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Sleep

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Original poster

10wk old waking after midnight

19 replies

Nicehooves · 30/08/2017 21:12

My bf and ff DS wakes up every 1 to 2.5hrs after midnight and it is killing me, please tell me what I'm doing wrong.

He goes down in his Sleepyhead around 8ish every night after a bottle of formula and sleeps anywhere between 4 and 6 hours.

The problem starts after this block, nothing I try keeps him asleep longer than 2 hours, last night he was only doing 1 hour at a time.
During the night he goes back to sleep really quickly if he's on the breast and once it gets to 3/4/5am I suspect he's mostly comfort sucking so I don't think hunger is driving this....

He's swaddled, sleeps next to me in a co-sleeper cot with a sleepyhead.
He mostly refuses the dummy (I've tried 5 different brands) and tends to suck on his fist instead.

I don't think he is overtired as he's getting 14 hours of sleep in total but he struggles to sleep alone during the day. If I really force him to sleep in his crib his daytime naps are often only 20 - 40 minutes so I often relent and let him sleep in the sling so he gets the sleep he needs. Is this just a self soothing problem or am I missing something?

Please help.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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SnugglySnerd · 30/08/2017 21:15

At 10 weeks he still won't know the difference between night and day. I'm afraid you probably just have to hang on in there and wait for him to grow out of it.

MetalMidget · 30/08/2017 21:17

I'm afraid that it sounds fairly normal for a 10 week old, to be honest! My son was waking every two to four hours until he was nearly one. He did have a brief period of sleeping longer at 12 - 16 weeks, but then the regression kicked in.

Original poster

Nicehooves · 30/08/2017 21:17

Arrgg I may not survive that long

OP posts:

TynesideBlonde · 30/08/2017 21:27

I've been there. Go short term survival mode- you need to go to sleep at 8 too. At least then you'll get a good block. Overnight comfort sucking is probably him ramping up your milk supply for next growth spurt.

Slings are awesome for encouraging daytime naps.

Have a read up on forth trimester if you've not heard the term before.

Keep the faith! One day you'll wake up and realise he hasn't woken up and totally freak out - I'm still waiting for my 4yo to do that but the second born mastered it quickly!

FATEdestiny · 30/08/2017 22:20

At this age feed at every single grumble. Feed, feed, feed, feed and feed some more.

Keep trying with the dummy, they are absolute game changers

Make sure baby burps at least once after every feed.

Original poster

Nicehooves · 30/08/2017 23:54

Thanks for the responses everyone. I have been going to bed early and trying to catch up on sleep but with 1 hour blocks I only just drift off before he wakes again. It is so frustrating and it appears to be getting worse instead of better. Tonight his first block only lasted 3 hours, I feel like crying. I know he can sleep longer than this as he's done it many, many times before.

OP posts:

crazycatlady5 · 31/08/2017 07:39

@Nicehooves it is exhausting isn't it it really won't last forever and hopefully you'll have some longer chunks soon. It is still really early days though and very normal, just feed feed feed and cosleep if you can.

pestov · 31/08/2017 08:19

Make sure you go to bed for the big sleep, even if it's at 8pm! A 4 hour stretch isn't too bad at this age, you can try waking him to push it later

Theducksarenotmyfriends · 31/08/2017 08:49

Sounds completely normal. You're lucky he does a 4-6 hour stretch at that age (mine never managed that until after 6 months!). The first 12 weeks are the toughest sleep-wise but you're doing really well and are nearly through the hardest bit!

welshweasel · 31/08/2017 08:54

Do you have a partner? If so, I'd make your bedtime 8pm feed a breastfeed, then you go to bed and leave baby with your partner. At their next waking they get a bottle of formula then settle in sleepyhead and bring up to bedroom once asleep. This saved my sanity as I wouldn't even wake up when DH and DS came up to bed and by the time he woke again I'd usually had about 5-6 hours uninterrupted sleep. DH then got to sleep 5-6 hours himself before he had to get up for work.

SnugglySnerd · 31/08/2017 09:40

Does he sleep in his pram? If so could someone take him for a long walk during the day while you get a decent nap?

FATEdestiny · 31/08/2017 10:22

Good suggestion by welshweasel, I'd definately swap that breastfeed and bottle feed around.

I only just drift off before he wakes again

Even without the added stressed of a new baby, this feeling of only just gone to sleep anx already woke again can be psychosomatic. There are some tricks and tips that can help you feel more rested, even if they in fact make no difference to your wake ups:

turn your clock around so you cannot see the time. Pay no attention to the time, just resettle or feed baby regardless.

don't count wake ups. Make a concious effort not to keep track. If asked how your night was, you need just think in terms of good night, bad night, ok night.

don't have your phone or any screens in the bedroom to use.

use an eye mask. The patting, shushing and cuddling to resettle don't require you to be able to see. The darkness should help get you back to sleep

assuming baby is right next to you in the cot, try ear plugs. They will block out external noise while still hearing baby cry or wake if he needs you

appreciate the value in lying in a quiet, dark room with nithing to do. Resting has value even when it's not sleep. Use this in the daytime too. If you get even 30 minutes to lie down and close your eyes, take it. Even if you just rest it will be beneficial. You may well fall asleep though.

there's no way of being certain (without the use of one of those wrist band sleep trackers) but you probably fall asleep much quicker than you think. I have always, always thought I take about 20-30m to go to sleep. Then recently I've started listening to audio books at bedtime. I am finding indisputable proof that im asleep within 10 mins, because any of the chapter past that I have no recollection of hearing.

welshweasel · 31/08/2017 10:27

Oh yes, earplugs. Drastically improved the quality of my sleep.

MetalMidget · 31/08/2017 15:29

I actually gave in and co-slept, breastfeeding lying down. Still tiring, but it meant that I was still able to function!

He sleeps through in his own cot now, better than I do!

Original poster

Nicehooves · 31/08/2017 18:46

Some great suggestions here. Thank you everyone, good to hear that this is normal. I have a few friends with babies around the same age and they are already sleeping through with a dream feed.

OP posts:

GurgleBoots · 31/08/2017 18:48

It's totally normal. TBH 4-6 months were the absolute worst sleep wise for us - at 8 weeks he was only waking once but by 11 weeks he was up hourly. It's developmental. Their sleep changes constantly at that age.

for you.

Gorgosparta · 31/08/2017 18:51

Op, i can promise at least a few of your friends are stretching the truth.

Honestly this is normal. Hang in there.

GurgleBoots · 31/08/2017 18:54

They might not be. Quite a few babies do sleep well at this age.

But it's very rare for it to stay that way, when they're this young pretty much everything is a phase.

SnugglySnerd · 01/09/2017 08:30

Have you tried white noise? You can download an app. We found the trick is to leave it on all night. It helps them to sett when the sleep cycles naturally wake them. We never did it with our first but it worked well second time around.

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