Hi,
Very long story short:
At 4 months old our son's sleep was developing normally, then deteriorated to 90-minute episodes, very rarely longer. He's now 3 and nothing has changed. Over this time we've tried every settling technique we can think of, tinkered with his schedule and attempted weaning (day and night), all with zero effect (meaning that he will scream for hours).
He has his own room and toddler bed (he climbed out of his cot at 14 months and whacked his head on the floor), which he starts off in till he wakes at 90 mins or so, but we end up cosleeping so we can all get the maximum sleep available to us.
He is still as attached to my wife's breasts as he was as a newborn, and when he's not breastfeeding he's often talking about them or asking to stroke them. My wife is firm with him about this in the day, but it is still happening at night, after he clawed back our latest attempt at nightweaning after 3 weeks due to our exhaustion (we're both working). He has an enormous ability to resist change, and can go for weeks or months without us seeing any progress after sustained efforts to change things.
He is still a very reluctant eater, and hates sitting still at the table for meals, despite 2 and a half years of us calmly and firmly trying to instill this.
He has loads of energy and finds it hard to wind down, even after a lot of exercise.
I suppose I just would like to hear from anyone who's experienced anything like this (I know it's not a very common situation) and not really where we've gone wrong (we've spent enough time on that over the years). A big factor is that we live in a flat so we can't really tolerate long periods of screaming, so any advice on how to improve this situation (even a small step forward would be amazing) would be very much appreciated.
Thank you!