High needs baby - does it ever end???

[Beemommy]

Hi all,

It's 5 am and I finally got him to sleep...

As a newborn DS was diagnosed with both colic and reflux and they said it would get better by 3 months and I was waiting patiently until then but nothing changed. Then there was another deadline of 6 months and then some again said that for sure it will get better at 9 months... he is 9,5 now and back to newborn stage waking up every hour and very hard to settle...

So when does it end?? Any experiences please? Really need some cheering up.....

My DS's reflux was prominent until he was about 22 months.
His reflux was severe and he was hospitalised On many occasions as he became a failure to thrive baby.

Now aged 7 if you show him something he doesn't want to eat he can reflux all over the floor. He is severely disabled.

I had a high needs baby who started sleeping at 6 months but only because we had a sleep trainer come in and help us out. He used to scream all night in my arms and sleep for short bursts (also in my arms walking around) in between so it wasn't sustainable - none of the gentle methods worked at all. The sleep training isn't for everyone but it was an easy decision for us because he actually cried considerably less on nights when we sleep trained than on the previous nights when we were walking round the house / sticking him in the pram etc trying to help him off to sleep. I can see that if you had a baby that co slept / slept alone even and then woke briefly every hour or so and just needed resettling it might be a harder decision.

Ps. He had reflux and colic too which started to subside at around 4-5 months so he didn't have that when we did the sleep training.

DS was like this and turns out it was allergy related. Didn't realise until he was two he was allergic to eggs. Was a nightmare, I lost my mind with sleep deprivation.

Yes. DD was also like this, and also allergy related. She is 5 now and has been a fairly good sleeper for a long time now.

I'm up with DD2. First waking since I went to bed! She's 3 months.

My son got better aged 3 (with sticker bribery). Now aged 7 he's a great sleeper. I had to wake him up yesterday at half 7 for school. It was incredibly satisfying!

Come and join our support thread!

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/sleep/2524238-high-needs-baby-support-thread

I also immediately wondered about allergies and intolerances. My DD is 15 months and was a bad refluxer. She is now much better, but it comes back when she eats anything she is intolerant to. Unfortunately, this list is long, and we are still yet to know about many foods, as we have to introduce new foods very gradually and observe for intolerance and allergic reactions (think adding one food in increasing quantities over five days. If a reaction we wait till it subsides before trying anything else, which can take 10 days....).

It is a pain, especially as she is intolerant to many foods that don't usually cause a problem, such as carrot and grapes, as well as the usual dairy, wheat etc.

You could ask for a referral to an allergy clinic. Ours is brilliant, and have been such a help with working through this minefield.

Hope things get better for you and your LO soon.

Thanks a lot ladies...

Actually in terms of reflux it seems to be gone at 5 months as in he doesn't puke after every feed anymore but I'm not sure if it's still bothering him "on the inside".

Regarding the allergies we have taken him to an allergy specialist and tested him for every possible allergy and all tests came out negative... we have also taken him to few different pediatrician who said his health is perfect...

I guess he is just a difficult one and I can't do anything other than sit and wait until he outgrows it...but 3 years seems an eternity from now...

DS has delayed allergies which don't show up on tests. This is partly why it took two years to realise he was allergic to eggs! The symptoms were really silent reflux, poor sleep due to tummy ache and the occasional odd looking poo.

He's also allergic to dairy & soy but the symptoms were more obvious with those (D&V).

I sleep trained endlessly and even paid £350 to get specialist help but nothing worked until we cut eggs out, then things improved a lot.

I'd try the sleep consultant. I know a couple of people who did this and their babies were completely different once they were getting enough sleep. Good luck!

@computerdog can you please recommend some? I'm not in UK though so it would only work if they do a skype/email consultations. Thanks!