Why does he scream every evening??

[LillyBugg]

My five week old has started screaming each evening and it's driving me nuts. It's starts anywhere between 8 and 10. It then goes on until midnight (honestly it's like he has a watch, he gives in around 11.45/12 ish every night). This has been going on for a week now.

I've tried cuddling, feeding, bouncing in a chair, pre empting tiredness with going to bed earlier and swaddling (although it's a bit hot for that).

Any thoughts? He's so good during the day, a bit of a Velcro baby but I don't mind. Then it's like he is a different child come bed time.

We are both knackered, and have DS1 to look after as well so please no 'sleep when the baby sleeps' advice!

It's probably colic. Does this sound familiar...?

www.nhs.uk/conditions/Colic/Pages/Introduction.aspx

Both ny DDs did this. They do grow out of it but it's pretty draining while it lasts, not least because that's the time of day when you're probably feeling tired and fractious too!

Hang in there. It will pass

Sounds like colic. 🙁 mine had this too. You sound like you are doing all the right things. Have you tried baby massage? Worked for us. If you are bottle feeding then you could try anti colic milk and dr browns bottles. It does pass and get better but it's so hard! Xx

Some baby massage tips.

Yep, mine was exactly the same and it was colic.

Baby massage for colic relief and colief from GP helped.

He's breastfed and doesn't do this screaming at any other time of day. Could it still be colic if it's literally only one time of the day? He does go very red when screaming, it does last a few hours but he doesn't draw his knees up or arch his back.

Dare I ask how long colic lasts for...? And tips on how to help if he's breastfed? I can try the tummy massage.

It's almost like he's tired as he will often start to drop off and then out of nowhere he screeches and is wide awake again.

Have a read through the info on the link I posted but yes, colicky crying is usually late afternoon/evening, and they grow out of it by 4-6 months and then they start teething

Really not unusual to have evening screaming. They do grow out of it. It's usually because of a build up on over tiredness from awake times through the day and a desire to feed constantly ready for the night ahead.

The very best way to deal with this is to just give in.

Accept and plan for the fact that from 7-8pm ish through to bedtime you will be doing nothing but sitting on the sofa with a baby on your lap.

Just organise your day accordingly - get everything you need to get some earlier. Or let them wait until morning. Get anything that must be done then done as quickly and efficiently as possible, accepting the fact that baby will probably cry through out you doing it.

Then just park yourself on the sofa, top under your armpits (or off) and just keep shifting baby between one breast for ages, the other breast, asleep in your arms, repeat repeat repeat.

Baby does grow out of this. It won't be for very long and it is a normal thing that happens to most breastfed babies. I just wouldn't fight it. Accept it as the ways things will be for a couple of months.

Thanks for all replies!

Hi fate, thought I might see you here. In all honestly I'm happy to just sit on the sofa and feed feed feed through this but I can't. He doesn't really want to feed, or he does but he starts and then keeps pulling off the breast and wailing his heart out. I could understand if it was a case of him crying when I put him down, in which case I would happily sit up with him until he's ready to settle. But it's not, he gets really really worked up and I can't find anything to help him settle. Sitting, standing, bouncing, laying, nothing seems to work

Have you tried a dummy?

Oh, and congratulations

Yes he's had a dummy since day one. It's oh so different second time around lol!

If feeding isn't wanted then it's going to be needing to find a way to get baby sleeping. I find battling against the screaming and fighting to get baby into a swaddle is the most effective way to calm a screaming newborn. Then rock/sway baby in swaddle with dummy.

Worth also to consider minimising wind pain. So wind effectively after feeds and any screaming periods (crying makes baby swallow air). Try sleep positions that raise baby's head above the stomach (bouncy chair does this, or sleeping on your shoulder or raising one end of the cot/crib)

Thanks Fate. I've been consciously trying to get more wind up today to see if that makes a difference. So I'll stick with that. I'll see if I can keep him propped up this evening as well. I would normally swaddle but honestly it's so hot and when he's screaming he gets even hotter so I just feel that this isn't an option right now.

I crossed paths with a midwife today who suggested perhaps it was slow milk flow leading to frustration. She said about expressing a bottle in the morning to give around 10pm. Any thoughts on this?

It depends on your plans regarding feeding. If you are very precious about exclusively breastfeeding and it's important to you, then there is more benefit in just breastfeeding more to up your supply.

If you are less previous about it, are happy to breastfeed while it works, or mix feed, or indeed formula feed - then getting baby used to occassional bottles is a useful thing to do early. It may mess with your supply though.

My personal view is that if baby is gaining weight well, I'd just breastfeed through it in these early weeks. I find that the process of expressing puts unnecessary extra pressure on yourself. Then the process of giving a bottle at a time you could be breastfeeding is likely to harm your supply.

I didn't think of supply issues. I'm quite precious about breast feeding to be honest. More because I find it easier than bottle prep! I might try and express tomorrow (DS actually already took a bottle of ebm last week as I had to express) but then breast feed him first in the evening before offering the bottle.

Today I've definitely noticed more wind has come up as I've winded him longer. We've had the bouncy chair on its highest setting. Had a warm bath. He is currently dozing on me sat up on the sofa. It's still early though...I don't want to be too hopeful!!

Well he went to sleep at eleven, without the usual pre screaming!! Hurrah!

So today I'm going to stick to extra winding and keeping him propped up where possible. I might express a bottle this morning if I have time. I so so so hope it wasn't a one off.

Thanks for all the advice, and keep it coming if anything has been missed!

Yeah! Great news.

Hope it goes well today too.

Boooo screaming again tonight...hope it doesn't go on too long

It's early days. Just do whatever baby needs in the moment. The answer to most issues in these early weeks is

More milk
More sleep
Better winding
Swaddle
Dummy