them in until last year

LittleSarah · 07/05/2007 20:05

15?! Lol.

I think at least 10, if not early teens.

Original poster

belgo · 07/05/2007 20:05

bath, story, milk, bed - 40 minutes is about right for all of that? (and I'm putting dd2 to bed at the same time) - in fact I'll be doing well if I get all that done for two kids in 40 minutes!

OP posts:

sandyballs · 07/05/2007 20:05

Its a precious time at the end of the day, which will be over all too soon. Enjoy it while they want you there.

DoorstoManual · 07/05/2007 20:05

DS is 6 and if we have guests as special treat he goes up and comes down with his teeth clean.

Then he goes up and gets his jammies on.

Then he comes down and says he is ready for a story.

He enjoys the responsibility and the novelty factor but would create merry hell if he had to do it every night. They need reassurance and routine at the end of the day.

I am shocked at your DH to be honest.

hayes · 07/05/2007 20:06

ah yes bath included that would be about right, sorry thought you meant taking her up and settling took 40 mins

Original poster

belgo · 07/05/2007 20:07

I think you're right sandyballs.

OP posts:

lou33 · 07/05/2007 20:07

3 is too young

ds2 is 6 and does it now ( as much as he can with his cp) but much before that is asking a lot of them i think

LittleSarah · 07/05/2007 20:07

Sounds about right to me belgo. I started telling dd a story off the top of my head tonight and it went on far too long, she was in bed 15 minutes later than usual.

Pollyanna · 07/05/2007 20:08

ds is 8 and we sometimes send him up on his own if he has stayed down later than the other children. He is allowed to read in bed and stops reading at an arranged time.

dd1 is 6 and I still put her to bed.
I would say you have a while to go yet!

hayes · 07/05/2007 20:08

god my lot are still outside playing, schools are off tomorrow and the rain has cleared up ....tis a lovely night. Think I will go and do bath now

JodieG1 · 07/05/2007 20:09

Much older than 3! Dd is 5.3 and still gets a story from one of us and tucked in. I wouldn't want to have them putting themselves to bed for many years yet. I love the whole story reading and tucking in part of bedtimes, can't wait until they're both old enough for all the classic stories from my childhood I loved hearing the greek myths, narnia stories, the hobbit etc from my mum at bedtimes when I was a child.

Original poster

belgo · 07/05/2007 20:10

It's an hour later here in Belgium and both girls are fast asleep in bed - bliss...
DoorstoManual - no need to be shocked by my dh, he was just being a little optimistic

OP posts:

DoorstoManual · 07/05/2007 20:11

Actually once I had hit the post button I thought that sounds very rude, so apologies to your DH.

FrayedKnot · 07/05/2007 20:12

bedtime is my favourite time with DS, also 3.

Children of this age generally need loads of reassurance that you are there & they are safe & often have certain routines etc which make them feel safe and the thought of sending DS off upstairs on his own to sort himself out is horrible.

Besides which, he wouldn't do it! He is far too unreliable.

I would probably go up hours later and find him doing a jigsaw or somehing.

Is she really capable of getting undressed, dressed in PJ's, teeth brushed (should still be supervised at his age i think) etc on her own?

Does your DH play no part in bedtime?

DH usually does DS' bath and I do stories. His bath takes about 20 mins & mine about 15, depending on how many songs I have to sing

Original poster

belgo · 07/05/2007 20:14

Dh is generally home after bedtime, but when he does put them to bed, he usually does it quite well
Frayed knot - I like the bedtime story bit as well.

OP posts:

RustyBear · 07/05/2007 20:17

After about 16 they start going to bed after you do! (at least during the holidays) DS (19) is practically nocturnal when he's home from university

Original poster

belgo · 07/05/2007 20:20

RustyBear - dd1 is a bit of a night owl - will quite happily wake up in the middle of the night and play in her bedroom - I think we've done well to get her sleeping as well as she does.

OP posts:

thedogsbollox · 07/05/2007 20:24

My two are 8 and 7 yo, and whilst in theory they can put themselves to bed already, I still think it is a precious time of the day and I have no intention of giving up their bedtime chat, story and cuddles any time soon.

Yes, I could slob on the sofa for an extra half an hour or so a day - or rush around making dinner, tidying up etc. but putting them to bed is a much much better use of mine and DH's time

Flip

1 2

Swipe left for the next trending thread