Is there some way to get my 5.5 month old into a sleep routine?

[ForeverYawning]

My DS is 5.5 months old now and although his sleep at night time has improved vastly, I still feel completely at a loss with what I'm doing with him regarding naps and bedtimes and wake up times in the morning!
He has absolutely no routine surrounding when he will go down for a nap, I'm finding his tired cues more and more hard to read so recently I don't know if I've been putting him down for naps too early because he fights going to sleep like a child possessed! I would say his normal wake time at the minute is something like 1 hour to 1.5 hours and then he starts getting irritable and overtired but some days even though he is tired I can't get him to nap for about 3-4 hours! His nap times also vary from 30 mins to 2.5 hours! So in the evening I try to put him down to bed at 6 - 6.30 but recently he has taken up to 2 hours to fall asleep as he's just learnt to roll onto his belly but can't roll back so gets angry and cries. He will then wake only once or twice during the night, maybe at 11.30/12 and then again at 3.30/4. He then wakes up at 6.30am. Some days he will go back to sleep after a bottle at 7am and sleep for another 2 hours, other days he won't go back to sleep until about 9.30am! Is this normal for their sleep patterns to be so erratic or am I doing something wrong? He has bad reflux so I can't get him to nap in his cot on his back, only in his car seat.
Sorry for a very long winded post thats a bit rambley.. I'm very sleep deprived so probably not making a lot of sense! I just feel like I have no idea what I'm doing anymore and still can't get a hang of this parenting thing!

With nap lengths so variable, you need a degree of flexibility for awake time between naps. It is reasonable to expect 60-90 minutes awake time if the previous nap was 30 minutes. Whereas if the previous nap(s) were 2h plus, then awake times of 2, 3 or 4 hours are all reasonable.

Predictability of naps is best developed in a baby-led way. And predictability starts with a set wake up time

Morning wake up needs to be set in stone (for now, not for forever) and wants to be the same 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Every day. So it sounds like 6.30am is the natural wake up for your baby. So use that.

This means at 6.20am every day you set an alarm and at 6 30am you are lifting baby from the cot and going downstairs. Very soon breakfasts will start - that will keep him alert and awake. No bottle and resettle back down first-thing - up and getting on with the day.

A routined morning will then give you a routined first nap. I would aim for 8.30am for the first nap. If baby isn't keeping eyes open earlier than that then 8am would be ok, but no earlier and try for 8.30am (exactly 2h awake time).

I know you said daytime naps are in the carseat, but I'd try for at least this first nap in the cot, same as night sleep. The first nap is usually easiest and car seat naps are not feasible long term anyway.

Then begins your degree of flexibility. Depending on how long the nap is will dictate how long the next awake time needs to be. But in time, with a routined start time to the nap you will start to notice a routine awake time. It might be a 9.30-10 wake. Or maybe 10-10.30. But a baby led pattern will start to immerge.

Once you have some predictability to the first nap, set it with more strict timings like wake up and first nap time. So if baby ususlly wakes from an 8.30am nap at 9.30-10, start waking baby at 9.30am every day.

You now have routined timings of 6 30am wake and 8.30 - 9.30 nap (or whatever works for your baby, this is just an example). You can then start setting the next nap. Maybe a 2h awake time works, maybe a 3h. Say you find 2h awake suits. With a strict 9.30am wake time, it means next nap becomes exactly 11.30am. And so the process continues....

It all starts from a routined morning.

I'm just posting as I'd like to follow this thread.....I'm in exact same position only mine are twins and they are a few days off being 6 months!