How to get baby to self settle

[redjumper]

My DC3 is 7 weeks old and I pretty much can't put him down at all. He only naps in the sling in the day and at night falls asleep after prolonged pacing aroubd the bedroom, he then cosleeps pressed up.against me. I've had quite a baby led approach with my first two - cosleeping , babywearing most of the day, feeding to sleep etc. But I ended up regretting it a bit with DC1 when he wanted to be latched on all night or needed rocking to sleep as a 12 month old baby. I then did sleep training which was traumatic and I wished I'd 'taught him to self soothe' at a much younger age.
With DD2 she naturally slept wherever I put her and got herself into a nice routine. She's been a great sleeper.
As a result I'm keen to get off on a good foot this time and encourage my DC3 to fall to sleep by himself. However, it's not easy! When i put him in his basket, even if swaddled, in the dark, with white noise (Ewan the sheep) he usually just cries and cries to the point of getting beside himself. I give it a set time of usually 10 mins where I jig the basket and have my hand on his chest. I've also tried running the Hoover round or just leaving the room but he still really fights it. I end up picking him up and rocking him to sleep or putting him in the sling.
Please could I have some advice? Should I be more persistent perhaps and try for longer? What do people do to encourage their babies to self settle?

I should clarify that my hope is just for my DS to get decent naps at the moment and to set up good habits, I'm not looking to get him to sleep through the night particularly. I dont expect that for a long time yet.

Have you tried a dummy? The greatest possible tool for independant sleeping, in my view.

Aside from that, at 7 weeks old, independant sleeping will just mean being put down once asleep. It's virtually impossible to seperate feeding and sleeping at this age, since mostly baby will only feed and sleep. That will change past 3 months or so though.

For daytime naps, sleeps in something that moves is more conducive to independant sleep than being rocked in your arms - bouncer, pushchair.

At bedtime, how about a side car cot as an interim between cosleeping and independant sleep?

I have an 8 week old and have had intermittent success in getting him to self settle. What I have found (mostly) works is to get him to the point he's very drowsy and almost asleep before putting him in his crib with a sleeping bag on. He then usually fusses a little, then goes to sleep, sometimes with the aid of a dummy.
I have found if I put him down fast asleep, he wakes after 30 mins in a bit of a state, maybe because he has woken up somewhere different to where he fell asleep.
If he gets to agitated and won't settle, I pick him up again and repeat the process-getting him very drowsy but awake before putting him in the crib.
I did this with DS1 who has always been a fab sleeper, so hoping the same world on his baby brother!

Thank you

Re dummy- I've never had any success with dummies with my previous two who just spat them out and gagged. I have tried with DC3 and he has fallen asleep, the dummy falls out and he wakes and the cycle repeats. Then I've given up. Perhaps I should be more persistent and use it more often.

Re the sleeping/feeding link. I've read baby whisperer who advises the Eat Actvity Sleep routine and putting your baby down awake right from the start. She says that by rocking to sleep from 0-3 months you are teaching your baby to expect that and by 3 months it'll be 'pandemonium' hence the advice to self settle from birth. I dont know really, do you think it's better to wait till 3 months?
Unfortunately he doesn't sleep in the pram, bouncy chair, car etc at the moment.
Yes we have a sidecar and I'm hoping to get him in there, perhaps now is the time to start pushing that a bit more.
Thanks again, your reply is much appreciated

Thank you my cat. That sounds like good practical advice I can try out.

Learning to self soothe is a very hard skill for them to learn, so I think you have to be patient and persistent to crack it. I got a bit of a routine going with DS1 so he knew the 'cues' for nap time; when he showed signs of tiredness I'd take him up to the bedroom, close the curtains and put him in his sleeping bag before getting him to wind down whilst cuddling/singing to him until he was drowsy. After a couple of months doing this I could then put him into his cot awake and he would chatter to himself until he fell asleep. I hoping it will work again this time 🤞
Re:the dummy-I usually sit out of sight until he's in a deep sleep then gently remove the dummy when he's relaxed and it's hanging out anyway. That stops it dropping out suddenly and waking him. Hope it helps.

Hi

What time are you looking for him to go to sleep? I tried the pacing thing and then decided not to bother and just let him fall asleep downstairs when he is ready - less stressful for me! Currently at 10 weeks he is going at about 8.30 and then I go straight to bed too cuz his longest stretch is then of 3 hrs.

Mine is half awake from 4ish onwards and I just keep putting his dummy back in over and over to tide him over til 6 when we get up. He doesn't want food at 4 - I'm hoping this will run its course and he will sleep better than this soon!

X

Thank you. I guess I'm hoping he'll go to sleep, not on me, at around 7pm so we have some evening to ourselves. We get up at 7-8am and i have it in my mind that he should be getting 12 hours sleep (with feeds in between). Not that im expecting him to sleep in his cot in the evening yet, probably the moses basket or sleepyhead beside us.