How to cope with a colicky baby

[MelvinThePenguin]

DD2 is 6 weeks old and we're finding her really difficult. The lack of sleep is really getting to us.

DD1 has just turned 2. At 6 weeks she was sleeping 10pm-6am with one feed somewhere in the middle (after which she'd go straight back to sleep). By 8 weeks, she had dropped the feed. She rarely cried and was generally a delightful baby.

DD2 takes hours to go to sleep. We finally get her off between 11pm and 12pm only for her to wake at 1:30am, 4:30am and 6:30am. She'll be awake for at least an hour and sometimes more than 2. She will just cry if put down/held in one position for too long. She only seems to like being rocked and even then, only if I'm standing up.

My husband and I take the feeds in turn. We've tried gaviscon (has reduced her crazy sickness somewhat), the drops that break down lactose (has reduced her awful flatulance, swaddling, dummies...nothing works for sleeping.

Infuriatingly, my Mum has had her twice overnight while we've stayed in the same house. Both times she just woke up once and went back to sleep within 45 mins.

I feel like a total failure.

It's really really tough. We had it with Ds.

Do you think it could be reflux related? Ranitidine worked wonders for Ds. Is your health visitor any good?

In terms of the immediate- dh slept on the sofa and stayed downstairs with Ds until midnight or 1am and I went to bed at 7 or 8;to get my sleep in beforehand. Obviously that would only work if you're bottle of feeding. If breastfeeding you could wake for feeds and hand baby back over for dh to take back downstairs. We played divide and conquer as much as we could. We wouldn't have survived the colic otherwise.

Hope you're ok

The reluctance to be laid flat could also be reflux as it allows the acid to come back up. Try propping the Moses basket so it's tilted

Thank you. I'm mostly fine, but do find myself getting very cross during the night. I'm starting to get into the irrational 'this is never going to get better' headspace though!

My husband is brilliant. DD2 is bottle fed and we do share the night shift. He sleeps in the spare room. He has a bit more patience than me, but is also mightily frustrated. He just googles potential solutions all the time and throws money at things.

Possibly reflux related. I had to fight the GP we saw last time just to get Gaviscon though, as she's putting on weight no problem. He was very patronising and started with 'is this your first baby?' I don't think I'd get anything else.

She is now asleep after 2.5 hours. So exhausting.

My Mum just tells me this is payback for my colic as a baby. Not helpful!

She's outgrown the Moses basket! Her cot mattress has towels under it though to prop her up!

Hi

Hope you are ok - it's tough going. I have just come out of this and found it really tough. I wasn't too shocked as my first had it too :(

Mine went from about 5 weeks til 8 weeks and then tailed off. Mine also slept similar to what you are saying with 2.5 hrs being the max sleep.

I didn't find a magic answer but all I did was tried to make sure he didn't get over tired. Very hard with a toddler to be fair as they keep waking them up or taking your attention when it's needed. I did the bouncing seat and dummy thing.

When the colic was awful - screaming I found that if I put him in the bouncing seat. Put my face right up to his and did a really loud shhhhh sound (like really loud) he looked at me and eventually relaxed a bit. This might be unique to mine and I did have a lot of crying per evening. Started at exactly 7 lol! I also had a couple of bouts in the night and one in the day.

You need to keep calm (for your sanity) and I used music to do that - either ear phones or loud in my lounge. I even had my music on one night at 4am and went down to make myself a tea etc just to keep it together.

How are you now? Mine is now 11 weeks and isn't doing it at all but I have to keep ontop of the over tired sleep.

Take care I feel for you xx

Thanks. It's great to hear from people who have come out of the other side! She's been like this for about 3 weeks. I really hope that this is better by the magic 12 weeks!

I was able to sleep in until 10am this morning. I definitely married the right man! He got sent back to bed once I was up.

Bouncy chair and shushing have both been deployed over the last few weeks! The latter just made her usual whingey cry become a full on scream. Eek!

It all feels better during the day. I'm not in PND territory or anything like that. I came close for a short while with DD1, but that was because I hated breast feeding.

Ugh, this is hard!

Help!! Think we might be joining the colicky baby thread!! LO is only 17 days old but all if a sudden screaming at night, pulling legs up, can't be settled. Takes ages to wind - usually over an hour. Is this colic???? Do any different bottles/teats/formula male a difference? Sooo tired

So sorry I missed your reply Iusuallylovecake. I hope things are better now.

We discovered that DD2 has a cow's milk protein intolerance. The giveaways were the explosive nappies and mild rash/dry skin on her face. She is now on prescription formula and a different baby. She's 9 weeks and coos away at me, waking only once in the night between about 10:30pm and 8:30am.

I expect we were lucky to find an explanation (although obviously not lucky that she has an allergy, though she should grow out of it). However, I thought I should update in case this helps anyone in the future.

Hi, I'm going through exactly the same sort of thing but only breast feeding and also dealing with a tongue tie. Just wondering if you could tell me a bit more about Feb intolerance? What symptoms were there? How did you get a diagnosis? Thank you x

Hi Poppydm.

My understanding is that it's unusual for an ebf baby to show signs of a cow's milk protein intolerance, but not impossible.

I mentioned to our GP at the 6 week check that we were having to protect ourselves against flying poop when we changed DD's nappy. Honestly, my legs got covered even though they were some way from the edge of the changing mat. It would also come out of her nappy and all the way up her back.

The GP then checked for rashes. DD had a slight one around her mouth and cheeks and some dry skin around her eyebrows, but I think most also have rashes in the nappy area (mine didn't). GP then thought it could be CMPI.

The formal diagnosis comes after using prescription formula for a couple of weeks. I don't know what would happen with an ebf baby.

Our DD's explosive nappies stopped immediately, the dry skin and rash cleared up in a couple of days and the colic went within 4-5 days.

There won't always be as straightforward an explanation as this, but I firmly believe you should trust your instincts if you think something is amiss. We're also very lucky to have a GP who is a new mum herself and really listens to every word I say (even the ones I think are insignificant). She's usually running behind, but totally worth the wait!

Thanks for adding your experiences melvin any insights are gratefully received!!
We went to go for ideas/help and we're told to suck it up and get on with it!!!! Helpful!!!
Interesting about the rash as LO has a spotty rash all over face and v dry skin. Going for 6 week check next week with different gp so will see what they say
Colic has moved to 3am until about 6am for it's worst attack so still very much an issue! Dr Brown's bottles doing nothing for us!!! Def need more help as actually feel dizzy from tiredness now! Good luck to anyone else going thru it!

Grrr can tell auto correct and lack of sleep!! We went to gp for advice not go obviously!!!

My ebf dc4 had cmpi, diagnosed when i was enough is enough ive done too many babies and this isnt right and went to the drs. I had to go dairyfree and everything settled within days. Hes now 23 months and can eat dairy after a gentle reintroduction at 12 months, the only lasting problem we have is he has a very good gag reflex (as in brings everything up) if he has a slight cough removing any food thats gone down wrong.

Ds1 was colicky but we managed with a combination of things.

Colief drops, which you mentioned, and we changed him to aptimil easy digest, which made the colic better but the nappies worse. We also used dr brown bottles.

The doc tried us on prescription formula once (can't remember the name). That was the worst. He was in agony with it.

In contrast, his brother probably could have digested a vindaloo at a week old. Feeding ds2 was a breeze.

I remember a really nice midwife saying to me after that when pg everyone hopes the baby won't have such-and-suches nose, but nobody prays for a strong digestive system. I made a point of doing so with ds2.

My ebf DS had awful colic but here is how we approached it and so far things are much better.
Saw GP who advised that it could be silent reflux or colic- prescribed Gaviscon, tried but no great results
Infacol- tried but no effect
Coilef- tried and some improvement
Reducing lactose levels in my diet- tried and significant improvement
Craniosacral therapy- tried and significant improvement
Biogia probiotic drops- significant improvement
Winding- midwives advised that a breastfed baby didn't need winding but we now know that to be nonsense and regularly wind DS after feeds or as necessary, some improvement

As regards lactose I still have a little bit and am already on a calcium and vitamin D supplement but prior to changing my diet (I also have no caffeine and only the odd fizzy drink) I did love snacking on cheese, just cheese and biscuits for supper and lovely ice cream. To avoid triggering an intolerance I initially had no lactose then built up to a little bit.

For us a combination of things worked.

DH and I found Colic energy sapping and soul destroying with barely any support for parents. Some midwives and others told us that we just had to get on with it.

You are not alone and both of you deserve a big hug. Xx

My ebf eldest daughter has a cmpi, v severe and showed up as blood in her poo at just 5 days old. I had to be dairy free (and soya and egg free in time) it took 2 months for everything to clear her system but she was a different baby afterwards. In fact I was going to suggest that to the OP before I read to the end of the thread (I feel quite smug and almost like a medical person!). She's nearly 3 and stil can't have dairy or soya but we're hoping she'll grow out of it in time. It's more unusual in Brest fed babies but not unheard of.

Oh Iususallylovecake, I totally sympathise with the useless GP issue. The one I saw about the reflux said 'he's putting on weight, you can't necessarily expect him to do it with a smile on his face'. Wrong gender and wrong approach with an exhausted mum!

I saw another one about a temporary birthmark DD2 has after freaking out from googling for the clinical term and convincing myself that her 0.7cm red mark was going to grow to the size of a golfball and cause disfigurement and she made me feel like an idiot.

Do not be afraid to make a nuisance of yourself keep trying different GPs until you find one who recognises that your own mental health is at stake!

Ebf mums with CMPI babies- you're amazing! Your reward is escaping the disgusting prescription formula that smells like instant mash potato.

I can't believe that some gps can be so disinterested melvin just rude!!!! Went again today because LO now has a rash across face and round side of neck so wondered if all linked. Saw a locum who prescribed the probiotic (???? Think that's what it is but really to tired to remember!!!) He thought more likely to help than gaviscon and colief so we'll try that now!!! The battle continues!!!

Best of luck with the probiotic prescription. I've not heard of this, but MrsNai upthread had a positive experience.

Shout if you need to rant!

Another ebf baby with cmp and soy allergies here - I second what the pp said about baby being ENTIRELY different once the problem was sorted. I don't think ebf babies with CMPA are unusual, btw, but it is incredibly difficult for the mother if the allergy is bad enough to stop the mother eating any dairy at all. Dairy is in anything and soy is in pretty much everything processed that advertises itself as a dairy substitute... it's really hard.

But really, really worth it. And if I had a bottle fed baby I wouldn't even hesitate to give it a crack.

Well done HappyPixie . Had breastfeeding not made me absolutely demented very unhappy anyway, I sure as hell would have given up with the CMPI diagnosis. I know how difficult it is to have a very restricted diet for other reasons.

I believe it's about 1% of ebf babies who have CMPI, which I guess is not insignificant. That's compared with up to 5% of bottle fed babies. All to do with the amount of protein they are exposed to.