14 week old DD - daytime sleep

[EssentialHummus]

I'd appreciate any advice.

For the last six weeks or so, DD won't go down for naps without a fight, after previously just dozing off. I learnt the hard way that after an hour / 1.20 max I needed to put her down in her cot otherwise she just screams and screams.

She shows absolutely no signs of tiredness - no yawning, rubbing eyes/ears etc.

Sometimes, with the room dark, a dummy in and me shushing, she'll sleep for an hour or so. But sometimes she'll lie there awake, looking increasingly tired, for an hour or more. And eventually get fractious, or sleep for 30 min or so and wake up still groggy. Sometimes shushing/white noise helps, sometimes not.

She will sleep in the sling or (more effort) the pram if I go out and stay out, but I don't know if/when to keep trying the cot, or whether to go with whatever works for now - am I setting myself up for trouble when she's older? Is this just a phase?

I am walking non stop with her in the sling at the moment - like, 10 km a day - and I feel like my entire life revolves around her naps.

It gets worse as the day goes on (presumably because she's cumulatively tired?).

What to do? And when does it end?

Is she hungry? Are you bf or ff?

BFing with one bottle of formula before bed. Sleeps through or if she wakes up will refuse the bottle/suck but not swallow. She rarely demonstrates hunger during the day anymore; I'll feed her every 2-3 hours.

You're right to put her down before outward tired signs show. I'd say an hour would be average awake time at this stage. 1h20 is on the late side, not intolerable when needed but I wouldn't want most/every awake time being this long. As many 1h20m as you have the other way - 40m awake times.

As for help needed, really not unusual to need to give baby extra help to nap through this stage. Movement is the easiest way to give extra help (after a dummy) but if you plan to have baby independantly sleeping then hands-off movement is better. I'd highly recommend a bouncy chair for naps, using your foot to bounce it. The sling or rocking in your arms are much more dependant ways to do other with movement, rather than independant.

Just get baby used to sleeping well independantly, don't worry that you need to help baby achieve that now. Once baby is in the habit of sleeping easily and well, it becomes much easier to reduce your input needed.

Thanks fate. We have a bouncy chair, though I'd not tried it for this. Is there a time age-wise/developmentally when she is likely to need less help napping?

My DS is 14 weeks and exactly the same. I have no advice but this really is just a phase, it will get better soon.

Is there a time age-wise/developmentally when she is likely to need less help napping?

It can be a slow, gradual change from now. Maybe she needs constant movement to stay asleep now. But the more well-tested she is the easier she'll find sleeping. Do maybe in a month or so you will knlh need movement for the first and last 5/10 mins of the nap. Maybe a few weeks later you start reducing the tempo of the bouncing as well as how long you bounce for.

In time, with small, gradual changes you may get to just needing up put baby in bouncer with a dummy and bounce twice then just wait. That would be telling you baby is ready for cot naps like bedtime.

Movement also serves a purpose at the other end of a nap. This stage you're going through us when naps become shorter and need to be very frequent. Outside of the newborn phase (first 13 ish weeks, the "fourth trimester") baby's sleep develops into cycles and naps are usually 1 sleep cycle.

Baby needs to learn to link one sleep cycles know the next. Sleeping in something that moves means you can help baby to go back to sleep in a second cycle. In time baby will learn to link sleep cycles without help, but many benefit from help to extend their naps so they can stay asleep for longer.

As to how long it takes, mine have been about 5 months shanade naps extended and movement was no longer needed. But for other babies it could be anywhere in the range of 3-9 months.

fate and rock - thank you.

I forgot to ask - if I put her down and she doesn't drift off, is it better to keep trying to get her to sleep there, or to put in the sling/pram and get her to sleep. IE, is it more important to develop an association between the cot and naps, or to get her to sleep the amount she should be sleeping?