Better napping...

[sadmum2017]

So I've posted here before, sad and desperate! But I feel like we're making some progress now. I would really just like some reassurance that we're getting somewhere.

DS is 13 weeks old, EBF and dislikes naps. Always has. After about 4-6 weeks he became chronically overtired, unhappy and we were clearly failing him with his sleep. He has been in his cot in our room at night since birth, and generally sleeps well at night, waking twice for feeds on average, sometimes just once. I feed him to sleep, and put him down in a grow bag. He does need some help after that as he is not self soothing yet. We use a clean pinkie finger as he has never liked a dummy much and while in the neonatal unit, the nurses used a pinkie to calm him. I know this is unusual, probably silly idea, but it works every time.

Naptimes are short, so I put him down after every 90 minute period awake, swaddled (he is very mobile during daytime sleep and woke himself up a lot). If we're out and about he often has to go longer, but otherwise I try hard to keep to this. He will sleep for 30-45 minutes, then I try to resettle immediately but if it doesn't work I just get him up again.

Is this good enough quality sleep during the day? Do you think he's getting at least a whole sleep cycle each nap? He does seem generally happier since I've been militant about the naps!

Is the pinkie finger method terrible and how can I stop it if so? He will take a dummy about 10% of the time when in his cot, usually after I've tricked him by slipping it in while using pinkie.

Will his naps naturally get longer or is there something else we should be doing?

Thanks

That sounds great, don't doubt yourself.

Being militant about naps is a great way to describe it, you're absolutely right in your timings and whatnot.

Sucking your finger is by no means terrible, but it is very definately parent-dependant. It will mean you are required for all naps, whereas a dummy is much more independant.

I'm guessing you are assuming that in the coming year you can wean off your finger into something else? The thing is, any change like that is going to be difficult and likely to be more difficult (ie involve more crying) the older baby is.

I don't hear of very many babies who take to a dummy adequately if it's not established before 5-6 months. So you may miss the boat with this even if you wanted to use one. If he was a thumb/finger sucker, you'd likely see signs of that already.

So if your aim is independant sleep, I'd swap your finger being sucked for something else. Otherwise you could be doing this for a long time to come. Being persistant and consistant with dummy use or baby sucking own fingers.

Yeah, I think we're going to have to wean him off the pinkie finger. That could be tricky. It's not always practical, and this was reinforced today while out with the pram!

I wouldn't worry, my 12 week old never naps for more than 20 minutes! She hasn't since week one! She feeds every 3 hours & sleeps 20 minutes within the 3 hour gap between feeds!

I've tried alsorts to get her to nap for longer but she just won't! But she just doesn't seem to need it very much. All babies are different, unless your LO is desperately unhappy all day, then they are probably fine! My LO gets very grumpy by 6/7pm & is ready for bed but the rest of the day seems fairly happy most of the time!

That's reassuring Bol. I used to think I was doing something wrong.

This week DS has decided that he doesn't like boobs unless it's night time So is feeding well every two hours at night, but refusing during the day. This makes mum not want to leave the house, or put clothes on.