Waking up too early and pooping... I'm desperate!

[pikapoo]

DS is 11.5 months and for the past 2 months has been waking up early (between 5-6am) with poo in his nappy and very grumpy. We're not sure if it's the poo waking him up, or if he is waking up then pooing, if you see what I mean.

He is very grumpy when he wakes up, very difficult to handle and refuses to go back to bed after his nappy is dealt with. This is despite dim lighting, giving him some milk etc. He goes to bed between 7-8, usually naps twice a day or about 3 hours in total (waking up by 4pm if not earlier from his second nap).

We are at our wits' end as to what might be be causing this. It's exhausting as we are both working as well, and handling a grumpy baby for 3 hours before starting work for the day is starting to take its toll.

Any advice much appreciated.

theclick - the thing that cracked it for us was sending in someone else other than mummy during the night wakings to settle him (the BF comfort association was strong). It took a few nights. This was 2 months ago (he'd been in his own room since 6 months). In my NCT group the only ones still waking up regularly at night are the ones whose mothers are still happy to offer night time breastfeeds when they wake up, to help them get back to sleep.

Thanks! That kind of falls into line with what others have told me about getting them to sleep through too...

You could try putting him to bed a bit later now the evenings are lighter but it isn't foolproof. Many children and even some adults just do wake up very early, which is one reason I hate Gro clocks but anyway!

Thanks for the suggestions LapinR0se and others.

I think we'll start with cutting short his morning naps. It's so tempting to let him nap for longer in the mornings as he can go for between 40-90 minutes. Not least we'd have to ask the nursery to help us out with this on the days that he's there! But worth a try. Will also cut out fruit before bed.

Not sure how your baby waking up at 5/6 is exhausting for both you?! Alternate which one of you tends to the baby in morning. What time would you normally get up for work otherwise?

We would normally get up around 6:30/7 for work. Sometimes we alternate (but it is difficult for the person not attending to fall back asleep). Also it is much easier to deal with the dirty nappy + grumpy fighting baby with two pairs of hands .

And when DS grumps he is really difficult to handle (being very big for his age and very strong). He is longer than half my height.

My DS is 13 months and he is similar, almost always has a dirty nappy first thing in the morning. He doesn't have fruit at tea, just a light tea and a yoghurt (main meal at lunch). It's just his routine ... but it is annoying, as if he wakes early he needs changing and can't just be resettled with his dummy etc.

We have also been suffering from early wakings and it is awful, I'm surprised by the lack of sympathy on this thread! Being up from 5.30am makes for a very long day and it's easy to say just go to bed earlier but I work full time and only have 2/3 hours of an evening as it is. DS has got noticeably worse with the early waking in the last few weeks so we're wondering if it's the lighter mornings and have just installed a black out blind in his room. Do you have one? I'll report back if it helps!

Thanks Me624. Yes it's precisely that, we both have full-time very hectic jobs so an extra half hour or hour of sleep in the morning (plus a non-grumpy baby) makes a huge difference.

Sounds like the bowel movement might just be part and parcel of this age/stage for some babies. We have black out blinds but they do let some light in on the fringes (so technically not black out I guess!)... please let me know how your DS gets on!

I've thought about this a bit more in light of some of the comments about DS getting lots of sleep compared to some babies. It's true that he seems to like his beauty sleep.. I've also spent a fair bit of effort on helping him fall asleep around certain times for his naps. So maybe the real issue is DS just happens to be a very grumpy baby! He has very cheerful and happy moments in the day, but spends quite a bit of time grumping too. I know it might be very normal at this age especially as they can't speak yet so communication is a bit hit and miss (eg I'm sometimes not sure if he's tired or hungry when he grumps). But it really wears me and DH down when we are unable to distract him or get down to the root cause of the grumps.

I think you need to get over 2 of you being required at 5.30 am to change a nappy.

Dh prefers me to help give calpol in the night but with 3 under 5 there is no reason I am getting up if it is his turn. I might be up again soon. Likewise morning nappies which also involve poo and grumpy here. We hold out as late as possible as there is no getting him back in his cot happily and then try to keep him quiet on his mat.

The older ones still often poo in the morning; luckily one of them can wipe herself now.

He is longer than half my height. I assume you are closer to 5' than 5'10"?

Get to grips with his moods fast, he's only going to get bigger! Using distractions / encouraging him to play nicely can be a successful strategy.

Update - first time in weeks that he didn't have poo in nappy when he woke up in the morning. We did not include any fruit and protein in his dinner (though he had a banana in the mid-afternoon for a snack). Could be a coincidence, will report back again after a few days of trying this.

Great news!

Did he still wake early, just without a poo? Or did you get a bit of a lie-in?

Here's hoping for the latter

Ds 1 was up.for the day at 4.30am at that age, in spite of all my best efforts. Sometimes he would nod back off if I took him in my bed and bf.

He's 21months now and for the last week has pooped on/just before waking. For no apparent reason.

No poo again this morning. I gave some fruit around 4:45pm, but again no protein or fruits with dinner.
He's been waking up early-ish again though, but I think that's because we are away staying in a hotel this weekend and he's developed a blocked nose at night from the dry air which has been disturbing his sleep.

highinthesky - I'm about 5ft3... would be grateful for any distraction/encouragement tips for my grumpy DS! We manage to distract him during the day from most of his grumps. But first thing in the morning is another matter...

No more advice pikapoo, only sympathy! The black out blind has made not a blind bit of difference (ha!) - yesterday, 4.40am (eventually went back to sleep after a nappy change and about an hour of shouting) and today, 5am - again, an hour or so of shouting before he had another half an hour from 6-6.30am. (DH and I got no further sleep!)

He used to be such a beautiful 7pm - 6/6.30am sleeper! Caffeine for me today ...

It will probably all.be different in a few weeks. Sleeping phases tend to pass and move on (Sometimes worse)

Me624 - sadly the blackout blinds here in the hotel room have made no difference either

I had the 430 start again today !!

Just another update - another poo-free wake-up this morning (YAY). I'm convinced the culprit is fruit as have since noticed that during the day, he tends to poo soon after having fruit!

Unfortunately the other half of the problem (Early Waking) persists. It's compounded by him always being grumpy in the evenings, certainly at least the hour or two before bedtime. We usually can't even get through his dinnertime without massive grumps and occasional meltdown. Today I was seriously contemplating putting on some (educational) YouTube clip to distract him (bad mummy alert). And once he'd had his bath, cue the usual massive grumping for 5 minutes as we got him dressed and ready for bed.

I used to put it down to overtiredness. However, as PP have pointed out, he seems an excellent sleeper. So why oh why is he being like this? And is it linked to his EW? DH and I are really struggling in the mornings and evenings with DS's moodiness. He has many happy moments but when he grumps - oh boy. Before anyone tells me this is typical of a baby etc - I genuinely think his grumpiness is above average compared to other babies we know. We dread it so much. I just wish I knew how to help DS be happier!

Yes early morning waking is linked to overtiredness and nap times.
What's his schedule like now with the early wake up?

Glad you've had no more early morning poos pika.

The last 2 days my DS has woken early (4.30, 5) but has gone back to sleep with little fuss thank goodness. I'm no closer to working it out!

I don't think there's anything wrong with a bit of TV personally. If DS is really grumpy in the late afternoons we sometimes watch a couple of Peppa Pigs with him cuddled up on my lap. It calms him down and recharges him a bit.

@LapinR0se:

5:00-6:00 wake up, nappy change, offered water, quick cuddle as we walk around the flat (he is normally wriggly so cuddles are short-lived), books and toys in his play area in the living room

6:30/7:00 bottle of milk (5oz)

(Off to nursery)
8:30 (+/- 30 minutes) breakfast at nursery

9:30 nap for between 40-90 minutes depending on how early he woke up in the morning

10:30 snack

12:00 lunch

13:30 bottle of milk (6oz)

14:30 nap for 40-90 minutes, depending on how long his morning nap was

16:00 tea

18:00 dinner at home

18:30/19:00 bath and bedtime routine. Up till a couple of weeks ago he was asleep by 7, but we have found he is now fighting it a bit and won't fall asleep till closer to 8/8:30 (by which point DH and I are v frazzled by the aforementioned grumps). He then sleeps through till 5-6am.

Reading back the above, I get that it looks like I may have little to fret about regarding his schedule and sleep. Guess what I'm still trying to work out is whether his grumping is due to personality, schedule or something else!

@Me624, that's good news that he's gone back to sleep rather than staying awake in the early AM. I might try have 5 minutes of chill time with a nursery rhyme music video before and after dinner to see if it helps calm him down.