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Daughter almost two years old, still hasn't slept through the night

8 replies

djk5474 · 02/01/2018 15:31

Hello there from a relatively ancient (48) first-time dad to a wonderful almost-two-year old daughter. My partner has breast-fed our daughter since birth, and continues to do so, albeit far less frequently now. Our daughter who until recently has co-slept with us would wake my partner up repeatedly through the night to breast-feed. (I'd wake up by default because of the noise). While our daughter now naps a good one and a half or one and three-quarters of an hour per day, she continues to wake up repeatedly - sometimes for seconds, sometimes for minutes - throughout the night. We literally have not had a full night's sleep since she was born.

In an effort to wean her off breast-feeding during the night and improve all our chances of getting a full night's sleep, about ten days ago we moved our daughter to her own room. The deal now is that I put her to bed just after mum breast-feeds her, and go into her room when she cries in the night. I can easily put her to bed, and find comforting her back to sleep to be easy...but she is crying out for mama in the middle of the night as much as she used to cry when co-sleeping and breast-feeding, so I'm still waking up at least once every two hours to do my soothing routine. Do I simply need to be patient and believe that this will all change for the better soon, or is there something in the routine that we can change so we all sleep better? Neither I nor my partner can bear to let our daughter "cry it out," for what it's worth.

Apologies for the long comment, I'm new to all this and haven't yet picked up on the protocol.

OP posts:
OhCarrieMathison · 02/01/2018 16:26

I think it sounds as though you have a good plan in place and I would persevere.
Your DD will soon understand and accept that she doesn't get breastfed through the night.
I would make sure she has plenty to eat throughout the day and hopefully the nighttime wakings will
Stop soon. It may take some weeks / months.

witheringnights · 02/01/2018 16:44

This was us too!
It does get better!
Our son is 2.5 now- he will still wake at night, but breastfeeding stopped a while back. (Diff babies are different- it could be because he was at nursery so had started eating more solids, and finally taken a bottle, or that I was pregnant- not sure if you want to keep bf in the day- we stopped night first, day later)
We also put him in his own room but ended up putting a mattress on the floor too, and we started night in his cot, kept him in there if he’d soothe easily, but co-slept if he was a bit louder.
Very gradual process, but we took it in turns- three nights each, so the other could try to catch up properly with sleep.
Eventually he slept for longer.

It’s really hard. Sleep deprivation is such a sucker. And in the middle of the night it just feels awful.

You’ll get there

Rubyslippers7780 · 02/01/2018 16:48

Our ds2 did exactly this..then all of a sudden stopped at 13 months and slept through. No sleep training or anything he was just ready. It is brutal and knackering but take comfort that it will stop.

Rubyslippers7780 · 02/01/2018 16:48

Sorry he slep through at 25 month...

djk5474 · 02/01/2018 19:22

Many thanks for all your kind messages! It's nice to know that we're not doing anything that is hindering the process. I will try to remain patient and see what happens...fingers crossed for a night's sleep soon...

OP posts:
Bosabosa · 02/01/2018 19:25

No advice OP but we are in same boat with a 23 month old too.
The previous post gives me hope!

applepatch · 03/01/2018 10:44

Hello, just jumping in to say me too with DD 19 months and sympathies to you all. I can't remember the last time I slept for more than 2-3 hours in a row.
We're not up for sleep training/leaving her to cry either so gritting our teeth and powering through but man oh man it's hard.
Came on mumsnet today to look at the sleep section after a particularly rough night (my day started at 3:15am and I spent the wee small hours in a rocking chair trying not to cry and feel sorry for myself!)
Sometimes it's just so hard but comforting to know it's not just my daughter even though it seems like it at times.

witheringnights · 08/01/2018 10:55

Hey @djk
Just popping on to say ‘how are things?’
I know it’s only been a week, but hoping you’re still able to settle your daughter ok, and hopefully it’s getting quicker? Easier?

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