Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Original poster

14 month old wakes between 3 -5 am every morning! 😫

33 replies

Katd31 · 12/07/2017 14:59

Can anyone offer any advice on what to do? At the moment we put him to bed at 7.30 ish and he sleeps right through but will always wake up full of beans normally around 4.30. I'm knackered! This morning I fed him back to sleep at 4.45 and he slept again till 6.45.. this is the first time that's ever happened. I feel like this is his natural wake up time

Thanks for any help!

OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 12/07/2017 20:17

I would always treat it as a night wake. If a bottle gets baby back to sleep quickly, I'd just do that.

TittyGolightly · 12/07/2017 20:19

You can't usually get both ends. Put him to bed early and you're going to have an early start. (my DD would go to bed between 11pm and midnight at that age and sleep till 10:30-11:30am).

Tatlerer · 12/07/2017 20:39

I know several people who 'get both ends' and a target of 7/7.30pm-7/7.30am is perfectly reasonable for babies and children.
I'm with FATE, treat it as a night waking. Keep lights low, feed if you want to (although I probably wouldn't), consider investing in a Gro-Clock (I started using one with DD around that age as she was waking nearer 6 than 7 and it sorted that right out!)

TittyGolightly · 12/07/2017 20:44

I wouldn't have wanted DD awake at 7am or 7:30am! Double figures suited us nicely!

Tatlerer · 12/07/2017 20:52

Fair enough tilly. It's quite unusual though- most people have to get up for work and the kids for school (when older, obviously). But if it works for you then fine!

TittyGolightly · 12/07/2017 20:55

Yes, people kept saying that.

Both DH and I are owls so no surprise that DD is too. And getting up for school has been fine (she's 6). She's up at 7:45am and at school by 8:15am.

Original poster
Katd31 · 12/07/2017 21:03

Thanks v much for all your replies. It's good to hear everyone's advice. Smile

OP posts:
Believeitornot · 12/07/2017 21:03

The birds are fecking noisy at that hour and if they're cold or teething then they wake easily. It's like a gradual waking then hard for them to sleep again.

Mine always were ready for bed at 7pm ish but we had hellish periods of early wake ups. However they were tired later in the day so it was not enough sleep for them.

We just persevered and they learned. Now they're asleep by 730pm and wake at 630/7.

Original poster
Katd31 · 12/07/2017 21:04

I'm going to treat it as a night waking from now on I think!

OP posts:
Nicae · 12/07/2017 21:07

Titty has her own special views on children's sleeping and bedtimes. Both my girls (DD1 is 2 and a half, DD2 is 16 months) are in bed between 7 and 7.30pm and they very much need to be (even if they don't always want to be!). Older one sleeps til 6.30ish, younger is a terrible sleeper and wake up time is very varied but she often wakes in the early hours. We treat it as a night time wake and aim to get her back to sleep, this can mean sitting with her for an hour or more - it doesn't always work but I want her to get the idea that 4.30am isn't morning!

RubaDubMum89 · 12/07/2017 21:14

I have the same with DD. She's 7.5months and wakes between 5-6am. It's usually closer to 5. She goes to bed anywhere between 6.30-7.30pm most days, sleeps through (occasionally grumps 1 or 2 times in the night until someone goes and puts her dodie back in). I've always treated it like a night waking when she's up (she doesn't cry to start with, just gurgles, shouts, rolls about making all kinds of noises). I go in with the bottle, feed, avoid eye contact and verbal stimulation then put her back down and leave. 1/10 times she may go back to sleep for an hour, hour and a half (in fact I'm not entirely sure she does, she may just be in there playing and I've gone out like a light and slept through it). I would absolutely love to see 7am from the right side again! At the moment I'm a SAHM so usually have an afternoon nap with her, but this won't be able to happen forever! Blush I miss sleep. So much haha

TittyGolightly · 12/07/2017 21:16

What worked for us isn't what works for you. So what? There's this weird societal expectation of children needing to sleep 7-7. They're all individuals so that doesn't work for every child. You don't have to travel far to find countries where my approach is more normal, either.

I certainly never found myself needing to persuade her not to wake for the day in the small hours, so that's at least one upside!

RubaDubMum89 · 12/07/2017 21:33

titty I'm genuinely jealous you had a routine that worked for you and got/get enough sleep! My lack of sleep is ageing me! I'm going grey and I'm only bloody 27! Haha!

FATEdestiny · 12/07/2017 22:02

he slept again till 6.45.. this is the first time that's ever happened. I feel like this is his natural wake up time

That would be about right for a natural wake up time for a 7.30pm bedtime.

11h over night sleep is average, with a 10-12h range being normal. So a 7.30pm bedtime will give you a natural wake up time of 5.30-7.30am, with 6.30am being about average.

Personally we favoured an 8pm-7am night, just because that works for us as a family.

Billi77 · 12/07/2017 23:20

Titty I am so jealous! I had a 9.30-8.30 phase and have managed 11-10 whilst in Europe and felt very square taking DD home as others partied till dusk. When is Rome...

Believeitornot · 13/07/2017 07:00

There's this weird societal expectation of children needing to sleep 7-7

Is there really? I don't think it's weird. Schools start at 9am so children can hardly be sleeping in until 8.45.

You may also have got lucky with a child that slept well.

Believeitornot · 13/07/2017 07:06

I'll always also add we tried getting ds to sleep later as he just wouldn't settle as a baby. But he naturally got tired at around 7pm as a baby. Even now as a school child both he and dd like to be in bed and asleep by 8pm at the latest. Otherwise they go loopy. Nothing weird about it.

TittyGolightly · 13/07/2017 07:16

Babies and toddlers don't go to school. Hmm. Why would it take 2 hours (7am till 9am) to get a child up and out to school?

My DD was almost 4 when she started school full time. We all hate early starts but she'd adjusted to the new routine - without any stressing or fuss from us - within a week or 2. At 6 she sleeps soundly from around 9pm till 7:45am, which works for us (I don't get home from work till gone 6:30pm and DH can often be working later.)

TittyGolightly · 13/07/2017 07:18

But he naturally got tired at around 7pm as a baby. Even now as a school child both he and dd like to be in bed and asleep by 8pm at the latest. Otherwise they go loopy. Nothing weird about it

That's completely different. If that's their natural bedtime then great! I said there was a societal expectation - so there are parents struggling to get their baby/young child to sleep at 7pm because they think that is what they should do. That's the bit that's weird!

Believeitornot · 13/07/2017 11:33

My point was that you're making a sweeping assessment that 7-7 is weird and your way is more normal.

Babies and toddlers with older siblings will most likely get woken up earlier.

What I think is that we have routines and if we need to get dcs up earlier then getting a DC to bed at 7pm is normal and quite right.

TittyGolightly · 13/07/2017 12:19

My point was that you're making a sweeping assessment that 7-7 is weird and your way is more normal.

That is not what I said.

Our way was natural - i.e. Suited us and our lifestyle if not that of wider society (e.g. Cbeebies stops at 7pm, most soft play, museums etc close early). The idea that a baby needs to be sleeping at 7pm because they might one day go to school is just bizarre to me, but was a common comment made when DD was small.

FATEdestiny · 13/07/2017 13:27

If I had only 1 child and did not need to get up for work, I would prefer a 9am wake up so would go with a later bedtime with a pre-nursery age toddler. There's nothing wrong with that it just doesn't fit our larger family with more needs to be accommodated.

The boy across the road from us is nearly 8, like my son. They play together all the time. On non-school days, at a time I'm calling DS in to be getting ready for bed (7.30pm), the boy across the road is being called in for his dinner, and won't be going to bed for at least another 2 hours.

The main reasons for these wildly different daily routines is that the lad across the road is an only child so can easily develop a more adult-like routine of eating later, bed later, wake up later. It's not so straight forward in our house since the needs of four children have to be accommodated in our daily routine.

That's not to say there is anything wrong with a later bedtime, I'd definately adopt that if I could.

Tatlerer · 13/07/2017 13:58

We're a one-child family though FATE and unless we retire soon (not going to happen) getting up later still wouldn't work for us, bar the weekend of course! DH needs to be at work by 8/8.30, me by 9, DD at breakfast club by 8- so 7am is a keeper in this house for some time to come!

FATEdestiny · 13/07/2017 14:18

I did say if I had only 1 child and did not need to get up for work... I definately appreciate life gets in the way for most to be able to get away with late morning wake ups.

It's not relevant to the op anyway since she seems quite with a 6.45am morning, just unhappy with the 4.30am wake up. It's a complete tangent in the conversation.

FATEdestiny · 13/07/2017 14:19

quite happy*