For over a week now over the xmas holidays we've been using a sleep consultant to sort 21 month old ds sleep. He was taking hours to go to sleep and wouldn't without being cuddled or fed, was feeding several times a day and night and waking sometimes hourly then in bed early hours with us, feeding. I am exhausted and just couldn't carry on with it. So it's been a week of really hard wOrkney, 5am waking where I've had to sit with him screaming and try to convince him it's still night time for 2 hrs, waking for hours in the middle of the night, 2 hour bed times. I've done all of it, as ds just gets more distressed if dh puts him to bed and we figured it was best to just get the worst (ds going to sleep without me feeding him) over with whilst we are both on holidays. DH had read the plan and knew the routine we had to follow and I'd told him each night what I'd done. We were finally making progress as ds was waking later and hadn't fed more than morning and evening for a few days.
He finally promises me, after I have got up with ds every morning of the holidays, usually before 6, that I can have a lie in this morning. Fab, because I am totally exhausted and we sat up a bit too late last night watching TV and I might have polished off a bottle of red.
Except ds wakes at 5am. And instead of doing it the hard way, what I've been doing every fucking morning for over a week, he gets him up and puts him in our bed. Where of course he wakes me up and tries to feed. I put up with him laying down on me wide awake for an hour then told dh to take him back to bed, where he screamed the place down for 30 mins. I've just stated the day early by feeding him and sending him down with DH and come back to bed. I'm wide awake and won't get back to sleep now. This will still volunteers as my bastard lie in though. Fucker.
I am so angry when I don't get sleep!
Why is is so fucking difficult to stick to a plan?! 2 weeks I had to try and get us all better sleep. We are desperate, all of us. It was starting to work. If I don't cave whilst he's screaming and clawing at my top to get a boob out at 3 am first 2 hrs how can he not just do what I've been doing and go into him, close the fucking door and let me sleep?
This is so hard and we're going to have yet another evening whee I'm putting him to bed with him screeching at me for over an hour and I don't even have the hope he might now sleep past 5 tomorrow morning as we're probably back where we started regarding early mornings.
Rant over. Just needed to get that off my chest!