Softening mattress

[m33r]

My LB is 4 months old and thus far the only way I get any sleep (more than 20 mins) is to bed share so he has been sleeping on top of my bed, on top of summer duvet woth me in a dressing gown. I really don’t want to bed share and have tried everything to get him into his ‘next to me’ including my towel which I use in the morning for my hair, off the radiator to give heat and my smell being over his mattress.

Tonight, I put a toddler duvet under his sheet on top of the mattress and he has been sound asleep for half an hour - miracle! (usually at this time, he lies on top of my bed while I watch tv upstairs). Basically i’ve Tried to re create the softness of my bed.

Is this a really terrible idea? I really want to be able to go downstairs after 6pm again at some point and more importantly want to stop bed sharing but i’n Not sure i’n Not just swapping one SIDS risk for another.

Hope that makes sense and welcome any honest views! Thanks!

It's definitely a SIDS risk. The safest place for baby is on a firm mattress. As to whether you follow sids recommendations or not, that's your decision based on your own view of the risk. No point pretending the is no risk though, you need to make your decision based on informed knowledge of the risk involved.

My also be worth noting that smother SIDS recommendation is that baby sleeps in the room you are at all times in the first 6 months. That jeans early evening and daytime naps. So the guidance would mean either baby sleeps downstairs until you go to bed, or you stay in the bedroom with baby at all time when he sleeps.

Thanks fate. I guess I know this really. I suppose I just need to persevere with moving him into the crib but he just doesn’t seem to sleep in it. I tried and tried with a dummy to no avail. We have the sleepyhead which we used for my first but i don’t want to use it either. Up every 20minutes I suppose it is then

Well, it's all about balancing risks.

Sharing a mattress is not the ideal place for baby to sleep, since advice is a separate mattress. To cosleep safely would be on a firm matress that is free from pillows and loose bedding, so the duvet on your bed is a risk.

You could therefore decide that sleeping on a separate mattress which is soft and has loose bedding underneath is safer than cosleeping in a similar manner. Neither are ideal, it's about balancing risks not necessarily eliminating it.