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FATEDestiny,are you around? Need your help!

4 replies

JustMumNowNotMe · 16/07/2017 19:26

I seriously need your help if you are. Or anyone else who's been in this random situation!

DC3 is 7 months. Until recently was a dream to get to sleep, just lay him down with his dummy in and a muslin and he went off by himself.

For the last two weeks however, its all gone to shit. He constantly rolls, its like a compulsion. Back, side, front, back, quickly and over and over again.He can't fall asleep as he can't keep still, when he finally exhausts himself (with us patting him etc) which can take hours, he passes out for a couple of hours then the rolling starts again! Hes so upset, because he's so tired but he literally cannot stop doing it. Its not as though hes just learnt to roll, hes been doing it ages so why now?!

I'm at my wits end as from midnight onwards he cannot keep still so I can't go to sleep, i spend all night trying to settle him instead til he gets up for the day at 5

Naps are the same, so I've resorted to putting him in the pram and rocking him to sleep so he can't roll, but this means his previously 60-90 min naps 3x per day are now really short so hes permanently exhausted Sad

Any ideas?? I'm back at work in 2 weeks, stressed is an understatement!

Thank you in advance!!!!

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JustMumNowNotMe · 16/07/2017 20:05

@FATEdestiny

OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 16/07/2017 21:10

Its not as though hes just learnt to roll, hes been doing it ages so why now?

It's just that he's got good at it now. It's a really common and usual phase to go through.

Just to make you feel even worse (sorry!) They usually go through similar phases to this when rocking on all-fours (precurser to crawling) and the hardest to deal with is us when they learn to pull to standing. In fact I'd go so far as to say if you don't crack this before pulling to standing it becomes intimately harder to solve at all.

The key skill you are aiming to teach is: in order to go to sleep you must be still.

Consider the logic in this so that you know you are right in teaching it and don't doubt yourself when teaching your baby. Some very basic needs when going to sleep are to be still, quiet and calm. No one can relax their body enough to go to sleep without first being still, quiet and calm.

Some children go still, quiet and calm naturally when tired. Most babies I know don't do this naturally. They are like spaniel puppies in that way. So I would go through a process of physically teaching baby to be still.

This will involve a lot of hands-on presence from you. Firm hand on chest/back in the cot. Maybe holding child a hands on one of yours over their chest if arms are waving around. Second hand can hold legs still if needed.

The firm hand is not about restraining the baby. It is about encouraging stillness and discouraging movement, but not about fighting against them.

So if the squirming against you gets to feel like baby is fighting against you, lessen where your hands are and see if baby is looking to shuffle and change position. If settling into a new position, put hand back on chest/back/side (depending on position) and continue to encourage stillness and discourage movement by holding still in the cot.

If the squirming which results in you listening your hold on baby and it isn't a shuffle baby is after, it is flapping around and trying to get up etc - this is what you are teaching baby he needs to not do. So i wouod lift baby slightly and lie back down immediately. Like a reset button to show that all this moving is not meant for bedtime. That bedtime mean:

  • Still
  • Quiet
  • Calm

Keep noise to a minimum. Keep your movements to a minimum. Just be reassuring and consistant that baby needs to still. Remember that baby simply cannot go to sleep with this amount of moving, so the stillness lesson you are teaching is necessary and vital. Remembering this will help you stay consistant.

As I said, you'll solve this and it will reappear when rocking on all-fours starts. And again when standing. So this technique may need to be revisited several times.

I should just add that another way to solve this is full body cuddling when cosleeping, ifcthats your thing.

And the same technique is likely to be needed for daytime naps as well as bedtime and any wake ups. But it should be short lived. If you're consistant you can usually solve the stillness thing within a month, often within a couple of weeks.

drinkyourmilk · 16/07/2017 23:18

This is interesting to read as this evening I've stopped swaddling my baby as her Moro seems to have all but gone now. She does spend a lot of her time boofing herself in the head and scratching at herself etc. So I've instinctively been providing a barrier close to her body to discourage the hand wafting. Looks like I'm doing the right thing!

JustMumNowNotMe · 17/07/2017 05:46

Thank you so much for getting back to me! This is my third child, why haven't I been through this before?!

All good advice and will follow it now. Tried full body cuddling but he doesn't like it so made him more upset bless him.

Fingers crossed it won't last too long .....beofre the next phase starts 😂

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