Our bed is too comfy!!!!!

[mellongoose]

DD is 2 years and 9 months. In Jan we went on hols, ditched the dummy and removed bars from cot. A lot for her to cope with all at once and sleep went hay wire!

She would not stay in her cot bed. Bed times became a battle and she came wandering into us at all times of the night.

After getting some great advice here, I put the bars back on. Bed times are generally better again as I stay with her, or potter about upstairs so she can hear me. BUT she wakes in the night and wants to be in our bed. Cries and screams until I give in.

Am currently leaving a lamp on in her room and we have recently changed her room around- she chose where her cot went etc.

She says she's scared, so we have been through what of etc. Monsters are just made up etc (don't know where she's seen monsters even)! We've talked about things that real and things that are made up etc. I can only conclude that our bed is warmer and comfier!!!

Any ideas?!

Your bed has you in it - that is what makes it so attractive!

Is this just every now and again, or every single night?

Every now and again I would just make concessions. I'd stick a travel cot up in the corner of your bedroom and offer it as the only alternate to her room. But only if this is a rare, occassional occurance.

(Children are always going to have off nights here and there, so no point over thinking it, just get everyone as much sleep as poss is what I do)

However if it is every night, that's a completely different matter. It will be learnt behaviour because you've not set boundaries. If you 'give in' every night then she will learn that she just has to continue the battle until you give in.

It will take you to absolutely not give in. Be consistant - anally so. Ruthlessly returning her to bed over and over and over again without ever giving in. I'd say it would be sorted within a week and settled within 3 weeks.

Only once you have those strict "your bed at all times until morning" can you assesses her being scared or whatever. These might all just be excused she tried to get in your bed. She needs to first know she's not going to get to go in your room under any circumstances, then these 'issues' may vanish.

Thanks FATE. It's every night I'm sorry to say. I've never been one to leave her to cry I'm too soft so I've made a rod for my own back.

FWIW she also wants to go in our bed when we are down stairs!! She was okay with having my pillow in her cot for a bit but that seems to have worn off.

Deep breath. I'm not looking forward to the next week but needs must. It will benefit her in the long run.

Thanks again.