5 month old BF ALL NIGHT! Help!

[Sleepymcsleepyson]

DS is 23 weeks tomorrow. He's never been a very good sleeper but what makes it worse is that he wants to feed most of the night.
He naps about 2.30-2.50hrs per day. Usually 4 or 5 30-45min naps. On average he's awake 1.5 hours. Sometimes slightly longer sometimes slightly less.

He goes to bed around 6pm. Usually sleeping by 6.30-7pm and needs a fair bit of help to get to sleep- as he does with naps.

He has a dream feed of 9oz of formula (he can take between 4- just under 9oz) around 10.30-11. He will often need resetting a few times between going to bed and dream feed.

On a good night he'll go through to 2.30am. I bring him to bed to feed and we co sleep until 6.30-7am. From 2.30 he's up every 30-60minutes to feed. If I put him back in his cot he usually wakes soon after and will stay awake which is why we co sleep.

It's getting to the point where I'm barely sleeping and it's taking its toll. I feel myself beginning to get irritated when he's feeding for the 4th time after 2am! I feed laying down so technically I'm resting but i don't want to rest anymore i want to Sleep!

I've tried feeding him loads through the day. He could easily go 3 hours now but i try to feed about 2 to 2.5 hours to make sure he's got plenty of calories in him. I've read conflicting articles about doing this and not doing this to get better sleep.

I can't sleep in the day either because it's such short stretches.

He was weighed 2 weeks before Xmas and was 15lb4oz. He's between the 9th & 25th centile.

I've tried a dummy through the night and he loses his mind. I'm really consistent with it but he screams and screams for such a long time until i breastfeed him. I'm pretty sure he's only hungry for one of the feeds and the rest is comfort sucking.

Not sure if what other info to give but if anyone has any wonderful tips please throw them my way. I'm not prepared to leave him to cry either.

It’s hard but if I was in your position, I would stop milk being ‘on tap’. I breastfeed but I try to settle him other ways before just feeding him. If he’s not hungry, as you say it’s sometimes just comfort sucking. Give him some time to self settle if he’s not too upset.

My DS is now 8 months and self settles for naps and bedtime with a little help from me stroking his face with a soft comforter. But he didn’t do this till 6/7 months old.

Thanks for replying. I think I need to maybe feed him in his room. (He went into his own room 2 weeks ago because we were all disturbing each other) However because I'm so tired I've got into the habit of bringing him to bed. I've s a feeling its going to be a tough habit to crack. We go abroad for a week on the 16th. Do you think im better going with the flow until we get back incase that upsets his routine too?

Is there someone else there who can give him formula so you can sleep?

I’m planning on moving mine to his own room soon too. It’s too easy to just pick them up and quickly get them back to sleep. I’m hoping that by moving him into his own room, I won’t hear him, then won’t respond to his wakings so much so he learns to sleep through (fingers crossed).

I would try and get into to habit now but start properly after your holiday. Just expect that there may be a few days, maybe weeks where it’ll be hard for you but in the long run you’ll all sleep better.

If he’s been fed but wakes after you put him down, I’d also just leave him (as long as he’s not too upset) to go to sleep himself. My 8 month old sometimes does this I plan to just leave him (may take an hour to get himself back to sleep) but in the long run, he’ll learn to pit himself back to sleep quicker.

I’m really sorry but this is really normal for breastfed babies. For some reason down the line we have decided there must be something wrong but the truth is it’s perfectly normal. It could be a growth spurt but more likely the 4 month sleep regression (which arrived for us at 5 months too, it was hellish but it passed). Get as much rest and help as you can

Firsttimemum777 how did you get your baby to buy in to a comforter? I've just started putting DS down for naps having rocked him to sleep with one. Hopefully he'll start getting attached to it! Unfortunately when he screams he screams to the point I fear my windows will shatter. I do understand that sleep is developmental but I just wish I could help him more with it. And have a good kip myself. The last few nights he's been up at 12.30am so they've been a bit tougher going.

wowbutter- my DH could but he's been really unwell this week and was in a and e on Thursday and other than this week he's usually working, plus he's not great with limited sleep ! He does usually do the last feed though when he's well!

crazycatlady5- deep down I know it's perfectly normal. I just happen to know a few mum's who's bf babies are sleeping 11-7 recently and thought maybe mine had missed the memo! My mum keeps telling me that when he's on solids he'll sleep better but the more I read about that the less hopeful i feel

Thanks everyone.

I think it totally depends on the baby. My husband didn’t sleep through the night till he was two! And he was formula fed. I was BF and slept through at 8 months, my 11 month old Bf baby doesn’t yet sleep through.

He has always kind of rubbed a soft blanket/muslin I’ve his face when he’s tired but never sent him to sleep himself. I bought a really soft comforter and had it with me when I breastfed him - gave up on that but all of sudden (around 6 1/2 months) I used the comforter which smells of me and rubbed it over his ace continuously and it made him very sleepy and he went to sleep himself. I use it every time now so I think he associates it with sleep. However, my DH used a different blanket the other day (same fabric though) and he fell asleep to that too so it’s more of the rubbing motion than the actual comforter.

I’m sure it’s just a phase and will pass. They never stick to the same thing for long.

Hi Firsttimemum777, I think I might be winning with the comforter! I was able to settle DS twice last night by stroking his face with it and didn't bring him into bed until 5am!

I’m hoping that by moving him into his own room, I won’t hear him, then won’t respond to his wakings so much so he learns to sleep through

Wow.

What’s ‘wow’ about that? I’m not going to let him get upset.

He plays happily in his cot for sometimes for up to an hour during the night. When he’s right next to us, we don’t sleep. And I’ve already fed him by the way.

So judgemental.

I just went by what you actually said. 🙄

I guess that’s the problem that you only go by what’s said without knowing the full picture. Then making comments like that makes people feel like a shit mum - that they are doing something wrong. No need.

As if she meant that she's just going to neglect her baby by putting him in his own room!

She said she’s hoping to be able to IGNORE him.

If I ignore a partner I am neglecting them. But little babies can apparently be ignored whenever it’s too inconvenient. Whatever.

At the moment I am quickly picking him up to give him a feed so he doesn’t wake my OH up. If he’s in his own room, I can wait to see if he self settles. If he gets upset, I’ll go to him. Call that ignoring if you want.