Getting creative with 7 week old who only sleeps in my arms

[Frokni]

Hi

I am so tired I will cut to the chase. New born won't sleep anywhere by my arms. Has anyone here got creative and done something in babies cot/Moses to emulate baby being really cuddled without it being dangerous of course

Co-sleeping isn't an option as in our bed we have our almost 3 year old too and I think it's too risky. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

I am exhausted and need my rest. She sleeps for ages in my arms, which in turn means, I don't sleep!!

*but in my arms
Not
*by my arms

Put a warm t shirt that smells of you over her matress, like the matress goes inside the shirt.
Put her down in stages, hold her arms to her body and stroke her head and face, then slowly stop and move away.
Heartbeat white noise app/Ewan sleep sheep
Swaddle and cuddle then put down

These are things that have worked at one time with my DD. Good luck!

Oh I sympathise. Had this with my DD. We gradually got her to do some of the night in her pram cot (more narrow than the Moses basket which I think made her feel cosier). Heated her blanket before putting her in. Bought a lavender stuffed teddy bear that could also be heated. Swaddle cloth. White noise. Ended up buying a sleepy head at great expense but it did help.

Can you share the nights with a partner? Me and DH took it in turns during the first few weeks to hold her downstairs while the other got some kip in. But not much of an option post paternity leave. Even just at the weekends?

DD is now 2 and fast asleep in her own too so it will pass! Horrible to go through though. I'd say enjoy the cuddles but I wanted to punch people who said that to me

As long as you are between the baby and 3yo bedsharing is absolutely fine.
Alternatively, if you have a spare room, you could bedsharing with the baby elsewhere while your partner bedshaees with the 3 yo. I recommend bed bumpers to stop the 3yo falling out without you there,

I think everyone has stopped recommending these but I'm to anyway, we used a poddlepod and Sleepyhead to emulate the feeling of being held. We used a Snuza Go nappy monitor while using it for peace of mind and sidecar-ed the cot to our bed. Used safely with both dd1 and dd2 for us it was a sanity saver!

I second the sleepyhead. I would warm it first too, and you can still cuddle baby while they’re in it. I cosleep with my 10 month old anyway but the sleepyhead mostly worked and would have kept working had I persevered.

Swaddle, sleepyhead, dummy and white noise worked for us. Took a while but we got there.

bobbiepin I will definitely try to put her down in stages and I love the t shirt idea!

I love the look of a sleepyhead but not the cost. If other options don't work then we will splash out.

My DH is up at 4.30am but home by 4.30pm and happily takes over then but can't take a night shift until he's off the next day. I am buying swaddle blankets as I type and a mobile for her cot!

Thanks so much mumsnetters x

We had this it was exhausting!! I rolled towels up and put them around the edges of the basket to make the space smaller and more snuggly. We also covered the mattress in either mine or the husbands tshirts and warmed the mattress with a hot water bottle before putting her down. Also white noise on my phone. It seemed to work!

ghostlyfeet it's reassuring to know I'm not alone. My DD1 created her own routine from day 1 we hardly needed to do anything with her schedule. But DD2 is quite the cheeky minx lol x

Poddlepod is a lot cheaper than Sleepyhead and has the same effect.

Sounds strange but when I transfer baby to cot I pin his arms to his sides with quite a strong grip. Without this he wakes up instantly upon putting down.

My baby would never ever sleep (well that's what it felt like) I have sampled most swaddle blankets and found the grosnug to be really good when he was a new born. He's now 4 months and we still have to swaddle- Just for naps though- and we use a swaddleme.

Thank you for all the replied. Didn't realise that cluster feeding could last that long. Been trying to put ds down to sleep for the past 2 hours but he is having none of it. He falls asleep feeding and would happily sleep on me or his dad but once we put him down he wakes up crying and sucks his knuckles. I then offer him a feed and he goes mental as if he's not eaten all day!!!what is that about???
Hope you guys have more success getting some sleep

I used to put the Moses basket next to me on the bed and sleep with my hand in the basket

Look on eBay for sleepy heads. Or message me ;-)

Finally got ds to sleep at 00.30am and he slept just over 3 hours so that I'm very happy with. Now doing feed #1 and hoping he'll be happy to go back to sleep soon. Anyone else up?
I'm forever thirsty since starting breastfeeding reminds me of the early days of being pregnant when I felt I could run the tap dry...

Thanks so much guys. Am scouring eBay now for some sleepyheads then am getting some swaddle blankets too. DH took over last night which was great but I have sadly been unwell last 24 hours and am having my first period after baby and it's horrendous!! Knowing I am not alone in any of this is such a relief. Seeing HV 2moz so hope to be more positive than before when I was just a tired crying mess Lol!!

Have you swaddle and dummy?

Much easier, cheaper and longer term than the sleepyhead.

You want a rectangle of material about 1.5m on long edge, anything from 50cm on short edge. A cot sheet will do. Or cut up and old duvet, an old thin towel.

Banyan on centre of long side. Left side over left arm/shoulder, under baby and up other dude. Repeat right side. Tight around shoulder, loose at hips.

Add dummy.

Both my DSs would not sleep on their own at that age. With DS1 we tried literally everything - warming the basket, swaddling, dummy, something that smells of me but nothing worked. I was so stressed and no one got any sleep.

DS2 is 11 weeks old. With him we just went with it and he has started sleeping on his own more in the last few weeks - he will do half the night in his sleepyhead and then come in with us.

Definitely try different solutions but sometimes at that age they are little and just need to be held.

Honestly I would just stop doing the sleeping in arms thing, straight away. Anything you do in the day will be expected at night and that’s to ideal (as you know!). Don’t worry too much about a bit of crying,just find some other way of getting them to sleep in the day eg wrapped i. A cosy blanket in a bouncy chair (snug!j