Helping my 10 week old get used to the cot

[Bubblesoup]

Hi all,

Dd2 is now 10 weeks old and after the chaos of the first few weeks I'm keen to start helping her get used to sleeping somewhere other than on me!

The biggest issue is daytime naps. To be honest it's been a big adjustment going from one to two children and DD1 is only 23 months. So I've been holding her when she wants to sleep and then putting her down somewhere safely on a couch where i can see her as i get on with jobs etc.
But she's disturbed by the noise of big sister playing and crashing around so doesn't sleep as long as I suspect she should. Also it's obviously only a short term solution. I'm really keen to get her used to napping in the cot. Big sister only ever sleeps in the car or buggy which is such a pain! I'd rather Dd2 is more flexible!
(We've also co-slept since birth because of wind issues and extreme sleep deprivation and although i enjoy it part of me wishes she'd sleep in her cot for at least part of the night.)

Anyway, anyone got any tips? I've set up the cot with a crib soother. And each time she falls asleep on me i put her down in there. But within 5 mins or so she's woken and is upset. Sometimes she wakes because her dummy has fallen out which is another issue!
I know i should probably be putting her down in there when she's drowsy but the trouble is she'll just cry and i would have to spend a lot of effort reassuring and picking her up to soothe etc. ....and big sister will find us and be loud and disturb the whole thing. I'm not willing to let her cry it out by the way.

I know there are no magic answers but just wondering if people have advice on what worked for them? I've been putting her in it to lie and watch me as i put washing away or get dressed, the idea being that she gets familiar with it and isn't nervous of it. She's a very sensitive baby, easily frightened and alarmed by unfamiliar surroundings.

Also, out of interest, where do/did your babies nap?

Thanks

I have absolutely no advice whatsoever, but I am in precisely the same boat. My DD2 is 10 weeks old and DD1 is 4. I am watching with interest, as I hope someone comes along to help us both! 🙂
Hope today is a good one for you.

"putting her down somewhere safely on a couch"

A couch is not a safe place to put a small baby down to sleep.

Do you have a pram/carrycot you could put her in when she is napping downstairs?

Have you tried swaddling her when you put her down in the cot? I haven't done that myself but I heard it can really help.

Another option is to get a Sleepyhead or similar, you can put it in her cot or on any flat surface. They're expensive but it worked for us.

Swaddle and a dummy?

www.lullabytrust.org.uk/safer-sleep-advice/

Baby should be having naps in the same room as you, until 6 months old. So if the cot is in a bedroom and not in the back of your living room, it's not the place for baby to sleep

Sleeping on the couch is also not safe.

If you want baby sleeping in somethibg static, it's going to require more effort from you. A crib or cot set up in your living room is OK. I would suggest a swaddle, dummy, and your hand on baby's chest with some shushing and patting until asleep.

This is unlikely to give you longer naps though. 30-45 minute naps are to be expected at this developmental stage. So Do you may need to invest half an hour to gettibg baby to sleep for a half hour nap, for example. This isn't a big deal, it's just the way it is.

I found naps in the bouncy chair much more practical and useful until 6 months. It means you can sit on the sofa, bouncer at your feet, four foot bouncing baby to sleep. This leaves your hands free to play with toddler. It is also less effort needed from you, you can still interact and play fully with your toddler from the sofa while simultaneously gettibg baby to sleep.

Naps in something that moves is also useful for extending naps. It makes lulling back to sleep easier. Great preparation for after 6 months old when you do move naps into thr cot upstairs.

I have a 4 month old and we also go for naps in the bouncy chair. As pp have said we don't leave him as per SIDS guidelines.

If you or your baby are not keen on swaddling, could also try tucking her in very tightly with the blanket when you put her down, almost like a swaddle as it holds their arms down so they don't constantly startle themselves with their flappy arms!

Other things to try...

• Warm up blanket by sitting on it
• Hot water bottle in crib and remove right before you put her in, so it doesn't feel so cold
• Rolled up towel in an arc under the fitted sheet so they feel more snug, like a cheap version of those sleepyhead/cocoon/nest thingies
• Rock the crib somehow, bit tricky if it's not a rocking one
• White noise... Try putting her down sleepy but awake and then do the hoovering! It sends mine to sleep Although he often wakes up once the hoovering stops.
• Pick her up, settle her, and put her back down again when she wakes up after the 5 mins in the crib, she may eventually settle... do it for daytime naps when it doesn't matter so much how quickly she falls asleep.

Even 5 mins in the crib once or twice a day will help her get used to it so don't give up!

Also my 6 week old sleeps on a sheepskin in his Moses basket at night, it's very soft and cosy, there is definitely a difference in his sleep when he sleeps on this compared to the other Moses basket we have downstairs without a sheepskin. I've researched online and they are supposed to be safe as long as baby sleeps on her back.

Thanks so much everyone! Really useful ideas and tips there! I actually didn't know that they are meant to nap in the same room as you until 6 months!!!
We live in a bungalow so she's not upstairs, just a few paces away. But even so, you've made me think that perhaps I'm silly to be trying to get her used to the cot already anyway! I think I'm feeling the pressure from others to be putting her into a routine and getting her sleeping somewhere other than on me/car/buggy which is what happened with DD1. I'm thinking now that perhaps I just need to go with the flow and let her sleep on me/buggy/car etc as she needs. Today I took both girls for an hour's walk in the buggy and they both slept and DD2 stayed asleep in the buggy for an hour after we got home!
I've also put the bassinet in the living room. I really am aware of the dangers of putting babies on a couch to sleep but cushions are removed and she's always been in my sight. But I'm going to try the bassinet instead.

Lovely that you have a 10 week old too BigFatGoalie (great name!! Haha!). It's nice to think of someone else in the same boat!!! Haha!

Bay Leaves thank you for all your tips! Definitely going to put some of those in place!

And thanks Fate, it helps to know that I should only expect naps of 30/45 mins at this stage. Although occasionally (like today) when she falls asleep in the buggy, she sleeps for 2 hours plus!!

(1) I pre heat his bed with a hot water bottle ( but t works!)

(2) I have rolled up towels and put them either side of his crib. it's like a budget sleepyhead. so he's squished in. loves it. sorry NHS guidelines but the more babying I do the more I take these with a pinch of salt/common sense tbh.

he hated the crib at first. we co slept for the first 6/7 weeks before my DP got in a strop (!) so I had to make a bit of effort.... it took a few nights of patience and failed/repeated 'drops' but he now goes to sleep in his crib (night time only, daytime is a whole other game he is winning!) with any complaint or ridiculousness (other than the nightly HW bottle)

hmmm I think I might have mixed my response up with a previous thread I read, sorry!

my
baby naps on my boob. sometimes he falls asleep in the pram (which he will now go in having sacked off the carrycot and put him in the big boy seat ((with more sausages to keep him straight)) ), sometimes in the car. but he only does these things when he feels like doing them and I would really like to find a proven way of getting f him to have regular daytime naps!

my
mum used a sheepskin for me and my siblings and she speaks very highly of it, despite being a vegan desperation, clearly!