Need advice with almost 5 month olds sleep!

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My almost 5 month old has never been the best sleeper. He was very alert as a newborn, never slept in big chunks, always cat napped and rarely napped anywhere but on me. At night he slept 1.5-2.5ish hours, slowly improving to sleeping 3hours at a time. Day naps also improved in that he would sleep 30-45 minutes in his bassinet.

The day he hit 3 months he stopped sleeping at night. He would wake up after 20 minutes, and need to be rocked back to sleep. He would wake every single time he was put down, whether it was after 2 or 20 minutes of rocking, this could go on for up to 3 hours at a time, once finally down he slept 20 minutes.

The last week I couldn’t cope any more at all, and have started co sleeping. He now sleeps around an hour at a time and needs either a quick feed or a quick rock, and then he’s fine once put down in my bed. But I’m still not sleeping, and we can’t keep doing this long term.

I’ve tried putting him down drowsy and patting, ive tried patting when he wakes after being put down. None of it has worked.

Has anyone got any suggestions or ideas?

Sleep promotes sleep so crack the day naps. Google baby 45 minute sleep cycle, mine only slept this long on the day and turns out it’s a sleep cycle. I put his mobile on and now he does 2 hours at nap time

I’ve tried everything with the day naps :( I even spent several days laying with him so he had decent naps, it didn’t affect the nights at all. He just won’t sleep longer than 20-30 minutes on his own.

4 month sleep regression. You just have to tide it out.

Have you given baby a dummy?

How is feeding going? The must basic and simple reason for sleep bring excessively broken is low level hunger - as in not enough calories over 24/48h (rather than the specific hunger just before a feed).

Would the sleep regression still be going on after almost 2 months?

He’s never taken a dummy :( he feeds great! I still have a bit of an oversupply, so he often has too much and still vomits regularly. Hes gaining weight really well.

It’s hard when you have a frequent walker but my advice is embrace cosleeping and ride it out. People have such high expectations of how much babies should sleep in the first year but in reality they’re all different and you have one that’s similar to mine. She is now 12 months and last night she went down at 8, had a quick feed at 11 and then didn’t wake until it was light. They get there, just rest up where you can.

At 5 months old I would preserve with the dummy- it WILL be worth it for independant sleep -I cannot stress that enough.

Otherwise, stop rocking to sleep and shushing pat baby from awake to asleep in the cot. There will be crying with this. Lots of it initially. That why dummies ard so great for no crying, gentle independant sleep. Without the dummy it will involve crying.

If you can't handle the crying and won't get baby taking dummy, you need to accept parent-dependant methods of getting baby to sleep. Rocking, feeding to sleep, these will probably ultimately end in cosleeping.

FATEdestiny do you think it's possible to start a baby on a dummy after 5 months? My girl used to take one but I found it interfered with BF so I stopped and now that's all sorted I want her to take one and she won't!

You can but try GoodJobShesCute. It's much harder past the newborn stage but not unheard of.

I had that middle class snobbish view of dummies with my first child. "No child of mine will have a bit of plastic in their mouth". Ha!

She was 20 weeks when I first gave her a dummy. So about 5 months. To be honest due never bonded to the dummy as well as her siblings who had one from birth, so it was not a magic wand. But it did help and she did take to it.

We’ve tried several types of dummies, but every one has made him gag, no matter how persistent I was. I would have loved him to have a dummy in the car to avoid the endless crying!

I’m trying the shushing and patting to sleep in the cot.... it’s not going well so far. But even with do sleeping he’s waking every 20-60 minutes again now. Which is not ideal for him or me.

I’m worried about him being too young for sleep training. But I’m not sure what else to do. I’m at my wits end with it all.

He will always be too young for sleep training IMO.

The regression is rough, but honestly you’re kidding yourself if you think it’s bad for him as it’s totally normal what he is doing (see many posts re: the regression).

I promise you it will get better without you doing anything - just ease him back to sleep now and he’ll start sleeping longer stretches. Until then make sure you rest whenever you can. Nap when he naps if that works, early nights, a lie in when your partner is around.

It’ll pass x

Hi I was literally going to post a similar message myself today looking for advise with my 5 month old. Never was a great sleeper and then hit 4 months and got worse. Atm at night he will do max 2.5hrs before he wakes, if I’m lucky a feed and he will go back to sleep but will wake up quickly too if he feels like it. It’s almost as tho he has no ‘off’ switch. He’s so active in the day and I’m on my 2nd stinking cold this month as I haven’t for more than 2 hours since before my labour 😭 following to see what else is suggested. I do try to follow a simple sleep guide but never to the letter as it is just so boring spending all day trying to get baby to nap at set times (maybe this is why we aren’t doing well lol) he generally feeds (ebf as wont take a bottle or dummy) so I’ve read that’s a bad habit too. I force sleep by walking him in his pram and at least getting fresh air and excercise for myself when the weather is ok- feel your pain

I’m trying the shushing and patting to sleep in the cot.... it’s not going well so far. But even with do sleeping he’s waking every 20-60 minutes again now. Which is not ideal for him or me.

Why have you stopped co-sleeping?

Titty - I havnt stopped co sleeping. But he’s stopped seeping better regardless. Even with co sleeping he’s back to 20-60 minute sleeps. That’s not including all the times I managed to pat him back to sleep in between. So sometimes during a 20 minutes sleep he will stir 2-3 times and I manage to pat him back to sleep before he fully wakes.

I guess it’s iust really hard to see this coming to end, it’s been 2 months and only seems to be getting worse.

We’ve tried several types of dummies, but every one has made him gag

Poor positioning of the dummy (or size to big, but I assume you are using the 0-6m size). Use similar tactics used for getting baby to latch to the breast. Thickly cheek and have baby turn to take dummy. Or tickle to lip and have baby reach for dummy with mouth.

Position in the mouth should be same as nipple - upwards towards roof of the mouth. Gagging says you are pushing on tongue, downwards and backwards. You're looking for a latch similar to breast feeding.

Fate - he’s got lip ties and a high pallate which affected him taking a funny. We did work with a lactation consultant who tried to help him take a dummy and he just couldn’t manage it.

Firstly I’m sending sympathy, I know how hard it is when they wake frequently.

How is he during the day? Is he happy? Is there anything you think might be bothering him, such as reflux? I am a firm believer that yes babies wake frequently in the first years and it’s totally normal, but waking this much could suggest something might be stopping him relax maybe?

Also it could just be chronic overtiredness that has spiralled because he isn’t napping well during the day. Have you tried swaddling? White noise really loud? A sleepyhead? Have you tried a sling? Is there anyway you have found that he will sleep longer?

I know it doesn’t feel like it when your in the thick of it but it will end, it will pass. Your doing the best job, just being able to manage on that level of broken sleep is a rockstar achievement in itself.