Screaming Baby at 2.30 am!!! - seperation anxiety????? - sorry long ramble

[pelvicflawed]

Have already put a couple of posts up recently but about DS 10mth noctural wakings which seem to be getting worse!!. Each night we put him to bed 7/7.30 most nights he's fine though in the last few days we have suddenly had a bit of fuss. Goes to sleep then wakes around 2.30-3.30 sitting in cot screaming - we go in give brief reassurance/return dummy and try to leave - thats where it goes wrong and he starts screaming again. We've tried sitting with him and slowly withdrawing fromn the room but as soon as he realises we've gone he blasts. Last two nights he's come into our bed and within minutes he snuggles down/goes quiet and after 1/2hr or so drops off for the rest of the night until 6/6.30 (normal waking). This is ok in terms of getting some sleep - but I find it uncomforatble (he's lovely but boy does he wriggle and I end on the edge of the bed) and DH and I don't feel we're sleeping well, when we do nod off. Up til now he's been a fairly good sleeper - normally gone through the night with just a few grumbles for lost dummy (which when returned settled him ). Please any help both our backs hurt today becuase of weird sleeping positions and we're getting fed up and exhausted, I'm also getting down that I'm having to go to bed so early to get some sleep that I feel I never get any time with DH or can relax (though watching DS asleep so close is lovely! - just not every night!!)

10 mths is usually an age where they're reaching a "Development milestone" - is he learning to cruise, stand, walk? My DD was terrible at that age for early waking, it really does knacker you out so I can sympathise.

Co-sleeping wasn't the answer for us I'm afraid. Like your DS, DD was a wriggler and I often slept on the edge of the bed with her feet on my head. I used my own version of PUPD (Baby whisperer method) to get her to sleep in her cot at around 3 mths so used a similar version around 7/8 mths. If you do a search under pick up put down or baby whisperer, you should be able to get an idea of what it entails.

It was a good method for us because it meant I didn't have to leave her to cry plus I felt like I was doing something positive to help her settle. there were a few nights where I literally had to go in a dozen times but consistency does work honestly!

The good news is that it doesn't last forever. DD is 2 years old and rarely has a bad night [touching wood emoticon]

Thanks for the advice - he's not yet standing, but does pull himself onto his knees and he kind of pulled himself up over a cushion yesterday (to get to the buttons on DVD!). He does suddenly seem to developing quickly for example his finger eating skills have suddenly got much better etc so perhpas there is a development stage going on. We'll have ago at PUPD its just that we're getting a bit panicked that our once sleeping child who we could leave with grandparents overnight (we've done this once and have a night away at wedding planned in May) will never sleep again peacefully. Dosen't help that I'm going back to work in two weeks and am not looking forward to being tired like I was with a newborn again. Thanks for your words of comfort that it dosen't last for ever!

Well if he's had a sudden developmental spurt, then his waking is almost definitely due to his new found skills!

The bad news is that he'll do this every time he learns something new.

The good news is that with consistency from you, he'll soon learn that it's not so much fun and he'd rather be sleeping!!

He might also be subconsciously picking up on your fear of returning to work. DD was awful during that period and I felt so guilty that I was going from spending every waking minute with her to leaving her from 9 to 5 every day. Looking back, I'm so sure that some of her desire to wake up at night was due to my fear at leaving her.

Try not to worry - he'll have some adjusting but you will work it out. It'll just take some practice and lots of love and hugs xx

My dd2(14months) also does this .
She goes to bed and falls asleep on her own then will wake up screaming anytime between 10.30 and 3.30 and will not go back in her cot.It has got to the point where as soon as she wakes i just bring her into bed with me as it is easier and prevent's dd1 from being disturbed.
I have become a co-sleeper against my will.

Hi Pelvicfloornomore - I'm really glad we're not the only ones. Last night DH was determined DS wasn't going to come into bed with us and we tried a combination of the PUPD method and gradual withdraw from the room - with a lot of shusssing from DH (don't know about DS but made me feel sleepy!) anyway we're exhasusted today but after about 1/2hr each time (12am, 4am 5 am ish)we did get him off again and this morning at 7.20 DS didn't want to wake up for nursery (the cheek!) I think we need to keep going with it now - DH is more determined than me - I'd have prefered to let him into bed and have ago at the weekend. Hope (cross fingers, toes etc) that this is a phase we can get over. I don't mind the waking its the waking and the difficulty settling poor DS and the stress that gets to me.

PS - love the name - must be on the err same pelvic wavelength!!!!