1 Year Old Still Waking for Bottle

[PrancingMoose]

My 1yo DS still wakes in the night for a bottle. He wakes at different times, Last night it was midnight and 4:15 and the night before it was just 4:15am. He generally goes back to sleep afterwards, but sometimes not. He seems genuinely hungry and devours a 5oz bottle. I am trying to get as much food into him during the day, and he seems to eat all he wants to eat. I mix spoon feeding with finger food, and he generally seems to enjoy food but I worry whether I should be giving him more.

My HV told me I should sleep train him with CC and remove both the bottle and his dummy otherwise she said he'll keep waking like this until he's about 3. I am not keen on doing this as I am not sure I agree with CC. Other opinion on sites seems to concur that it is just for comfort and I should reduce milk/replace with water/let him cry etc.

I guess I am asking does anyone else have this issue and what did you do? There is a lot of theory out there, but I would like to hear from people who have been through it. All my friends seem to have babies who can be fairly easily soothed back to sleep if they wake, but my DS will not settle unless he has milk. I realise I have probably caused this situation. I always cave and take the quickest easy option as I feel bad for my DH who needs to get up for a long commute in the morning. (He shares the load at weekends, but I am going back to work next week so we'll both be suffering!)

Any survivors out there with war stories to share?

Hi OP
I agree with the water replacement. I did this with my DC so whenever they woke it wasn't a bottle it was water and cuddles.
I don't agree with anything your HV said! Don't take the dummy away yet as you'll end up driving yourself mad trying to settle DC yourself after taking away something they find comforting. Mine had dummies until they were 3 and they're both fine (as long as it's gone before they turn 4 their teeth will be fine)
I did do CC with mine too but not throughout the night, only at bedtime and it worked a treat for me to the point where they actually stopped waking in the night altogether. I wouldn't do it throughout the night though

I wouldn't drop the dummy. I would stop night feeds though.

Either cold turkey and just accept you'll be stood next to his cot shushing and calming him for a long time each night until he accepts it (probably a week at most), but I wouldn't leave him to cry alone. Or swap for water. Probably the same outcome (standing by the cot trying to call a crying baby for ages) just with the added water. Id just go cold turkey completely and reassure through the anger.

I'd also suggest you stop spoon feeding by now. Baby should be able to manage foods without being mushed by now. Things like sandwiches and fruit/veg slices being easiest.

Personally I think 'he'll still be waking until he's 3' is nonsense, there's absolutely no way of knowing that!! By all means as above cut the feeds out if you wish but don't be frightened by 'bad habit' advice x

If as his mama you feel he is hungry for it and you're doing the right thing, then carry on - don't let HV tell you it's wrong x

I'd definitely go cold turkey on the bottle overnight. No way would I remove the dummy though, that doesn't make any sense to me at all!

Mine still wakes for a feed at 1. I think she just needs it. She is asleep a long time otherwise. It's not forever (i keep telling myself).

My 2 and a half year old still wakes up for cows milk in the night. Think it's just a comfort thing

We nightweaned DD at 11 months. Similar to you she had two (breast)feeds at 12 and 4ish. We decided to stop feeding but did whatever else needed to comfort. For us this was cuddling her and lying next to her on a mattress on her floor. First night she cried (whilst being cuddled) for about 45mins and stayed awake 2 hours in total, nights 2 and 3 she was awake for 2 hours but calm, night 4 she slept through. Since then she has slept through most nights, with cuddling on nights she wakes up. I was glad we did it, and whilst she cried the first night, I felt less bad as we were trying to comfort her. However it's perfectly valid not to do anything and wait it out if that is best for you.

Thanks all, I think I am going to have to brave it and go cold turkey on the bottle, or at least sub for water. He's been quite slow on the uptake of weaning and still struggles with really lumpy food (he'll just spit it out), but I keep trying and he seems to finally be swallowing some finger food rather than just sucking it and throwing it on the floor! I just worry that he is genuinely hungry overnight, but my logical brain tells me that's probably not the case.

I just need to pick a time, he's going to childminder full time from next week, so I'll let him settle in first and then tackle it......

It seems he is probably hungry overnight if he's not eating much in the day. If you really want to go cold turkey in the night I would give move milk in the day.

I definitely would not suggest more milk in the daytime. We are talking a 12 month old here, not an early weaner. With the added issue of still on mushy food rather than proper food - it is the development of a healthy diet you need to be working on at this age.

The healthy diet of a child that is, not a baby. Milk shouldn't be a significant source of calories anymore. It's needed for nutrients and hydration. The child a calories should now be coming from the healthy diet they eat at meal times.

Milk is high calories compared to other drinks your 12 month old could have (water, squash, fruit juice). So the calories he takes from a night feed will be detrimental to the development of a normal healthy diet taken at meal times. Either that or could end up being the cause of weight gain long term, if meals daytime diet develops normally with the addition of unnecessary milk at night.

I should add the caveat that i wouod give very different advice if you were still giving night breastfeeds. Because night breastfeeds are more about comfort and less about calories.

But as bottle feeds, it requires a mindset change at 12 months old. Having spent all of the first 6 months and most of the second 6 months ensuring baby has enough milk - you now have to shift that focus to a healthy diet. Milk and dairy are part of that diet, but are no more or less important than all the other food groups. If you focus too much on milk and dairy, other aspects of a healthy diet may be affected.

Yes very good point FATE. I was just thinking if he isn't eating too much then he might be hungry? A friends child only ate bread and banana until she was 14 months whatever she tried, so the extra milk ( breast) was essential in that situation.

...although that was obviously desperate measures for one particular scenario! Not your average situation by any means.

If a child had a very restricted diet then I'd probably suggest speaking to a dietician. I doubt (although I could be wrong because I have no direct experience) a dietician would suggest more milk in that situation. It by-passes the need to make developing a healthy food-based diet non-optional.

I don't think the OPs child has an especially restricted diet from what is said. But it does sound quite babish as the child is going into the toddler years. Two other facts - that there are night feeds still regular and also that a baby bottle is used - come together to a situation that would say to me 'come on, it's time we moved on now'

Mine was months behind on weaning too, so I'm more tolerant of the night feeds than otherwise. Although she now eats more than me and still wakes often.. chronic ear inflections and teething also battle against us

If you're going back to work very soon I wouldn't try to change anything until he's settled. Sleep for mine got worse for about a month after he started nursery but then he was fine, slept through and never wanted a bottle anymore. I found it was a lot for him to cope with.

It's all very well saying they should have a healthy diet, but at one year old mine will not eat sufficient amounts by babyled weaning, and spits out all lumps

This was my son at 14 months! I weaned him off bottles onto cups first which took a week or two. He still woke up. Then came the night where I was brave and just offered water..he was furious and it was very hard he screamed his head off! But stayed with him the whole time and after one night he was hungry enough to eat a huge breakfast in the morning and his solid intake rapidly improved. He sleeps through most nights since only waking if he's ill/teething. No need for CC

I think by the time baby is 1 their diet and appetite should be starting to be self-limiting in order to find their natural weight and not over-eat or under-eat.

ie, the child eats the food they want and stop when had enough. If the child is especially small then any easy-calories I'd be giving would be in the form of easy-eat, high calorie foods, rather than supplementing a normal healthy diet (which includes milk, but as a drink rather than instead of food). That's obviously excluding children with medical or additional needs or very underweight individuals.

My youngest (fouth child) was born and maintained 91st centile weight line from birth. From about 9 months, when her diet became self-limiting, she quickly dropped to around the 50th centile and has stayed there. This is clearly her natural line. I didn't feel the need to supplement with extra milk on top of the normal milk she had in the daytime. She eats at meal times until she's full, so no more should be needed than that, surely?

None of this tackles when milk in the night is needed for comfort - those are very different issues to calorific need.

My eldest kept night feeds until 2y6m, they were her source of comfort. She was also a very early walker (7 months) which resulted in bow legs and pigeon toes. Her referral consultant told me I had to stop giving her milk at night because the weight gain as a toddler was hindering her legs correcting themselves. As soon as I stopped night time cow's milk she dropped straight down the centiles to an below 50th centile and stayed there.

"More calories" isn't a healthy mindset to have with a toddler, in the way it's necessary with a baby.

Thanks all, DS is just 12 months and eating food with lumps, as well as finger food. We didn't do baby-led weaning as he wasn't ready at 6 months. To be clear, he's no one purees anymore. If I let him feed himself (with his hands) he only eats a little bit then plays with the rest and throws on the floor when he gets bored. That's why we still spoon feed lumpier food, so he gets enough food to eat. Not sure how much milk he should be having at this age or how to get more food in him so he doesn't want anymore overnight.

Part of the problem is that when he wakes at night, in my desperation and exhaustion, I'll do anything to get him back to sleep. Invariably this is milk.

I will tackle this, but as someone else said, not until he's settled with the childminder when I go back to work. Dreading it.