Getting 7yo to sleep before 10pm

[Zzzmummy]

I'm looking for some advice on how to get my 7yo to sleep earlier. I have three children (7,5,1) and my OH is away a lot for work and it's down to me to get them all to sleep.

Unfortunately we don't have the best sleep habits and both the younger two need me to sit with them to go to sleep - meaning I have to put one child to sleep at a time which is incredibly time consuming and means the other children get hyper/overtired whilst waiting for their 'turn'.

The younger two are typically asleep by 7.30/8 however I am seriously struggling to get my 7yo to sleep before 10pm or later. She says she doesn't want to miss out on what I'm doing and doesn't appear to be tired. I've tried various methods/rewards etc to get her to stay in her room and read or colour whilst I get the other two to sleep but she just goes downstairs to play.

I know she's tired as I can't wake her in the morning for love nor money which really makes mornings stressful as we're always rushing for school.

Any suggestions on how I can improve the situation gratefully received!

She's 7 therefore old enough to stay in bed and read until she's tired without getting up and seeing what you're doing.

** sorry,meant to add she's old enough to be punished for getting out of bed. No telly, lose a toy or whatever. Be firm and consistent.

When you've put the others to bed, sit and let her read to you for an hour or half an hour. Give her a full reading light so she can continue once you've left. Go to bed yourself and read. Make the house really boring and dark.

Poor you OP. sounds like you need complete sleep overhaul 😞😩 If DD isn't in bed until 10, when do you get to sleep?

Is there any way you could get the older of littles down on their own? Maybe have some time to put 1 y/o to bed, and spend time with them to settle and then explain to older two that they can have one story or the like together before bed and then they must be settled into their room with no coming out.
I have had friend who just put DCs to bed, and the first time they get up they explain they have to go back, making sure nothing's wrong. The second time they just say back to bed goodnight, and the third and subsequent times they remain silent whilst putting dc back to bed.

Hth good luck xxx

Just adding onto the end of the putting to bed thing, said friend had three or four awful nights with dozens of up and outs, but within the week they didn't get up at all

Both the 7 and 5 year olds should be going to sleep alone. The older two need the first bedtime, not the younger two.

Your 1 year old is still napping I assume? Therefore 9pm bedtime is not going to be all that significant on baby's routine given you can just adjust daytime naps to fit.

Then I would put the 5 year old and 7 year old up to bed at 7.30/8. Be firm and consistant.

OP, I can't say there is anything I can pass on to help, sadly, as I'm in the same dilemma, only mine is easier than yours because it's only with two children and not three, but yet I still manage to feeling like I'm drowning every single day. I thought it was either a sign of how much my children misbehave, or the fact I've got ms and my disability is such a challenge that I can't cope as well as everyone else, but I suspect it's actually that bedtime problems are a real thing for most people.

I have the problem of both my 7 and just-turned-4 year old wanting me to be with them while they sleep. The 7 year old 'humps' for comfort if I don't, and made himself sore doing so. So it's really important to me that habit breaks, and he learns to sleep without grinding himself on hard objects.

So I bath them together. It's loud, messy, and often fraught with fights, then 7 year old gets himself dressed while I help dress 4 year old for bed. They're both well capable of dressing themselves but if I don't, it doesn't get done because they'd rather play.

At the moment I play a shared podcast with them both, as my MS doesn't allow me to read two stories, and I struggle to even read one story at the moment. We alternate in whose room the podcast is shared, and who chooses the podcast. Then I settle the little one first, while the 7 year old reads quietly to himself in his room. It helps that he's a bookworm. Sometimes he will come and interrupt me settling the other one, and I have to protest that by doing so, the clock of waiting has just been put back, because he's 'woken' the youngest all over again.
Then, eventually, when the youngest is asleep I go in and do it all again with the eldest.

Recently I've taken to sitting between their bedrooms by myself, answering texts or emails, so they know I am there and yet they are learning to sleep alone. I'm hoping it still stops my eldest from 'humping' but it's early days so we shall see.

The 4 year old often comes out to check I am there, under the guise of needing a wee or another cuddle, but its always met with "straight back to bed after" and so far its working.

I have no idea how I'd cope with a 12 month old in the mix though. I hope someone else can come along and give you a helpful answer, maybe I can learn from it too!

The only thing I'm wondering is, does the 12 month old sleep with one of the others? If so, perhaps is try to treat them like one bed room settle, if you see what I mean? Other than that I have no idea what people do!

Thanks everyone for your help. So I took everyone's advice and after putting the youngest to sleep at 7.30pm I then tackled the older two together. We played some games in one of their rooms and then I asked them both to go to their rooms by themselves. All asleep by 8.30pm!

This was probably because they are shattered from an early start tomorrow and is later than I'd like the middle one to be asleep but hey it's total progress for my older one!

NotCertain it sounds like you've got it cracked, my little one has his own room and we have the same thing with the older ones interrupting bedtime which means you have to start all over again!