At rock bottom with 6 month old

[chloechloe]

I don't really know where to start with this!

My 6 mo is a terrible napper and will only sleep for 30min at a time. I go out of my way to make sure she doesn't get overtired, making sure she naps every 1.5 hours. Because I have a 2 yo, this has meant that most naps are in the sling. It's really difficult to get her to sleep in the pram as she just fights sleep and screams until I end up carrying her home.

At the moment these 30min naps are carrying on until 10-11 pm until she finally sleeps for the night (but then waking every 2 hours or so to feed). At first I was putting her to bed at 8ish with a bedtime routine, but then going up every 30min to settle her which seemed to work.

For the last 2 nights however she simply will not sleep in her bed (co-sleeper). She falls asleep but then starts screaming 60 seconds later. After her screaming for 2 hours last night, I gave up after 30 min today and put her in the sling where she's now content and fast asleep.

I'm so so so sick of carrying her round in the sling the whole day and now in the evening as well. I also co-sleep after the first night feed and just want a little bit of space for myself! If this is just a phase I'm happy to go with it for a few days or weeks but I'm scared I'm just digging myself into a hole I'll never climb out of. My back is about to break from lugging her round and then sleeping in a stupid position next to her for most of the night.

Thanks if you've managed to read this far!

I really feel for you OP. It's so difficult to function getting so little sleep. Especially if you have a 2 year old as well. You must be at the end of your tether.

Two things occurred to me reading your post. 1.5 hours between naps doesn't sound like very long for a 6 month old. Maybe she's not tired enough to nap properly. Perhaps if she had longer between naps she'd sleep longer when she does nap. And sleep begets sleep as they say.

The other thing I wondered is if she shows any signs of silent reflux. Wanting to sleep in an upright position can be an indication.

But whatever it is, it will be just a phase and you'll be out the other side before you know it!

I'd sleep train. At 6 months I'd expect 11 hours night time sleep plus 3 naps a day - usually short until it's 2 longer naps. I'd also limit night feeds to 1 a night.

How do you feel about gradual withdrawal?

So do a bedtime routine in a specific order of pjs, milk, teeth (if any) bedroom, gro bag, book and bed in blacked out room.

Put in cot and sit there until asleep. No eye contact or moving from your part just simply sit there.

Feed at one set waking (8 hours after bedtime)

Set yourself some rules and stick to them... so much easier at 6 months before they're standing up.

Have you tried white noise?? I have a 6 month old and the only way she'll nap during the day is with the hoover on. I use an app on my phone that runs all night and plays white noise. I know 100% if u didn't use it she literally wouldn't sleep. (We co-sleep, also with a 2.5yo)

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Is she teething? DD went through a phase of screaming blue murder the moment she was put down/started to drop off just before her bottom two teeth came through.

We found Dentinox gel better than Bonjela, and on the nights she was really really sore some Calpol bought her enough time to fall asleep between crying.

Thank you for all the replies, I wasn't expecting so many so soon!

katkin I'm pretty sure that she's tired after 1.5 hours as she's yawning and rubbing her eyes. She also seems tired not long after waking up - she sleeps precisely 30min so I think she just can't link her sleep cycles yet.

I really don't think gradual withdrawal is the right thing at the moment missanony. She gets so worked up if I don't pick her up that she starts coughing and spluttering. I did the shush / pat method with my first which I would like to do again as I think it's a great way to get them to learn to go to sleep, but she's just too hysterical at the moment.

I do use white noise daisy and it helps to get her to sleep but at the moment she's just hysterical whereas normally she would drop off to sleep with me sitting beside her. I've been leaving it on all night which does seem to have improved things a bit.

It could well be teething kingfisher as her first bottom tooth came through a few days ago. I've always struggled with teething gel with my first as I just can't seem to keep her still to get it on her gums. I might go and get the bottle of Calpol and have it at the ready, I think it will be another terrible night.

Op I tried everything to get to nap longer when he was small. He only ever did 30 minute naps and was a fairly temperamental sleeper at night. Weirdly it all clicked into place suddenly once he was off walking at 12 months. He had better naps and woke only once or twice at night.

Is your DD crawling yet? I really am hoping it's a phase. Sorry I don't have better advice.

If she's really hysterical I agree with you chloe that it's probably best not to try that just yet.
Sounds promising that white noise seems to help, we have to use the actual hoover during the day to get dd to sleep (it's much louder than the white noise app on my phone) maybe give that a go??
I know at this age a lot of baby's develop separation anxiety so maybe she's going through that as well?

My first was similar nutella in that she suddenly started napping longer at 8 months when she started crawling and eating more solids. I was banking on it getting better in two months' time, I hope I don't have to wait until 12 months like you! DD2 is starting to crawl but is going round in circles rather than forwards at the moment!

It's funny the lengths we go to to get them to sleep daisy! When she's really fussy and can't nap I put the extractor fan on full blast! If nothing else it takes the edge off the crying for my own benefit!

It could well be related to separation anxiety, although it strangely doesn't bother her so much in the day. We've had 3 awful nights and tonight seems to be more if the same. She falls asleep for 5-20 minutes then wakes up screaming. The ridiculous thing is that both last night and tonight I put her down in my bed when she was crying and she fell fast asleep! She clearly wants to be with me and not in her own bed! I hope it's just a phase as I'm really not one for long term co-sleeping.