Stopping bf to sleep questions

[redtammy]

I am planning to work on stopping bf my DD to sleep every time she wakes up during the evening - at the moment this is every 15- 30 minutes or so during the evening when I am not sleeping with her. Overnight when we co-sleep it is every 2-3 hours, which is manageable. My plan was to move her last feed so it is pre bath, then stay and comfort as needed (a combo of pupd/comfort in cot as works best) but not feed. She sometimes takes a dummy so am planning to give her that also. My question is really whether I am sending mixed messages if I am happy to feed her overnight but not in the evening, or is this feasible? I read the Jay Gordon night weaning article and although that talked about doing this for a core block overnight I couldn't see why the same principle wouldn't apply here. I just want there to be some prospect of me having an evening again soon, and perhaps someone else (DH/MiL) being able to put her to bed once in a while. Has anyone successfully continued co-sleeping but got their evening back?

How old is she?

Sorry, dripfeeding, 6.5 months; eating solids (usually breakfast and supper) and I am consciously ensuring she is feeding well (having full feeds rather than snacking) during the day as this has been suggested to me as a possible reason for her frequent waking.

6.5 months is possibly a bit small - she's the exact same age as DS2 who isn't ready to drop feeds yet. Jay Gordon says wait until a year, I think.

The pre-bed feed was the last one to go with DS1 at 2.8 years...but he was seriously addicted to BF!

FWIW I did the Jay Gordon method with ds when he was 20 months and it worked well. I had to psyche myself up for it and the first wake-up was 45 mins of frustrated shouting ("open the boobie!!!!" etc) with me next to him in the bed cuddle/wrestling(!) him and trying to say "it's ok mommy's here" etc but after that a calm quiet and eventually fell asleep. Two more wake ups that first night but for much shorter times.

I don't know if they get confused but What I had done quite a long time beforehand was started reading him stories to get him to fall asleep at the start of the night tho, probably from around 18 months. But ds had been a boob monster and regular waker, every 2 hours or more from birth so I know what you mean abut getting an evening! Best of luck.

Oh god 6 months is far too young IMO sorry!

Not too small! No way does she need to feed all evening like that. I'd start small. Just so the last feed as usual but wake her a bit before putting her down. Maybe. Y putting her into her gro bag after feeding and wandering around saying g food night to a couple of things. Then pop her down and just don't feed her if she wakes before 1am. Settle in her cot if possible. Good luck!

Queen 'open the boobie!' I had the exact same 'conversation' with DS1 when I Jay Gordon-ed him he was more than 20 months

I don't think it's a mixed message, no. I'd possibly think about limiting night feeds to nothing before a certain time and then only every 4 hours after but that's up to you. It may space out on its own.

Restless evenings are very often a result of overtiredness in the day and their own issue.

I feel night weaning and any kind of training is better done before they get into wilful toddlers who like to say no! Much easier before they like standing up to protest