At breaking point with nearly 15 month old

[Changerofname987654321]

I am really struggling with getting my nearly 15 month old to sleep. She has always been difficult to get to sleep but I feel it is getting worse and I can't deal with it anymore.

We have coslept since 6 months and the problem is getting her to sleep. We have a consistent routine, bath, supper with books down stairs and then sleep time. My husband and I take turns to bed time but it can take up to 1 1/2 and is not always successful to get her to sleep. We try singing, rocking, massage, story telling, pretending to go to sleep and sometimes going to sleep. We have recently gone to one nap which me limit to 2 hours waking her 2.30 and this seemed to improve things but not any more.

Sort for the long rambling message but I am just so fed up with this.

Have you tried just putting her in the cot with a favourite teddy and leaving the room? Im all for sleep crutches if they actually work but these dont seem to.

If she stands crying in her cot just repeatedly go in and lay her back down, quick pat on the back or hair stroke and out again. Repeat til asleep.

Is it possible she's over tired? At 15 months my DS was still having a morning nap of one hour and a sleep after lunch 1-3. They do say sleep begets sleeps...

Otherwise, consider a sleep consultant if you can afford it!

She was definitely ready to go to one nap a day but maybe she is tired as I am waking her from her nap but I think if she went to sleep earlier then she would not be tired.

I am tempted to put her back into her cot but I am worried that it will be worse. I think she would cry hysterically if I left her and I am not sure if I am up for that. But then the current situation can't continue.

With the drop in naps, is her bedtime routine earlier? If not bring it forward.

If my ds naps begin after midday then I know my evening is gone. Maybe an earlier nap and then bedtime won't take as long

Could having supper and books downstairs be making her more awake again rather than winding her down (bright lights, tv, toys and things that are more of a distraction now she's older)? Perhaps doing milk and stories upstairs with dimmed lights might help?

We have tried bringing bedtime earlier in line since she only has one nap but maybe not enough? We wake her at 7.00 in the morning, naps 12.30 to 2.30 and bed at 7.30.

We could experiment with a morning only nap.

We did used to do story books in bed but she started running around the bedroom and playing peekaboo with curtains. So we now do story time with low lights in the living with no toys or tv (we have separate playroom for playing) and that improved things for a short time. But we can try storytime in bed again.

She has not had milk before bed since 4 months ish as she would just not drink it.

I feel like we are always making little tweaks that improve things a little for a short time but not for long enough.

I went through this with ds1, I would just break down out of frustration, oh couldn't go out until we'd got him to sleep because I found it so stressful.

I'm sure you've tried all of this but it's a few things that helped us:

Having their room really dark.
Having a lullaby toy he can play with in bed which is comforting.
Dinner, bath, book then bed.
Talking bout the bed time routine throughout the day in a positive way.
Sleep promotes sleep, perhaps two shorter naps (but not less than 45mins each) with ds2 18m if he doesn't have an hour in the afternoon he doesn't go to bed easily.

I hope you find something that works for you.

Thanks for your kind words.

We don't talk about sleep but I do about other things we want to be less scary so thanks for mentioning your list.

I do think she is over tired at the moment as she has not been sleeping well during the night for about a month.

I think it is time to move her to her own room.