Waaaaah! Help! toddler wails inconsolably at bedtime...my evenings are disappearing!

[FromDistantOphir]

DS is 2.5. I did sleep training with him when he was 7 months, and since then - bar the odd night - he's been an amazing sleeper.

Since last Monday though, he's been wailing and crying inconsolably when I put him to bed and leave the room. I can't handle the crying so I often go back in after about 8 - 10 minutes. Sometimes he grins when I go in. He might ask for water. I give it to him, kiss him and leave again. Whereupon the agonised wailing starts again.

I am at my wits end. I no longer get any evenings to relax/do chores etc. And he is going to sleep much later than is good for him (e.g. near 9pm).

What should I do? Should I just leave him to cry (like I did when I was sleep training him when he was a baby)?

I should mention that I put him in his proper bed for the first time last thursday, but I'm not sure its related to that as the incessant crying started last Monday, when he was still in his cot.

Any tips gratefully received!

Since last Monday....

If this is a very recent change, it would suggest a temporary problem. Illness or teething most likely. Second molars come through around 2 and a half.

I'd give extra attention and cuddles

Following as we're experiencing the same. I've put it down to separation anxiety.

Dd has been absolutely fine to put to bed - good routine, leave her in bed with her cuddlies and a nanight kiss.... off to sleep by herself with no issues.

She's 2 in a couple of weeks and since last Monday she's started freaking out at being left alone. Fine in lead up to bed and being tucked in but as soon as I go to leave she starts screaming, hops out of bed and runs after me.

If I put her back in bed she jumps straight back out. If I stay out of the room she gets hysterical. If I sit next to the bed she won't settle. She'll go to sleep on my lap but I don't want to establish that as a habit.

Don't know what to do!

I really don't think it's illness/teeth as he seems fine otherwise....

I'm desperate for a solution that's not going to make a rod for my own back. And a solution that's generally accepted to work in a lot of cases (e.g. controlled crying).

I appreciate that children are not robots (i.e. you input a solution and you get a predicted result), but some guidance as to what can and does often work would be most appreciated...

Gillian you say since last Monday....DS has been like this since last Monday too...

....what happened last Monday???? Was it an eclipse of the sun/moon that I didn't notice??

I let mine take a toy to bed and also check on him periodically-say I'll be back soon, also tell him there will be no stories tomorrow night if he doesn't lie down quietly. Also tell him he can have x number of stories as long as he promises to go to bed quietly. He's 3 and a half now but started this caper when he was about 2 and a half.

FromDistantOphir
Yep, a completely sudden change. Must be some mystical planetary alignment!

Let's hope the stars / moon / whatever realign again soon 😁

Does he still nap? Maybe he's not tired when you want him to sleep?

thanks Zumba, I will try that...

muggin Yes, he does. And maybe I should curtail his nap so that he is more tired in the evening... the slight problem is that he often goes hell for leather in the morning, especially on days at home (as opposed to nursery), where he can often spend all morning gallivanting in the park so he is absolutely shattered come lunchtime and early afternoon and really needs to sleep then