Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Original poster

Latest FSIDS advice..

25 replies

Chillout · 13/02/2007 09:45

..says stay in the room always when babe is asleep. No problem for me during the day, and at night is still in with us so no prob there either. However, between 7, when he goes to bed, and 11ish, when we do, he's in our room alone. Baby monitor on at all times. Having just read this latest advice yesterday I was up and down checking all the time between his bedtime and ours. Am I being daft?
Is the rationale behind being in the same room that adult breathing helps regulate the child, or is it still unknown? I shall ask my hv at clinic later, but curious as to what others do. Ta.

OP posts:
Enid · 13/02/2007 09:48

well as you wanted to know what others do...I co-slept with both of mine in a big bed with a thick duvet and they slept on their tummies

when they went into cots they slept on their tummies too - dd1 and 2 went into their own room at about 3 months

dd3 stayed with me for 6 months (last baby syndrome ) she is sleeping upstairs now in her cot, on her tummy. and I don't have a monitor.

Not saying any of this is right BTW but it is what I do/did.

Original poster
Chillout · 13/02/2007 09:56

Methinks I am perhaps being a bit newmumish...good exercise though!

OP posts:
hunkermunker · 13/02/2007 09:57

Weren't you not fussed about weaning guidelines though? Why the worry with this?

Original poster
Chillout · 13/02/2007 10:02

Totally different subject, totally different worry!

OP posts:
clutteredup · 13/02/2007 10:19

I think that alot of the advice is over cautious, if you spend 24/7 with anyone let alone a baby you're going to end up going mental and wanting to smother them, if your baby is well and happy ( and according to FSIDS safe by lying on back) you should not have to be there when they are asleep aswell as all the time they are awake. i'd have killed all 3 of mine if I didn't get some time out when they were asleep, I'm not a nutter just a normal mum! How do they expect you to eat, wash, see to your other children and family and oh yes have a modicum of a life?

kbaby · 13/02/2007 22:00

totally unrealistic. how can they expect you to keep a child with you all the time while they are sleeping.

CountTo10 · 13/02/2007 22:05

Very unrealistice. I would presume they are advising it so if baby rolls onto their front or stops breathing etc, you're on hand. I was a worrier with this which I knew I would be so I got an angel monitor. It has a pad that sits underneath babs and monitors their breathing. An alarm sounds if the gap between breaths is too long. If you are nervous about this I would invest in one of these. It was £65 but believe me the ability it gave me to relax and 'switch off' was worth it 10 times over!!!

aviatrix · 13/02/2007 22:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

lulumama · 13/02/2007 22:24

i thought it said that naps were better taken where the parent could keep an eye on teh baby. ie in a moses basket or pram downstairs rather than alone in the cot upstairs, it does not mean you have to sit in the room with them for hours and not do anything else

lulumama · 13/02/2007 22:26

here is some advice re the new FSID guidlines....

MrsJohnCusack · 13/02/2007 22:26

had a look last night and they seem to be saying that up til 6 months, you should be present at all sleeps including daytime ones. so have your baby in sleeping in a carrycot or something in the same room as you

I can't see how that works with other children around

but it also says that most SIDS deaths in daytime sleeps occur when the baby has been put to sleep on it's side/front or the covers have gone over the head

I'm sure it is safer to have them with you but it's surely quite unrealistic to be with your sleeping baby all the time for 6 months? But of course now it's said lots of people will feel that they must do so.

MrsJohnCusack · 13/02/2007 22:27

its not it's

MrsJohnCusack · 13/02/2007 22:29

I'll end up following the guidelines I know
the new baby will just have to learn to sleep through the sounds of a squealing toddler. I refuse to get a baby monitor in a one storey house this size, I will end up a paranoid anxious PND wreck again

but it does seem that the main risks are still, as always, sleeping on side/front and covers over the head

Chandra · 13/02/2007 22:30

I think next they are going to ask us to carry our children on slings 24/7. It may be safer but unrealistic and not good for mum's sanity, I would think.

BuffysMum · 13/02/2007 22:32

I always just made sure the room etc was very cool (aka freezing), but them on their back etc. I think the biggest factor is genetic predisposition and you can't do anything about that unless you know about it. Or get one of those alarm things that goes off when they stop breathing although apparantly you get lots of flase alarms!

Aloha · 13/02/2007 22:35

Ah well, dd would never blooming well have afternoon naps anyway!

KristinaM · 13/02/2007 22:38

we had an apnoea monitor for two of our children and didnt get many false alarms. they were mostly when the tape had come off their tummies, which technically isn't a flase alarm at all

Plibble · 13/02/2007 22:54

Honestly I found the old advice impossible to comply with and moved DD into her own room at around 14 weeks - I would have done it at 3 weeks but DH wouldn't let me . I am sure I would never have been able to manage the new advice either. To me the old advice read as though if the baby was in the room with you you would somehow check on it more often. At night, the only thing I was looking at was the inside of my eyelids and I would not have looked at DD unless she did something to wake me up - getting a sheet over her face was not going to do the trick. Moving her out was probably better for her if anything because we had a motion sensor on the cot. I'm not saying I was right to do that, but seriously, I was too tired to do much checking and I credit the fact that she slept through so early to the fact that I didn't get up for every squeak...

ScoobyC · 14/02/2007 09:25

Just a thought - just cos its difficult advice to follow doesn't mean its bad advice and not safer for the child.
Like anything I think its about risk levels - you cannot exclude all risk for your child you just have to minimise risk as far as you are able. If it is not realistic to be there all the time they are sleeping then exclude other risk factors - sleeping on front, covers, too hot etc.
Personally ds has never slept on his back as he would always wake himself up with flailing arms and I was unhappy with swaddling as was told this is a risk as they cannot free themselves if too hot. So he has always slept on his side and then turned himself onto his front as soon as he was able. But I felt I excluded as many risk factors as possible and then just tried not to worry about it!
I guess if you want to follow the guidelines then try to get your baby sleeping in a moses basket and be used to noise and then they can sleep with you downstairs til you go up to bed.
xxx

ggglimpopo · 14/02/2007 09:32

Message withdrawn

MrsJohnCusack · 14/02/2007 09:48

and of course you did do your best ggglimpopo

Budababe · 14/02/2007 09:55

Oh God - GGG - that is shocking about the child in the pushchair. That has sent shivers down my spine.

Flower3554 · 14/02/2007 10:01

Hugs ggg xxx

The report also says you should nap when your baby does, so how are you meant to be watching them if you're asleep

Aloha · 14/02/2007 12:06

It's not so much the watching them, more the fact that someone else is there probably makes them sleep slighly less deeply which seems to reduce the risk. Dummies work in much the same way, constantly causing a slight arousal and the dummy slips out and the baby has to suck harder to keep it in.
But we cannot be perfect in every way, and sometimes for a woman's sanity she is better off having a break from the baby. And naps are good for children's health, happiness and wellbeing (if you can persuade the little buggers to have one) and if you have more than one child at home, that nap will have to be somewhere quiet - ie in another room. So what do you do? Let a child be miserable and sleep deprived which may put their health at risk or put them to sleep in another room and face a tiny increased risk of SIDS (which you can reduce by using a sleeping bag, lying the baby on its back etc etc)

ScoobyC · 18/02/2007 09:33

ggglimpopo - so so sorry to hear about Maude. My heart goes out to you.
xx

New posts on this thread. Refresh page