How do I get my 14 month old to settle for someone else?

[OhWhatAPalaver]

I am a bit stuck for what to do. Dd2 has always been more difficult to settle than dd1 - By this point my first was weaned off boob, sleeping through and self settling! - But because of reflux, wind and allergies dd2 has not had an easy time of things and has basically only ever known me (or my boobs) as her comfort. Now at 14 months I am tiring of the grabbing at my boobs, the sitting up in bed in the middle of night while she use me as a dummy, the teeth marks on my boobs etc etc... it's time to stop. But how can I when I am her only comfort? She has a teddy but doesn't have a particularly strong attachment to bit like dd1 did. She won't take a dummy. I don't really know what I'm supposed to do. If she doesn't have boob she will sometimes cry to the point of being sick, which is bloody awful, so controlled crying is s no-no. Please help!!

Have you tried the Pantley pull of, jay Gordon approach or this (which is essentially PPO too) - www.google.co.uk/amp/s/sarahockwell-smith.com/2014/08/10/how-to-gently-night-wean-a-breastfed-baby-or-toddler/amp/

None of which are really quick fixes but will minimise crying. Otherwise you could try just comforting for a few nights. You say she cries a lot with no boob, will she cry even when cuddled? What if you slept in another room and your partner settles in the night instead? I am 7 months in with a very high needs baby and already worried about weaning as and when!!

Good luck xx

How urgent is it OhWhatAPalaver?

It's ok to think I've had enough now and I want this to stop ASAP. There are ways to do this that do not involve leaving baby to cry alone. They almost certainly will involve crying though, but with you reassuring throughout.

It is equally ok to think I am ready to start taking steps towards independant sleep, but will go at a slow pace as long as we are moving in the direction of independant sleep.

The approach you take will depend on how quickly you want/need to get baby sleeping independantly.

Thanks for the tips, I'd say it's not that urgent but hoping to have stopped in a month or two.
I'll have a look in to the techniques, is one meant to be better than the other, ppo better than Jay Gordon or vice versa?
She is very fussy about what she wants at the moment. She doesn't even seem to want to do the bed time routine, she cries all the way through it until she has boob!!
She will happily fall asleep on dad in the daytime but at night she only wants me and no one else :/