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Original poster

Cluster feeds-please help!!

18 replies

Ljpoz · 26/01/2018 01:17

Hi all,

Just sat with my 10 day old baby girl who has now been feeding constantly since 7.30pm.

I have read about cluster feeding hut I thought the idea was they settled at bedtime after cluster feeding? This is just insane and I am sat here as I type trying and failing to keep my eyes open.

Any advice? Guidance? I feel so out of my depth

OP posts:

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AdorableMisfit · 26/01/2018 01:33

I have no advice, only sympathy. I'm here with my 15 day old boy who's been on and off my boobs since 10pm. He keeps falling asleep on my boob, but if I try to put him in the crib he wakes up crying and only stops when he gets the boob back. In the day, he sleeps for 2 or 3 hour stretches at a time. I don't get why he won't do that at night?!

actino · 26/01/2018 04:19

That's normal, but understandably very difficult. A 10 day old won't have a bedtime yet, and anyway there's nothing magical about a bedtime that would stop a cluster feed. She'll stop when she's ready to stop.

The best advice I can give is to grab a book and some chocolate because there's nothing else to do but feed the baby until she's done. I'm not joking about the chocolate, the little sugar boosts help me keep my eyes open when feeding overnight.

teaandbiscuitsforme · 26/01/2018 05:15

Have you tried feeding lying down in your bed? (Making sure you follow the safe cosleeping guidelines) It means that you get to rest whilst they feed and if they doze off, you don't wake them when you try to move them.

For me this was the only way to get through night feeds with two EBF kids.

EssentialHummus · 26/01/2018 05:31

Congratulations op! I’d also suggest cosleeping or just plenty of snacks, drinks and Netflix.

teaandbiscuitsforme · 26/01/2018 05:44

Adorable Newborns don't have day and night yet. They need to feed more overnight to boost/regulate your supply.

People will suggest lots of 'tricks' to get them into a crib (warm the mattress, put down clothing that smells of you etc) but it never worked for my DD and I didn't even bother trying with DS.

It's the transfer that's the problem so they wake up as soon as they realise they're not with you. It's instinct, they can't help it. Helps to protect them from attacks from sabre tooth tigers etc! For me, the only answer was not to put them down- so they stay asleep where they fall asleep. So in the day that was sling, arms, bed, pram, car seat; at night that was in our bed. Otherwise, when they're a little older, it's making sure they fall asleep where they're going to sleep - so putting them awake in a cot rather than feeding to sleep and then trying to transfer. This probably needs a dummy.

mehhh · 26/01/2018 06:01

My dd did this the same quite badly I remember just sitting crying at 3am after no sleep and unable to put her down

Eventually I gave her a bottle At bedtime to settle her, she then had one bottle a day for the first 4/5 months, we've now moved to bottle completely

I hadn't read or heard much about cluster feeding but reading about about laying down in bed and feeding on your side - it's amazing when dd was waking lots though the night we used to do this, wish I would have known about cluster feeding and fed that way

Bobbiepin · 26/01/2018 06:04

I'd second the dummy idea but its a long shot. DD cluster fed from 8pm to 2am for a good couple of weeks. I used to sit on the sofa (hadn't graduated to the bed yet) with silent tears rolling down my face because I was so sore and tired. It's a phase, it will pass. For now the best thing you can do is sack off the housework and all that and try your best to get some sleep during the day where ever possible. If you have someone else that can help out with that then great, if not do the bare minimum. You need proper rest.

RemainOptimistic · 26/01/2018 06:11

Drink loads of water and eat oaty foods e.g. porridge and flapjacks, to help your supply (and energy levels).

This stage will pass!

Original poster

Ljpoz · 26/01/2018 07:22

Thank you everyone! She eventually stopped at half 2 and slept until 7 which I although was great for me seems a long time without a feed; the worrying never stops!

Bit too scared to feed lying down as I know o will fall asleep and worry about rolling onto her!?

Hopefully this won't be for long.

OP posts:

IhateMondaymornings · 26/01/2018 07:25

I'd definitely try a dummy. Mine used me as a dummy but I thought he was cluster feeding for hours. Once he had a dummy he had regular feeds from me and slept. It didn't interfere with his latch either although some say dummies do.

teaandbiscuitsforme · 26/01/2018 07:39

You won't roll onto her! Look up cosleeping positions to see - you have her feeding, your legs curled round her in a C shape and your arm above her head. You really can't go anywhere.

I know it sounds daunting, it took me ages to do it with DD even though a Midwife had shown me how when she was first born. But honestly, the sleep is so worth it! I was much less tired with 2 under 2, cosleeping with DS than I was with just DD and trying to stay awake to feed.

It will get easier!

Bobbiepin · 26/01/2018 08:17

Cluster feeding generally results in a longer sleep, baby is stocking up so to speak so they can go down for longer. You might be hitting a growth spurt soon, that was always the worst cluster time for us. After all that feeding you definitely need the sleep too!

Newmummy87123 · 26/01/2018 09:10

As all previous post have said this is normal. It is very hard at first it does get easier. I heard the cluster feeds are also nature's way of boosting your milk supply. For this reason and in my case because at 10 days DD still didn't latch well I waited till she was a month old before I gave her a dummy.
I also did the lay down feeding my DH stayed up a lot with me as I was worried aswell at the time about falling asleep. We did end up cosleeping (I would never admit this to my mum).
Also agree with lots of chocolate and Netflix. Watched the whole of Game of Thrones during first few weeks after having DD

AdorableMisfit · 26/01/2018 11:56

Well, my DS finally went down in his crib at 5:30 a.m. after sleeping on my chest for a while. He woke up at 8 for more milk, so I got precisely 2.5 hours sleep. I could cope with the constant feeding if I actually got a decent sleep at the end of it! How long is this likely to go on for? This is such a shock to my system... My first baby (now 7 years old) cluster fed in the evenings but then slept for 4 hours before waking for another feed. I just sort of assumed that this one would behave similarly, but he doesn't!

Newmummy87123 · 26/01/2018 12:31

I think with my DD she was about 9/10 weeks when I got a 4 hour stretch

AdorableMisfit · 26/01/2018 13:34

Argh, I hope this doesn't carry on for 10 weeks!

Isitwinteryet · 26/01/2018 17:26

It feels like forever but it won't last long! I also didn't feed lying down as terrified of falling asleep and putting her in danger.
Don't worry about her sleeping longer. If she's hungry she'll let you know. :)

BerryBee · 26/01/2018 19:21

Congratulations and well done op!

I feel your pain...my DD once cluster fed I think for more or less 12 hours. I was in tears on the phone to the nct helpline! And wondering why this had never been mentioned in my nct ante natal group!

It's a phase though and it doesn't last long....it's hard to feel that at the time!

Get comfy, binge on Netflix, have loads of water to drink and eat lots. Before you know it, this will have passed.

Well done and good luck. Xxx

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