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Original poster

Five months old never slept more than 30 mins.

15 replies

Rockandrollwithit · 03/02/2018 02:33

DS2 is five months old. He has never slept more than 30 minutes on his own in the night. A few weeks after bringing him home we resorted to co-sleeping as this was the only way anyone got any sleep. He would then sleep for an hour at a time. We would literally pass him between us all night.

It's no longer working. I can spend up to two hours settling him and he wakes after 30 mins. He doesn't want to co sleep or sleep in his side sleeper.

He's crying now on his eighth wake up tonight and it's only 2.20am. He isn't hungry, he has a clean nappy and his reflux is well controlled by ranitidine and omeprazole. I haven't managed to sleep at all tonight and am coping on less than two hours a night. Can't sleep in the day either (on weekdays) as I have a three year old too. DH is great at helping but he screams harder when he takes over and only wants me in the night.

I can't cope anymore and literally have no idea what to do. He doesn't like white noise and if he is rocked to sleep he becomes wide awake the second you put him down even if he is in the deepest sleep. He will sleep if I am holding him as long as he is constantly rocked and tapped - if I try to doze off he cries. He will take a dummy but will chew rather than suck so I have to hold it in and he spits it out after a while. He won't feed to sleep. Won't lie next to me on the bed. Won't sleep in a swing or a bouncy chair.

In the day time he self settles for three regular naps of about an hour each with no problems. It's just the night he hates.

What can I do? I'm so tired that I'm constantly dizzy and I feel sick all the time. Sometimes I feel so angry with him in the night, why won't he just sleep? It's not a regression as he has always been like this.

OP posts:
Jafinar · 03/02/2018 02:40

To me it sounds as though maybe his reflux is still causing discomfort despite the drugs. I'd really be tempted to go back to the doctor and explain and ask for more investigations perhaps? I know little ones are shit sleepers, but he does seem outside the 'normal' range to me.

I'm assuming you've tried keeping him awake more during the day and that hasn't worked?

PinkBlueYellow · 03/02/2018 02:44

Oh god you poor thing, that sounds awful. I had the opposite problem, he was ok (ish) at night but truly horrendous non sleeper during the day.

Will he lie next to you in bed or do you literally have to hold him? How much milk is he getting and does he throw up after a feed?

My personal experience was breastfeeding for 5 months and he never slept during the day apart from 20-30 mins here and there, screamed the rest of the time. At night he was still unsettled but was happy enough if he had a boob in his mouth for the duration Confused not much fun for me though....

I started him on formula at the point of having a breakdown and he completely changed. In his case, it was hunger. Not saying that's the issue for you but that was my experience

Original poster
Rockandrollwithit · 03/02/2018 02:47

@Jafinar

He's actually under the care of a surgeon as he was born with TOF/OA. He had a scope recently and they could see that there's no damage due to reflux at all and that his oesophagus has fully healed. He's maxed out the dose of his medications.

In the day he's such a happy baby, no reflux symptoms and no distress. He's always been a baby that likes cuddles and to be held but there's nothing unusual in that.

I have tried keeping him awake for longer in the day - just makes him grumpy and has no effect on night time sleep.

OP posts:
Original poster
Rockandrollwithit · 03/02/2018 02:48

We have a bednest and it can be tilted from the base so we've done that. In the day he will happily sleep on a flat surface so I'm not convinced that reflux is the culprit.

OP posts:
Original poster
Rockandrollwithit · 03/02/2018 02:51

@PinkYellowBlue

He's formula fed and takes 8oz every four hours ish in the day and has one feed over night. No vomiting and he's on the 75th percentile so feeding is fine. When he cries I offer him a bottle in the night but he will often refuse.

He usually ends up sleeping on me as he won't settle next to me.

OP posts:
PinkBlueYellow · 03/02/2018 02:53

Oh, bugger. Definitely not hungry then.

How long has this been going on for? Has he always been fussy at night?

Original poster
Rockandrollwithit · 03/02/2018 02:57

Since birth. He was in NICU for three weeks and wouldn't settle there either. Often we would arrive in the morning to find that the nurses had to hold and constantly settle him during the night. None of the other babies seemed to be like it. We put it down to him recovering from surgery but now I'm not so sure...

OP posts:
PastaOfMuppets · 03/02/2018 03:03

I know this sounds stupid, but could you take him to a chiro or osteo?

Jafinar · 03/02/2018 07:07

I’m assuming you can’t get away with swaddling in the cot next to your bed as an alternative to co-sleeping?

Hm, does sound a lot like it’s not reflux or hunger. I think I’d still be looking for some kind of medical cause.

FWIW, mine was in NICU for 3 months plus Hospital for another 1 and was also a crap sleeper for over a year though not quite on the scale of yours. I often wonder if mine had residual pain that the Calpol wouldn’t touch. I also wonder about the affect of being in NICU on the brain / developing routine. But then yours was there for a fairly short time so perhaps not relevant?

Sorry I can’t offer anything more useful!
Flowers Wine

Original poster
Rockandrollwithit · 03/02/2018 07:57

Pasta, I'm thinking of trying an osteo, not my normal type of thing at all but getting desperate!

Jafinar, I do wonder about NICU. I had a section and my stomach still doesn't feel quite normal after five months. Given that DS' surgery was on his oesophagus and trachea, I wonder if they do still cause him discomfort on a really low level.

OP posts:
FurryGiraffe · 03/02/2018 08:23

You poor thing- it sounds hellish. DS2 had a (long) phase of very frequent waking and refusal to sleep at night unless rocked/walked around (sometimes I could BF him to sleep but it was hit and miss). DH and I used to do shifts. It was awful.

In DS2's case it started at six months with a combination of food intolerance causing endless painful trapped wind and wheezing and coughing from asthma. I think he was just too uncomfortable to sleep properly without some major sleep assistance. Settled fine for naps in the day though Hmm.

FirstTimeMummaB · 04/02/2018 13:27

Just wanted to add to pp from FurryGiraffe.
My DS is ebf (although we did mix feeding the earlier days) we were in the exact same boat. Constant passing of him between me and DH and we were lucky if we got more than 2 hours of sleep a night. DS would just scream and scream no matter what we tried. The only time he’d calm down is if we were bouncing or rocking him.
For us it turned out to be cows milk protein allergy. As I’m ebf I cut dairy out of my diet and within days I had a new baby! He was happier, slept longer.. despite medical professionals telling us ‘it couldn’t possibly be that’ I’m so pleased we tried it as we’re now finally enjoying our baby.
Maybe try your little one on a different formula? I don’t really know much about formula feeding but maybe it’s not agreeing with him and hence him being so unsettled?

FirstTimeMummaB · 04/02/2018 13:30

Also meant to add, I was told by a private paediatrician that reflux isn’t a problem in its own right, it’s CAUSED by something. GP’s are always so quick to send us away with remedies for the reflux without actually querying the underlying cause. For us it was the cmpa obviously so once I was dairy free his reflux improved massively x

MarthasHarbour · 04/02/2018 13:31

I was also about to recommend you speak to your GP about the formula milk, you might need the prescription 'dairy free' type.

You absolutely have my sympathy, sleep deprivation is horrendous Flowers

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