Can't have a night out

[Lovelyivy]

My baby sleeps on the breast with me in bed. He is now 8 months and it got so bad I can't have a night out with my partner(and we really need it!!!). He can't even sleep with me in bed because we don't get a comfy sleep with baby in the middle. What to do? Desperate to get him sleep alone. When I try cry it out he screams and shakes all over - so I can't do that. Desperately need a intimate time with my partner! Please help

When your baby falls asleep can you transfer him to his cot? DS is 10 months old and falls asleep in between me and dh in our bed but then a transfer him into his cot in his room and he sleep really well and sleeps through most nights.

*i+

If he does wake crying I bring him back in our bed than put him back when he falls asleep (most nights he's pretty good though.)

He wakes up if I move him

Oh that's a difficult one. I thought one he's in a deep sleep you could quietly move him. It's sounds like he's using you as his sleep association. Have you tried having something near him during breastfeeding like a blanket or small cuddly toy that could slowly become a comfort item to him? This worked with ds when I tried it but mind you he was a lot younger.

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www.google.co.uk/amp/s/www.whattoexpect.com/first-year/breaking-bad-sleep-habits.aspx/amp

Hopefully you'll find this link useful

I don’t believe there are bad sleep habits but I do understand it’s tough re: nights out. I think some babies are just much needier than others and breastfed babies especially. Can you put a cot with one side off next to your bed and shimmy him across when he’s asleep? Then you have more space. The other thing you can try if you’re ready for it is put him on a floor bed in another room so you feed him to sleep lying down then leave him. Then join him for the first night waking or feed back to sleep then go back to bed. Look up Montessori floor beds, you’ll need to babyproof the room. In terms of nights out I also haven’t had one in 11 months as my daughter is the same as your son, but really it’s such a short space of time. When she’s over a year I’m going to leave her here and there in the evening and even if she doesn’t go to sleep she can be distracted till I am home.

They’re still so little there’ll be so much time for nights out x

My baby sleeps on the breast with me in bed

The first step is unlatching baby when he is asleep. Then see if sometimes you can cosleep cuddle him to sleep instead if latching.

With my first DS we made a floorbed in his room but using a small double (4ft) mattress. Then I could breastfeed, cuddle and roll out of the bed without disturbing him. I had to be the one to move - moving him would never work.

Then I could get back into my bed with DP. Also meant if DS then woke later and I was too tired to get in and out of bed I could just go to sleep next to him.

Could you try that?